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Pandering to Whom? By Master Vinker March 18, 1999 Larry Flynt, wellknown publisher of Hustler magazine, is currently on trial in Cincinnati where he was charged a year ago April with pandering. The charge was brought after a fourteen year old boy bought explicit, sexual videos from Hustler Store on 6th Street in Cincinnati's downtown core. Jimmy Flynt, the millionaire publisher's brother, is doing well as he manages a brisk business in this ultra conservative city. It is nigh unto impossible in all but limited areas in the city's western industrial areas. Finding magazines as tame as Playboy is tough in most of Cincinnati. Does the store pander? The youth involved in the incident reports acting on behalf of municipal officials eager to charge a man who stands on First Amendment rights. Flynt and his brother are seeking dismissal of all charges, and yet at the same time have taken steps to incite City Council. Last Spring the Flynts mailed post cards to city officials that featured penises with city sites in the background. BDSM No Longer an Alternative This ezine, alt.com, bondage.com and zillions others generally attest to BDSM as an alternative lifestyle. At very least it is seen by most as a variant set of sexual interests. Not so in Brazil where BDSM is decidedly out of the closet and finding its way into the mainstream. Brazil beaches were already well known for easy clothing policies. Tongs and topless suits are normal there, as are they in sandy beaches around the globe. In preparation for Carnival, Tathiana, a Brazilian starlet, has shown that it is not only nudity that is becoming socially acceptable. She is filmed during her regular television show wearing mask and dominatrix . Men vie for attention as they eagerly remove articles of clothing to serve her. Is it the Internet??? After months online developing a sexual relationship, French woman Julie Yasa traveled thousands of miles to visit her lover in Detroit, where things did not work out. Her lover had phoned police on Wednesday to report seeing a dead woman in the park across from his home. It was she. The death by suicide has been alleged to be a direct result of the Internet on which they enjoyed a steamy romance. Others note that she was not mentally well balanced. Many have noted the lack of concern by the man for her. Reports in AP news regard him as cruel. Kosher Sex Judaism's attitudes to sexuality are generally considered more liberal than most other Western religions. This became particularly clear when Orthodox rabbi Shmuel Boteach wrote the bestseller "Kosher Sex: A Recipe for Passion and Intimacy." The good rabbi has been featured on numerous talk shows, and was the subject of an interview on NBC's Today show on St. Patty's Day, March 17. Excerpts have appeared in Playboy magazine. Who would imagine an Orthodox Jew to be the spokesmen for sensuality? Last But Not Least Counting on a European vacation. Aficionados have spoken highly of the prostitutes in the Low Countries, particularly the Netherlands and Denmark. Still, until recently prostitution was illegal in the land of Hans Christian Andersen. No longer. A new law passed by the Danish parliament has legalized the privilege of paying to be screwed. D/s Relationships: Online, Real Life and Long Distance By Harts_ravensmyst March 9, 1999 In our community of online D/s relationships it is not unusual for Dominants and submissives to meet real life and continue their relationship long distance. As our community grows it becomes more and more prevalent. By way of introduction, I am the real life and online submissive of MasterStoneHart. We have managed to maintain our D/s relationship in tact long distance, even though we live over 2000 miles apart with a three hour time difference. It has been over a year since my journey into this lifestyle began and I have been collared to MasterStoneHart from the beginning. Learning to cope with distance, online time management, real life issues and a yearning heart allows for a continuing successful experience. But, in all honesty, it is not an easy path to follow as many issues must be addressed that are not involved if a Dominant and submissive are real life but not long distance and/or online. It seems the basis of continued growth of any online, real life and long distance relationship is mutual trust and commitment to see that the relationship stays grounded. This type of commitment takes time and energy and a willingness to flow with the ups and downs of any relationship and accept changes as real life intrudes from time to time with life's problems. For some change is not an easy thing to accept, but if the core of the relationship is stable and worthwhile, a true bonding, then all things are possible. The word devotion comes to mind as the relationship experiences the reality of being long distance and real life. Learning to cope with the fact that you will not be real life with your Dominant as many days, even months, pass can be very straining and difficult. Learning to handle the stress of this type of relationship is half the battle. Coping with the yearning to fulfill the need to submit real life is one of the hardest parts of any D/s online, long distance and real life relationship. The grind of coming online and keeping a constant flow of communication between dominant and submissive becomes quite stressful as time passes and life disrupts the status quo. Having the energy and focus to stay committed to maintaining the relationship becomes paramount in its success. A willingness to be available online when perhaps other real life circumstances need your attention places a drain on the bond previously established. Finding an acceptable balance that satisfies both parties lends to success as both have needs, desires and wants that obviously need to be fulfilled and addressed. In my experience as a submissive, it takes a deep dedication to maintain this type of relationship month after month. The constant yearning that a submissive feels to be in the Dominant's presence once real life has been tasted is truly one of the hardest parts of enduring the online and long distance experience. Since the emotional and physical needs become stronger for the submissive as time passes. Finding a way to satisfy those needs constructively is part of the struggle. As your devotion and submission passes through various levels, your needs whether physical or emotional, can change and become stronger as deeper levels of submission are embraced. Loving and submitting to someone far away places a stress on you that can be unequaled in emotional terms. Finding a balance seems to be a key ingredient in sustaining a positive and healthy outlook that encourages continued growth and development. Part of that balance is based on trust, honor, and commitment, very important parts of the D/s relationship. The honor of both Dominant and submissive in upholding the boundaries of the relationship is paramount to holding any D/s relationship together, but the distance and the fact you are real life places an additional burden on both parties. Trusting your partner that they will uphold and honor the boundaries set in the relationship, whatever they maybe, is part of the glue that cements the ability to withstand the distance and yearning that develops in the relationship. Each relationship is different as to the boundaries the parties agree upon, but upholding those boundaries help ensure the trust between the parties flourishes. Trusting that your Dominant or submissive will adhere to the foundations of the relationship and not waver in their commitment is critical. It is very easy to be dishonorable and step outside the relationship and break the boundaries previously set between the parties. Thereby destroying the trust previously established and starting the long descent into destroying the core of the bond. Trust being key to our lifestyle as without it dominance and submission would not be impossible. We have all heard stories and know of others that have stepped outside the boundaries they established in their relationship by those online. Being dishonorable by lying, using other nics and having more than one Dominate or submissive without the other parties knowledge or agreement destroys all trust and is very hurtful. So the issue of honor, or being worthy, plays a very important role in the success of this type of relationship. Sometimes, it is amazing when you discuss this issue with others online and they fail to see the deep emotional involvement that develops online. Focusing your attention for hours, weeks and months on one person opens your heart in ways that are unique to the online experience. As the relationship proceeds a special bond and trust develops and the issue of being honorable with your partner becomes more important. The emotional bond can become very real and deep. Part of the online experience is the phenomenon of getting to know your dominant or submissive from the inside first since there is no real life physical contact. You are exposed to that person's personality first without physical judgments and you connect in a way that is not possible if you meet someone in real life offline. The fact that you are communicating behind a computer screen lends an air of openness since you feel protected. After all you can just turn your computer off and stop. But, as most know that is much easier said than done. The speed at which a D/s relationship can grow and deepen online is something that has to be experienced to be understood. It is very possible to be involved deeply before you realize how much emotion has been invested thereby making it very difficult to just turn off your computer and step back. Also you have the added burden of finding time and money to visit your Dominant or submissive. If you have been involved in such a long distance relationship, you know the effort necessary to stay committed by planning visits whenever possible and real life allows. It can become very expensive to visit your partner whether you are driving or flying. Expenses for airfare, automobile, meals, hotels or whatever else is planned can limit the number of visits and the length of the visit between Dominate and submissive. There is also the question of time. Finding the time to actually travel by taking off from work or using vacation time places another limit on visits. Plus you have the additional responsibility of managing your home life especially if children are involved or other family members. All these burdens place additional strains on the relationship. In conclusion, as a submissive that has experienced the full scope of such a D/s relationship being online, long distance and real life, I feel it can be very rewarding and satisfying. Even though admittedly, it can at times be difficult to withstand the changes and problems unique to the experience. But placing your trust in the relationship and being committed and having resolve can bring much happiness, as it can be very fulfilling and a truly rewarding experience. Some in our community have managed to successfully turn their online, long distance relationship real life 24/7 making the online experience even more rewarding. There are many issues involved in our lifestyle pertaining to being online, long distance and real life which can't be addressed in a single article. Other issues will be addressed in subsequent articles and it is hoped this brief discussion will shed some light on the scope of issues that need to be explored. BDSM in the courts One very controversial case that has made headlines many times in the past few years is the case of Oliver Javanovic, who was convicted of kidnapping, sexual abuse, and assault. He was sentenced to 15 years to life in state prison. After corrosponding via email and internet chat rooms, with a woman who has for the most part been left unnamed, a meeting was arranged. Testifying under oath, the woman stated that they met, had dinner and returned to Javanovic's apartment, she removed her clothing and consented to being tied to his futon. She testified that this was followed by 20 hours of torture, including hot wax, biting, beatings, and sodomy, during which she shouted her 'safe word' several times. One of the major issues in the trial, was that email correspondence between the two, was not admitted into court as evidence. This would have been a large part of Jovanovic's defense had it been allowed. On the stand, the victim said her email was "nonsense...a joke" and she denied discussing s/m with him at all. She claimed to have learned the phrase 'safeword' from reading a pamphlet on the topic. Jovanovic retains his innocence, stating that he did not kidnap her, she came and left at her own free will, and that what happened was not only consensual, but it was she who requested it. He also said that if there were a video recording of the night that she would not be here, because she fabricated all of the charges. Some quotes from some of her emails, have turned up on various sites, for example here is a quote from one letter she wrote to Jovanovic. "[My boyfriend] was a sadomasochist and now I'm his sex slave and it's painful. But the fun of telling my friends 'Hey, I'm a sadomasochist' more than outweighs the torment." In another e-mail, she said "I'm what those happy pain fiends at the Vault [an S&M club] call a pushy bottom," a term used to describe someone who is sexually submissive. For more information about this case, you can find information at the following links: Psychology Today - Cybersex; trail shows post-modern courtship as reflected in e-mail exchanges Wall Street Journal:Don't Shield Juries From The Truth in Sex Cases New York Daily News:Crimes and Punishment Doctors Rebut Accuser in Internet Torture Trial Drakar's sweetemotion Febuary 26, 1999 Here is a story I got in the e-mail today and decided to post it since it involves a similar topic of our headlines and I thought everyone would wish to read it and perhaps help out. -Mistress of Despair BDSM Problems in the Poconos by: Carter Stevens As many of you may know, since rumors are flying around the Internet already, our spring Spanking only and spring fetish parties (which we have been doing for 8 years now with no incidents) may have to be canceled due to illegal pressure placed upon the resort where we have held our last 4 parties, which has caused them to withdraw their venue even though they did NOT want to. The supervisors of the township and the head of the Pocono Vacations Bureau started a personal vendetta against our groups enjoying the same rights of other US citizens to peaceably assemble and intimidated the resort with veiled threats and pressure to cause them to give up the income from 4 sold out weekends per year (which would represent almost 10% of their total yearly revenue). At the very least this is extortion and sex discrimination (they wouldn't have tried this if we were a gay group). To make things worse the publicity from the libelous and obviously biased articles (no one ever ran "amok" at any of our parties) have already caused several other resorts to turn us down as a replacement venue. You all know I'm an outspoken (some would say too outspoken) defender of personal rights and I immediately approached several lawyers about taking action against this discriminatory misuse of public power and trust. Most of them only had to hear how much this action has crippled us financially before explaining how expensive such an undertaking would be and how much they would need per hour (in advance, of course) before taking on the local government. However, I'm very happy to report that Jerome Mooney of Salt Lake City (one of the bestknown and very top rated 1st amendment lawyers in the US) agrees we have a case and has signed on to file suit against these petty bureaucrats. (perhaps even a federal civil rights action). However, this is a big undertaking for us alone and we need other groups and individuals to sign on to the suit and lend their support and efforts in fighting this round about method of oppression. Please read over the attachedarticles and if you agree with our side and wish to help us in our fight please publicize this matter throughout your organizations and publications. If you or your group wish to join us in our fight please contact me at CarterS@aol.com or Jerome Mooney at jmooney@mooneylaw.com. Thank you for your consideration in this matter, Carter Stevens Febuary 26, 1999 We will post updates on our progress on our websites, as they become available: www.spankingparty.com www.fetishfling.com Addresses for letters in reaction to this incident are as follows: The Pocono Mountains Vacation Bureau (PMVB),whose executive director is Robert Uguccioni, is at pocomts@poconos.org. The Poconos Township government and Pat Ross, I have no address for. The reporter (Birkbeck) who wrote the story address is mbirkbeck@poconorecord.com
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