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Dirty Jokes

Short Dirty Jokes - Sexy Pickup Lines


Short Dirty Jokes


Sexy Pickup Lines

  • I want to melt in your mouth, not in your hands.

  • Can I borrow a quarter? ["What for?"] I want to call my mom and tell her that I just met the girl of my dreams.
    [OR]
    I want to call your mom and thank her.

  • Is your dad a thief? ["No."] Then how did he steal the sparkle of the stars and put it in your eyes? (Be ready with a snappy response in case they say "Yes.")

  • You're so hot, you melt the elastic in my underwear.

  • Would you be my love buffet? So I can lay you out on the table and take what I want?

  • Let's go to my place and do the things I'll tell everyone we did anyway.

  • The word of the day is "legs". Let's go back to my place and spread the word.

  • You must be tired. ["Why?"] You were running through my dreams all night.

  • That outfit would look great crumpled in a heap on my bedroom floor.

  • My name's [state your name]. That's so you know what to scream.

  • My name's [state your name], but you can call me "Lover."

  • Nice shoes. Wanna fuck?

  • What do you say we go out for pizza and then a fuck? ["No."] You don't like pizza? (Be ready with a snappy response in case they say "Okay.")

  • Can I flirt with you?

  • Your dad must've been a Baker, 'cause you got a nice set of buns.

  • Look at his/her shirt tag. When they say, "What are you doing?", you say "Checking to see if you were made in heaven".

  • All those curves, and me with no brakes.

  • If I told you that you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?

  • Fuck me if I'm wrong, but don't you want to kiss me?

  • [Grab his/her ass.] Pardon me, is this seat taken?

  • Is it hot in here or is it just you?

  • Can you give me directions? ["To where?"] Your heart.

  • If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.

  • How 'bout you sit on my lap, and we'll see what pops up.

  • Do you know what would look good on you? Me.

  • I miss my teddy bear. Would you sleep with me?

  • How 'bout you and I go back to my place and get out of these wet clothes.

  • [Tap your thigh.] You just think this is my leg.

  • Say, that's a nice [dress/outfit/shirt/article of clothing]. Can I talk you out of it?

  • I lost my phone number. Can I have yours?

  • I hope you know CPR 'cause you take my breath away.

  • Excuse me, is that semen in your hair?

  • My face is leaving in 15 minutes. Be on it.


  • The top 51 worst pick up lines
    Created: 5/9/97

    Updated: 6/27/97 1