Read What Others Have Shared
(August 1998)

There Is Hope In Knowing That You Are Not Alone

August 28, 1998
From: David Bromberg
E-mail: BomanyD@aol.com

I am 14 years old and have been taking medication for depression since I was 12. It started when I got panic attacks. My kind of depression, I found out, was not only making me mope, it made me very nervous. If I went out to a fancy restaurant, I would sometimes get sick from how rich the food was. But after I started taking the medicine, my life became a lot better. The best thing was that I could go out to restaurants. And my family noticed another thing which I didn't. I was joyful and happy. I went around singing (constantly annoying my family). God had blessed me by making my before dismal life happy. Not surprisingly, I began taking the medication and my life became better only one year after I was saved by our Lord Jesus Christ. And that year, and the year after, I went to the same camp where I was saved and pledged my life to Jesus Christ. I also made many important spiritual decisions the year after. I had by then began to use my limited skills in making we bpages with HTML to make a site where others could come to learn and express testimony by our Lord Jesus Christ. You can visit my website if you like at http://geocities.datacellar.net/Athens/Aegean/2603. Jesus has helped me a lot in my life, and even though I will never live up to his expectations, I am eternally grateful to Him.

August 20, 1998
From: Maria
E-amil: Marbillj@aol.com

Hi, I'm a 34 year old mother of two who suffers from post-partum depression. I got the depression after I had my second daughter 2 1/2 years ago. It wasn't diagnosed until three months after I gave birth to her because the only symptom I had was severe insomnia so eventually I got hooked on ambien which were sleeping pills. The crying came after my daughter started with hers (colic) and she didn't stop until her 5th month. I was always unhappy with my marriage even before I had my children but I'm Catholic and a strong believer of marriage. Once my depression had been diagnosed and we started to go to marriage counseling and I was put on Prozac, I began to slowly come out of my depression. Thanks to my faith in Jesus Christ. I remember praying to him during my worst times of my depression (when I couldn't even stand to hear my baby cry). I asked him to give me strength so that I could be a decent mother to my children. All I wanted to do was be able to take care of my children myself and now that's exactly what I'm doing now. I have changed so much now because of my illness. My faith in God is greater than it has ever been and I thank him many, many times for the strength he has given me. Now my oldest daughter will be making her 1st communion and I know I will cry when I see her in her beautiful white dress and veil. But these will be tears of joy not of sorrow. The poem Footprints in the Sand gave me alot of inspiration. "The Lord replied, "My precious, precious child, I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you."

To those of you who suffer so much now, please seek help through a therapist or psychiatrist. Depression is a chemical imbalance and is treatable just as diabeties is treatable. I had to change my meds so many times to find the right combination. It is something I live through everyday and I do still get bad days but I know tomorrow is another day and that I might have a better day. Take it one day at a time....

Love and Peace to All

August 13, 1998
From: Jan
E-mail: howjan@worldnet.att.net

I first knew I was depressed in August 1994. I told my son's Dr. that I must talk to him about something. He recommened I go see a counselor. I did. I was so desperate. I had been having panic/anxiety attacks for months. So, I had no idea which came FIRST??? My medical Dr. gave me Paxil to take in October of '94 but the psychologist did not feel I needed to depend on medicine. I did not go to a Christian counselor tho she said she was a Christian. The 4 visits I had with her helped. BUT, nothing helped me more than continuing to TRUST IN JESUS & call out to him in the middle of the night when I was so afraid. "What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." And Phil. 4:13 became my guiding verse. I knew the verse well, but it would keep me going. I gave my husband verses to pray for me on his lunch hour. I began taking the Paxil in January '95 and within a few weeks I knew I was going to have that CHANGE I'd been looking for.... Do not be afraid of taking ! a prescription your Dr. has given you. Be sure he listens. Mine checked my thyroid and blood sugar to rule out anything else. There had been many "trying situations" go on the previous 3 years the death of my Mom and my husband's and responsibility laid heavily on me. So? I took Paxil for about 9 months and felt I was ready to go off. I stayed off it for another 9 months and as soon as I felt those "same old" feelings creeping in and hanging around I combined the healing prayers with my bible study friends and once again took Paxil. I went off it in April of this year again. I just trust the Lord to take me past that one day and should it come back in full force??? I shall remember to Look to HIM first and IF necessary - it is alright and DOES NOT SHOW A LACK OF FAITH by taking a "pill". And, IF you need counseling on a "one on one" basis - go to a good Christian counselor who KNOWS ABOUT depression. And may the Lord touch and bless each one who reads this and be H EALED of it and BELIEVE the results do bring you closer to HIM. "His ways are not our ways...." AMEN! - Love, Jan

August 4, 1998
From: Suzie
E-mail: mstew@intrstar.net

Its like a prison and I cant find a key to unlock the door.
That I can just pick my self up and feel better.
That its not something I choose to feel, and its not something I want to feel, its a part of me
Smile you will feel better, its all in your head, stuff like this really hurts my feelings.
ICQ me or email I dont do very well with forms
2826272

August 3, 1998
From: Edie
E-mail: wingz_86@yahoo.com

Depression for me was the feeling that no one loved me. That I was alone in this world. That there was nothing after death no afterlife no heaven or hell. Just nothing. I couldn't stop crying. I wanted my husband just to hold me and never let me go cause that was the only thing that held me together most times. It was a horrible feeling. And still is. I quit my job because of it. I went to work one day and I just got this overwhelming feeling of wanting to be home, having to get home or something dreadful would happen. I started crying and didn't want to cry at work of course. So I went to my supervisor and said I need to go home and left. Thank goodness I had a supervisor who understood depression. Otherwise it would have looked really weird. I knew after that day I needed help to get my life back together. I went to phychiatrist and he told me about how depression happens. I don't to this day know why it started or what triggered it. All I know is I thank God for Prozac. I s! till every once in a while get that feeling but it doesn't last as long as it did. One thing that hurt me at first was that I felt like I couldn't pray. I felt hurt that God didn't take it right away. But then after going to the dr I realized it was an illness. I felt like Job saying okay Lord what did I do to deserve this. I kept thinking back to things I might have needed to repent of. And like Job's friends there are people who think you can just snap out of it and get over it. But it doesn't work that way. One thing I would like people to realize is that no one wants to feel this way. It goes deeper than being sad. There is an emptiness that can't be filled. There is no enjoyment in your life anymore. The things I used to like didn't bring satisfaction anymore.

I hated my life and what it had become. I couldn't stand to be away from my husband. When he went to work I felt like part of me left with him. I thank God I had a wonderful husband who stood by me even when I do and say something crazy in the middle of the depression. It hasn't been an easy road but it has been a learning experience for me. I have learned that I can't deal with stress as much as I used to. And that I can't bottle up my feelings like I used to either. I think that is part of the reason for my depression. But with God's help I am muddling through it. At least now I can smile again and face a new day.

Thank you for letting me share my story.

August 2, 1998
From: Gina
E-mail: Anig18@aol.com

Hi, I have had depression for nearly 4 years. Each day counts because each day hurts. Right after I got saved at 14, is when God put many many trials on my heart. My close grandmother passed away, my brother almost commited suicide and went to rehab for 3 weeks, my uncle died, aunt died, and great aunt died. Much more happend, but no need to go into details. I have made several suicide attempts...none worked. God gave me the talent to draw and write what I was feeling. Doing art relaxed me more and released alot of tension. I am THANKFUL more then ever, that God gave me such a cool talent. I am 17 now, and on anti-depressants, but wont take them. If my depression goes away, then so will the creativity. One of my most depressing pieces, made it into the museum. If you have a God given talent, DONT ignore it. USE it...it may one day save your life. Thanks.