(Wednesday) "They buried me in that great tomb that knows no sound"
I'm not sure if I mentioned the other band that uses our rehearsal space. I think I did. I've been thinking of a good way to get them back, and my automatic answer was...laxatives.
Oh, sure you've never wanted to cause loose bowel movements in a person you disliked. Just like you regularly talk to aliens, right? So don't even pretend to get outraged. My problem was this: how to get them to take the laxatives? Most people aren't too cooperative when you go up to them and say, "Here, eat this." Especially if you don't really know them.
So, I combined my knowledge of laxatives with my knowledge of stoners (they had a bag of pot sitting right out in the open last time we saw them), and came up with the perfect solution....chocolate covered pretzels! See, they make laxatives that are chocolate-like. As long as you don't melt them at too high a temperature, you can use them like chocolate, especially if you mix them with real chocolate to disguise their stale flavor. Dip pretzels in this melted chocolate/laxative mix and viola! Perfect stoner food for the hated band.
I might even exert some effort and put it in a professional package or something. We'll see. First I have to get the laxatives. I've got chocolate in abundance from Christmas.
Dirk and I found a new music store in Springfield. It's called Mars. I swear, it's guitar heaven. Gear heaven, really. It's the size of a department store, and full of musical instruments of all sorts. Dirk was practically crying when I led him away to meet with 'Bert at two.
I've missed 'Bert. We went to Bobbie's with him for lunch, then went to Best Buy. I bought a Harry Chapin CD I've been meaning to get for a long time, The Dance Band on the Titanic--trust me, it was out decades before that gross little movie was made. Dirk got a few CDs -- Bad Religion, The Queers. And 'Bert, for reasons known only to 'Bert, bought a Pere Ubu album he's never heard (he's never even heard the band) and a Smashing Pumpkins CD that he's heard two songs from and hated.
We have plans set for next Wednesday, assuming 'Bert doesn't forget. Larvae wasn't brought up. I assume she's a sore subject for 'Bert, and niether Dirk nor I was going to mention her. As a side note, Dirk tried to call her a month or so ago, and it turns out that she was hospitalized because she passed out/went into a coma from overdoing the inhalants (she does Glade). She's in detox, the last we heard.
I don't understand how anyone can do inhalants...the high you get is caused by your brain cells dying, en masse. That's disgusting. You need all the brain cells you can get, right?
(Thursday) I just signed up for an HTML course with the HTML Writers' Guild. I caved. I'm sorry. I just couldn't see puttering around with the basic HTML knowledge I've managed to pick up on my own indefinitely. I don't think I'll ever be down with that frames bullshit, though. I can't stand 'em, sorry.
I didn't want to get up and go to work today. I never do, but it hurt more than usual today. I just wanted to crawl back under the covers until the New Year was over. I feel much better now.
I'm stuck here at work until 3, thanks to Alex being so hell bent on going home early. Honestly, that young man is a bastard, and a prime candidate for the laxative treatment. But my supervisor is praising me for being professional (in my Hard Rock Café T-Shirt, no less), so I'm sitting here and sucking it up. The rest of the office is leaving as I type this.
Crystal Geisha. Astigmatism is a horrible affliction. You see so many marvelous things that turn out to be unreal. Crystal Geisha = Crystal Geyser. I like Crystal Geisha...if I ever re-name the site, I think I'll name it Crystal Geisha.
(Saturday) Well, it's been an incredibly eventful week-end.
On Thursday night, Dirk and I partied at Katie's house! It's the best New Year I've ever had. It was just me, Dirk, Katie, and Chris. Katie's mom bought us three bottles of strawberry zinfandel. I brought some vodka, and Dirk brought beer.
Dirk had to work until nine, so we postponed the festivities until we'd picked him up from work. Then, we ate some food and broke out the liquor. Dirk got a head start, because he was downing the beer with dinner. Katie and I were drinking the strawberry zinfandel while we all played Dirty Minds. Katie and Chris, being far more sober than Dirk and I, were kicking our asses. I think. We weren't really playing the game right, just taking turns reading clues to each other. Katie, unfortunately, was sick, and Chris can't drink. About when Katie started getting drowsy, I decided that the strawberry zinfandel wasn't doing much for me.
I'd had the better part of a bottle, and was only mildly buzzed. So, I broke out my supply of vodka (filched from my parent's bottles), and started pouring myself shots. Until I got too drunk to pour them myself. Then Chris played bartender for me. I remember dancing several times, and falling on the floor, giggling. I also remember becoming hugely enamoured with these model boats Katie has in her living room. And singing drunkenly along to "Pale Blue Eyes". Chris kept calling me "Princess Skatter". Dirk was collapsing all over the place and telling people he loved them.
Eventually, Dirk and I crawled upstairs to our own amusements and left Katie and Chris in the living room. We crashed out on the floor of Katie's guest room about twenty minutes before Katie's mom and company came home. The floor was kind of evil to Dirk's back, and he woke up with a massive back ache. The air mattress that Katie and Chris were on wasn't much kinder to them. I think I was the only one who slept well, thanks to my trials and tribulations with the Hiking and Camping Nightmare.
My mother never ceases to amaze me. Out of the blue, on New Year's day, she started questioning me about my grades. She called my bluff by threatening to call the school to find them out. Oooh, but she was mad when I told her how badly I'd done.
As usual, she demanded to know why I did so badly. This time, however, she didn't get an answer. I told her it was none of her fucking business, since I'd paid for the classes, and I wasn't going to tell her. And I informed her that I planned to move out at the nearest opportunity. She went ballistic. "Are you sexually active?" I told her it wasn't any of her business. "Is that why you failed, because you're sexually active with Dirk?"
So, I quit being nice. I told her that she had no right to ask me these questions, and I pointed out that I never asked if she and my father still screwed. I got in her face, a lot, and told her I'd rather die than continue to live with her. I told her exactly what I thought about the way she treats my father and me, and exactly how much respect I had for her opinion of Dirk. I used a tone of voice I've never dared use with her before...sarcastic, angry, mocking. And when she hit me with what usually makes me break down completely, when she told me how disappointed she was in me, I just fucking walked away.
And waited for her to find me.
Eventually, she came and asked me to come out of my room, saying we needed to talk. The only thing she really asked was that I not move in with Dirk right away. In return, I don't have to drag my ass through college this semester, and I pay rent. I also get the car, pay the insurance, and pay the repairs.
She even offered to deal with my father's expected disappointment for me. She kept telling me that the reason she'd stayed with him was "emotional blackmail", and kept warning me that Dirk would do the same to me.
But I got what I wanted. I'm going to get the car, be able to save up to move out, and get the hell out of this nightmare.
Today was ugly. We canceled practice because of inclement weather (the fucking ice didn't start until eight!), and I went over to Dirk's to play chess. Aaron picked me up. He's done a really great job of fixing up his mustang. He pointed out that this was the first time he'd driven me anywhere since back when we were in driver's ed together.
I'm better at Chess than I thought I was...I only knew how to move the pieces. The game ended in a draw after I took all but two of Dirk's pieces off the board. He only got four of mine. We ordered pizza, and I left at eight.
Things are very quiet at my house right now. I'm loving this. They're leaving me alone.
Happy New Year, everyone!!! I love all of you!!!