Promises Made ch 3

Green Eyed Monsters Don't Play Fair

Roman was still at the Penthouse pacing back and forth across the living room floor, seething with anger and jealousy; it was four years ago all over again. There was one man standing in the way of his happiness, one man who threatened everything he cared about, one man he...hated! It was invigorating to let the bitterness return, to admit how he felt deep inside. That man was John Black and the more Roman thought about it, the more the anger and jealousy grew, until he was filled with the bitter resentment he spent years trying to master, trying to put away, trying to understand what had happened. Well, this time it was just too much to take. "I'm NOT just going to walk away this time, I'm not going to let you have her, John! I'm going to make life miserable for you as long as you try to make her yours. You will be very sorry you lied to me again, my...friend." His face was full of hatred, ice cold hatred. It was as if in the second he heard John admit that he and Marlena were in love and had lied about it from the moment Roman returned, the thin veil of renewed friendship and forgiveness disappeared as if never there in the first place.

Roman felt exactly the way he did on the day of Belle's Christening, hurt, betrayed, humiliated, jealous and angry... very angry. But this time, he wasn't going to run and he wasn't going to blame Marlena. For some reason, this time he wanted to take all of his pain out on his rival. John was the pursuer, the home wrecker and in Roman's mind he deserved to suffer the same fate and experience the same agonizing sense of loss that he did on that day and for a long time afterward. Devastated was a more accurate word to describe how he felt that day and on the day that clinched his initial decision to leave, the day he learned that he was not the father of that precious little angel, baby Belle. To learn that beautiful little girl was not his, the child he named for the deceased wife of his good friend John Black, was gutwrenchingly painful. "I was honoring my close...*friend,* who as it turned out had betrayed me in the worst way possible, the man who stole the heart of the only woman I have ever truly loved!" Roman wanted to repay the favor and take Marlena away from John; it was the best way to hurt him.

Marlena had always been John's weak spot, that much Roman did believe. John would suffer anything for her, including giving her up if he perceived it was necessary to make her happy in some way. "Now.... Roman, how are you going to make it seem...necessary to John?" Then it came to him, he didn't need to go that far at all. He would capitalize on Marlena's weakness, her compassion for him and her lingering guilt for the affair. Roman knew that he could take advantage of her feelings to divide her attention, even now that the other two had probably discussed the fact that he knew the truth. She would feel torn about hurting him and it would be very upsetting to her to actually follow through with telling him there wasn't any chance for him, especially if he appeared ill. John would want to move forward with the relationship and the tension between he and Marlena would increase. Roman could make use of that tension to move in on her and gradually he could insinuate himself into her life, enough to threaten the relationship. John would become anxious and tired of waiting and he would push her to marry and she would resist because she hated being pushed. That would be the perfect time to make a decisive strike. If he could pull it off, he might just cause them to separate for a cooling off period and if he got that far....well, then..all bets were off. "Yes, this is going to work, I know it will!" he said to himself. As he concluded formulating the overall gameplan and deciding upon his first move, the door chime was ringing. He smiled confidantly and said, "Well, they're right on time." Roman began to put on the act and the contest was under way.

John and Marlena stood outside the front door holding hands and John glanced over at her to gauge her reaction to the statement he was about to make, "I'm going to stay with you while you talk to him, Doc. I at least want to be in the same room, okay?"

Hugging him lightly, as if to take some of his strength, she agreed, "Yes, I want you here, John. I need your support to make it through this, honey."

"You've always got that, Marlena. Don't ever forget that." The door opened in the next instant and their eyes landed on a coughing man, doubled over as if in intense pain. Marlena moved to his side in a flash and was guiding him to the couch, all thoughts of reinforcing what John had told him earlier, gone in that second. She hated seeing him sick and in pain, it was as if a part of her was ill too.

As Marlena helped him lie down on the couch, talking to him with her was saying what he wished he could say out loud, "Roman, if this isn't real, we'll figure it out eventually, it won't stop us from getting married." As he considered the possibility, he acknowledged internally that the most difficult aspect of it was that no matter how he raised his suspicions, it was a set-up, pure and simple. It would make him appear petty to be jealous of a sick man. Marlena wouldn't be able to even conceive the idea of her darling former love being so manipulative. She would probably assume John was simply being impatient and possibly somewhat irrationally jealous of her ex-husband which was an excellent start to Roman's plan to break the couple up and reclaim Marlena for himself. It was perfectly designed and practically foolproof to execute, Roman thought to himself while John walked over toward the balcony deep in thought. He knew as he watched John and heard the heavy sigh, that he already had the man on the run. While Marlena was out of the room and the other man's back was turned, he smiled triumphantly. 'I've got you, John. I have only begun and I've already got you running scared. This is going to be so easy!' he said in his mind.

John turned around and Roman quickly put on the mask of weakness and stole a glance over at the man again as Marlena hurried in with the water. John was definitely nervous and fidgety, the tension he was feeling obvious in the tightening muscles of his jaw and the way he couldn't quite seem to stand still. Marlena sat down next to Roman, saying, "Are you allright, Roman, you look a little pale. I'm worried about this situation, maybe we should get you back to the hospital."

"No," he replied firmly. No more hospitals, all I need is rest and...you, Doc. Just having you here with me is making me feel better already," he said sweetly. He took her hand in his and held it tenderly."You give me strength, Doc. You are the best medicine there is."

John stood back saying in his mind, with great suspicion, 'Oh, Roman Brady..if you're milking this thing, so help me, you will regret it...pal.' He watched the two of them, and it was clear that Marlena's heart melted to hear him say those...sickeningly sweet comments about her effect on him. And Roman, well, he was as close to gloating as he could get without being totally obvious. 'If he is faking it, he is good, I gotta give him that.' John decided to call his bluff, "Well, since you're feeling so much better, now that Marlena's here, maybe it's time we all had a little talk."

Before Roman needed to do anything, Marlena jumped in and said firmly, "No, no....he needs to get some rest. We can talk in the morning, John. Let me help you get upstairs, Roman. I think a good night's sleep will do you a world of good." Again, she stared at John with anger about what she perceived to be his very insensitive behavior.

Roman paid her another glowing compliment and John thought he might be sick himself to listen to the man, "You always know what's good for me, Doc. I'm so glad you're here. I don't know what I'd do without you."

John's blood pressure was starting to rise and again he said to himself as he watched them go up the stairs, "You're really laying it on thick, Roman. I swear if this is an act...." He stopped mid-sentence, clenching one fist and blowing into it as an act of tension release. As they reached the balcony, Roman looked down and said with a falsely pleasant tone, "John...sorry we couldn't have that little chat tonight, I'm sure it will all work out for the best though, and we'll talk when the time is right." If he was manipulating, it was hidden well enough that Marlena wasn't going to pick up on it, she cared for the man too much and she hadn't witnessed the conversation between John and Roman. John, however, was a different story and it was almost as if Roman wanted John to know what he was doing, his tone and facial expression almost giving away that he was acting the role of a sick man. Roman seemed to be taunting his rival, wanting John to watch how he was expertly maneuvering himself into position to threaten the relationship between John and Marlena.

It was all so cleverly done, and if Roman had spoken the rest of it out loud he might have answered John's accusatory glance by saying, "Yes, John...I'm acting and there's nothing you can do about it my...friend. If you tell her you think I'm faking, you're going to look like the jealous insecure lover. She won't believe it and you'll be on the outs with her and everyone else as well, it's the first step toward losing her. And, if you push her to tell me there isn't any hope for me with her, I guarantee you it will be you who is seen as the bad guy in this scenario. So, I dare you, John, go ahead and tell her you think I'm pretending to be sick and see what happens. See who ends up all alone out in the cold!'

John went out on to the balcony to think. Blowing out a long exasperated breath as he looked out over the sprawling city, he said, "Oh, Doc...this isn't going to play out smoothly like we hoped it would. I think it's gonna get very ugly before it's over. I pray that when it is we can still be happy together. He's setting me up, I can feel it. I gotta hand it to you, Roman, you're quick on your feet. You came up with a good plan, but it won't work. I'm on to you and I'll catch you when you slip up, I promise you that, my...friend!"

He turned around to see Marlena standing behind him with fire in her eyes and he knew that this was the beginning of some difficult, painful times for them. He steeled himself for her protective fury and said, "So, how's he doing?"

"How's he doing, I should think you could tell from looking at him, John. He's pretty sick right now. How could you do it, John?" she accused.

John wanted to be understanding and patient. He realized that she was under tremendous stress, but he had taken so many setbacks already and endured her hesitation to answer his questions or take action on behalf of their relationship, so this time he just couldn't let her accusatory tone slide. The anger born of being unjustly blamed, of having her make an assumption and not bother to check its validity showed in his voice and was evident from the frown on his face. "Just what is it you think I did, Marlena?" he asked her angrily.

She returned his anger and then some, "You know what, John. You told him about us and now he's much weaker as a result. This is exactly what I was afraid of John! How could you go against my wishes and tell him the truth? He could suffer a serious relapse because of this!"

John stared at her incredulously and said, "So...you think I just came up and heartlessly told him the truth to serve my own needs, is that it, Doc? You think I'm that cruel and selfish?"

Marlena finally realized that she had hurt him and tried to backpeddle, but it was too late, the tone of her voice and the looks she had sent him were etched in his mind already and his heart was wounded. "Well, no...I....just, I'm concerned about his health.You know that, John. And this is why I didn't want to tell him about us, yet."

The pain he felt was evident in his face; he was hurting, but his voice was filled with frustration, "Well....would you like to know how it happened or do you just want to stick with your...assumption about it?"

Seeing that she had definitely mistreated him, she touched him on the arm to capture his eye contact and said apologetically, "I'm sorry if I jumped to conclusions, please...tell me what happened, John."

He nodded, only partly accepting what she said as it really did hurt to have her treat him the way she did, her seering expression from a few minutes earlier flashing repeatedly in his mind. "Marlena, I can't deal with this much longer, I'm sorry he has been so sick, but you aren't responsible for everything that happens to him. He has parents and siblings and children who can help him recover, who can give him the support he seems to need. Why are you the one who has to care for him? Why are we the ones who have to delay our plans and sacrifice our happiness all the time?"

Marlena was taken aback by his seeming change of attitude about the situation, "John, listen to yourself, he almost died just a few days ago! Can't you try to be sensitive to how he feels, can't you have some patience?"

John shut his eyes and took a deep breath and slowly let it out before speaking, trying to contain the strong emotions he was feeling. "Sensitive..you want me to be sensitive and patient. In case you need a reminder, I almost died too...several times over in that God forsaken place trying to get the cure and bring it home so he could live and so everyone who loved him could be happy. And what did I see when I came home? I see you standing in St. Lukes about to marry another man. And then, when we're about to tell him the truth you back out of it. Heck, you didn't just back out, you invited him to stay in *our* home without even asking me first, knowing I didn't have anywhere to go. And, then...you accuse me here tonight with your eyes and now your words that I told him the truth behind your back, like I purposely went against your wishes. Well, I didn't Doc! In case you want to know, it happened by accident!" he said with great intensity as he took a step or two toward the door.

She tried to calm him with another attempt at an apology. Reaching out her hand to stop him, she said, "John...I can see that I've hurt you and I'm sorry. Now, please stay and talk about this with me."

John suddenly felt like he had taken enough for one night; truthfully, he had taken enough, period. Shaking his head, he said, "No, you know what, I'm so tired of this game we've been playing. You can just stay here and wallow in guilt over the affair and take responsibility for his life if you want to, but I'm through with apologizing for loving you, for wanting you to be MY wife!" John had raised his voice to a level which could be overheard and she admonished him, "John..lower your voice, he might hear you."

John stared directly into her eyes and yelled, "I DON'T CARE! I'm not pretending anymore, Doc! He knows the truth, he just has to hear it from you so he can accept it, only you're obviously not ready to do that yet." He looked at her intently, wishing she would finally agree to take a stand for their love and said, "Marlena, I'm tired of waiting, I'm tired of everyone trying to make it seem as if our love is..cheap and dirty!" Grasping her shoulders firmly, he spoke to her with passion, wanting her to agree and do what they planned at the pier earlier, "It's not dirty, Doc! "Our love is so...good, but we could lose it if we keep this up! Can't you see that, Marlena?"

"John! How can you say you don't care, that's a terrible attitude to take when he's so sick! I understand your frustration about the delay, but we have to think of his needs, John. You agreed to that before, why have you changed your mind now?"

Throwing his hands up in utter frustration, realizing on some level that he was playing right into Roman's plan if he indeed was faking the symptoms. Not able to hold back the anger and frustration any longer, John said forcefully, "That's it, Doc, I've had enough! I'm just not going to do this anymore! You come find me when you've told him the truth....whatever that is!" After saying his piece, feeling a combination of fear, anger and relief, he turned away from her and walked swiftly toward the door with purposeful steps.

She was angry now too, and commanded him with her voice, her words and her penetrating gaze, "John Black! Don't you DARE walk out on me!"

Returning her ire, he looked straight through her and countered firmly, "You just watch me, Doc!" He reached the threshold in one long stride and without looking back, he left, slamming the door vigorously on the way out.

"Oh, John," she whispered sadly while shaking her head in disbelief about what had just taken place. Marlena stood there dumbfounded; she hadn't seen him that frustrated and angry in a long time and their heated exchange left her wondering what would become of their relationship and at the same time she was questioning her own actions for the first time since Roman had returned during the wedding ceremony. Unfortunately, she didn't have much time to contemplate her part in the pain and frustration John had so clearly expressed, before her attention was purposely redirected.

Roman stood on the balcony, out of the line of sight. His fist was raised in a victorious clench and he said quietly, "Yes, that's exactly what I wanted to have happen tonight. It couldn't have gone better if I had written the scene myself. Way to go, Doc! It's only a matter of time." He headed quietly toward the bedroom, and upon arriving, he made some noises to indicate that he was in distress; she came running to his side, just as he hoped she would. 'It's all going according to my plans,' he thought as she tucked him gently back into bed.