suicide

Suicide and Suicide Prevention

(As I have said before I am NOT a medical professional, if you are suicidal, call 1-800-999-9999, 911 or your local emergency room, or go to your local emergency room for help!!)

Cliches that make sense if you think about it and are the last thing you want to hear:

1. "Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary situation".
2. "Suicide occurs when pain exceeds the resources for coping with the pain" (in this case you are supposed to be able to decrease the pain, or increase your coping skills)
3.   "Suicide never brings the relief you so desparately seek, if you are dead, you will not be around to feel the relief."
4.    " He/She wasn't serious, they only took x amount of pills"
5.    " It's just a cry for help".
6.    "The person only does this to get attention".
There are many more of these sayings, cliches and myths....these are only a few, if there are any you would like to see posted here, please
submit them to me by email (at the bottom ot the page).

Just in case you're curious, here are MY answers to the above:
1. Sometimes the situation IS permanent or goes on for so long that it seems permanent.
2. Well, what do I do about the pain while I am trying to get the resouces to deal with it...and where do I get them anyway?
3. Maybe there's relief and maybe there isn't, but sometimes not feeling anything at all seems better.
4. This is serious. Period. Get a grip.
5. Well, if it's a cry for help, obviously I NEED help, so HELP ME!!!
6. If I was doing this just for attention, I would walk outside naked or any number of things that would draw attention to myself. If I had to choose how to get attetion, this would not be the choice.

Like I said these are MY opinions and I am just sharing them as part of my journey, and in case anyone else out there feels the same way, or has their own defeating answer to theses statements.

More about Me

As far as my personal experience. I have tried several serious suicide attempts. I have gone to the hospital for most of them. Why I am still here is a mystery to me. I guess God has a plan that He has not revealed to me yet or something. Anyway, I just wanted you to know that I have struggled with this issue and still struggle with it on a daily basis. My biggest problem with being Bipolar is the depression, not the mania. My last attempt was 12/31/98. At that time, I began to realize how harmful my actions were to others. They were actually ANGRY with me. Me being in a state of helplessness and hopelessness, and that's when the most important people in my life (my psychiatrist and my husband) became angry and started threatening me. My psychiatrist probably won't hang in there with me through another attempt, and my Husband, who is the sweetest man in the world, told me in no uncertain terms that if I attempt again he is going to leave me. THAT scared me. Other people who have not felt this pain do not understand it and how it can throw logic and reason out the door.

Yet, I go on day after day trying to remember that suicide is often not successful and I do not want to be a vegetable or locked in an institution for the rest of my life, because that would probably be even worse and even harder on those who love me. Suicide is a very selfish act. It robs your friends and your family of you, and you are more important than anyone will probably ever tell you. I have been having a lot of talks with ny best friends recently and they have turned into boo-hooing fests on both ends of the phone, I had no idea what an impact I have had of other people. That still doesn't keep me from thingking about "it" but it keeps me aways from the pills and the sharp objects--one moment at a time.
Because sometimes you have to crawl before you can walk and sometimes you have to take things a minute at a time. And eventually the minutes will add up to hours and days and weeks and months without hurting yourself. That said, this section about me is done; if you want more info, please email me.

Organizations and SItes that may be able to help or provide more information:

Save----------Suicide Awareness\Voices of Education
(Mostly a resource for survivors of suicide and to make people aware of suicidal behavior and warning signs)

"If You Are Thinking of Suicide: Read This first"
(For anyone thinking about suicide, a good place to visit and to get helpful information and links)