My Brother, and Genocide

MY LIFE ...as of 4th April...

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Ayy... Hi~!

    Its another Saturday....~....another violin lesson scraped through...another week trudged through...another another another another. All the way through, doesn't stop, doesn't change much either. *sigh*
    It really feels like life/time is just sliding past. Nothing has happened in the past few weeks that could qualify them as a few weeks, rather than just one incredibly long stretch of similar time.
    Thing is, it'll end soon enough. one more week of copying notes, attempting tutorials, making polite small talk with my classmates, the odd joke, just getting along, getting on with it...and the easter week-long hols are here! The perfect place to start getting back on track. Have i mentioned i haven't been doing my hmwork? haha. i have NO idea wht the heck is going on in chem and i don't care much, except i have to and that sucks.
    But i'll quit with the griping. i feel sooo lethargic. yeargh. Nevermind. Tonight, there's Basic Instinct on tv!!!! guess who's not watching? aaaahhhhhhhh. (!) my incredibly brainless brother is watching Stargate (The Series) on tv now, and its far faaar worse than the original movie. I cant believe they dared to even Think about making a series out of it. its excruciating sitting through it since every 5 minutes, you get the insatiable urge to pull out the pathetic actors and strangle them. what's more painful is when its not just your brother who wants to watch it, but your mother as well. No wonder tv shows suck, some people actually like them. *sigh*.

(this tv set is supposed to be flashing images, but it gets unplugged.)     Anyway, those of you who have siblings, esp bratty younger brothers, might know that as siblings, you grow up together, and you develop issues along the way that u discard accordingly as you mature. Siblinghood is far more mature than marriage. You hate each other to death but you still live together and still protect each other. No cop out like divorce. I don't know why. Recently, my brother and i developed territorial issues over the remote control. I wanted to watch Mad about You, and he? trying to prove his domination over the remote, insisted on snatching it away, and Just Because I wanted to watch That show, decided to insist on watching the incredibly insipid Australia's Funniest Home Videos. ARGH. The little Twerp just sat on the plastic black control with that defiant, knowingly victorious look on his flat face, and i REALLY wanted to beat him up there and then. But NOoooo, my parents were watching and I tell you, they're completely gutless parents with no sense of justice. For Sheesh. They've been waiting 14 years for my brother to grow up and it hasn't happened. Then when i regress to immaturity to deal with him, everything is My fault. I swear my brother is such an incredibly ridiculous piece of work. He refuses to eat anything slightly interesting, he doesn't eat peas, carrots, stems, anything that looks like a vegetable, anything with pepper or similar black dots, anything with chilli, anything remotely spicy, basically anything except rice, noodles, boiled chicken and fried egg. I can't Wait for him to go to NS. Unfortunately, when my parents leave to go back to s'pore, I'll be stuck here with him. living in the same place as him. And all realistically speaking, doing all the cleaning, cleaning up after him, cleaning up his messes, his junk, and his inordinate lack of any sense of responsibility. He has 2 years to grow up. If not, i declare i'll move in with a friend. He can live in his own filthy sty and grow fungus in the toilet for all i care. Im not his mother.
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    Ah now...back to my back-breaking lethargy again... ahhhhhh....i probably should tell you about something other than myself..*hrm*...think think... oh yes, there was this video i watched during english, which was interesting, learnt something new. This was about the aborigines. Most people are far from aware from the fact that genocide occurred here. It was serious stuff, they even compared it to the holocaust, except that it hasn't received as much coverage.
    I don't remember exactly what started it, but the early settlers, the criminals, fought a war with the aborigines, and since they were using guns with an unfair advantage, they obviously won with 10 aborigines to every white man killed. After that, there was a huge pogrom-like thing where they tried to 'eradicate' the aborigines from the land they'd lived on for more than 40 000 years, longer than europeans had been in europe even. They succeeded in killing almost all of the tasman aborigines, and this is so surely genocide.
    Later on, they put the remaining aborigines into restricted areas, where they fell prey to alcohol and all sorts of epidemics and venereal diseases passed from the white men. Then from there onwards, im not too sure of the chronological following of events, but the government tried a program of assimilation, whereby they took the children of aborigines and put them with 'white' families as labourers to learn the 'ways of the 'white'. This was also an attempt to wipe out their race by inter-breeding, since, if im not wrong, the genes for aboriginal characteristics tend to be reccessive. This spawned what is called the 'stolen generation'.
    Right now, the prime minister has been unable to apologise to the 'stolen generation' for the injustice put upon them. There have been bills that tried to give back to the aborigines some land rights, and recently, Howard(the pm) has been trying to pass a bill taking part of that away in response to the commercial agricultural community, and parliament backbenchers have even been spreading false propaganda about aboriginal land rights being a threat to residential areas. Its all such bullshit and unfortunately, very difficult to justify/redress.
    I read in the paper today, about an aboriginal woman who said she couldn't accept a drink from the author, because if she took that drink she wouldn't stop drinking with all the tragedy in her life. She was one of the 'stolen generation' and her family has been killed, murdered, separated, etc. etc., and nothing has been done to help. Genocide has happened in so many places... like the red indians in america, the maoris in new zealand, the jews... Justice is very much a theoretical concept, isn't it.

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To move to a rather more frivolous topic, go watch great expectations! its an elegant movie and ethan hawke looks great in it. gwyneth paltrow i think looks emaciated, and her figure's bengkok, but she's got a lovely face. See the girl playing her as a kid. So very Beautiful.
Well. i suppose i sound dead. "Im so bored, I'm the chairman of the Bored." -Iggy Pop. Its ridiculous. I spent two hours in the late afternoon just sitting/stoned out by my window trying to play my violin like a cello. Not even trying, trying suggests expending some effort. *drag drag*... The days are shortening..seasons changing.. no new books to read, no one to call on the phone, no one i want to talk to, nothing to do. nothing but my bed and desk and retarded brother. i wonder what happened. i dont care about anything anymore.

Anyway, to get on with this, here are MangoCentral's Picks for the top ten songs to name-drop to sound happening/hip. not a funny list, just personal favourites for the moment. :) And after that, Kree man's weekly essay..this time he takes an..umm....candid(?) look into...uh...human nature. Read his eulogy.
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Top Ten Songs to listen to to sound hip and cool and happening. :
1) Anything from Beck's 1994 Mellow Gold Album, or the harder to find, One Foot in the Grave. You guys might not have heard about him, but he Is brilliant stuff And respected by the music community for being independently credible. Interesting note: he was one of the answers(questions?) in Jeopardy recently. And, he's just beginning...
2) Arkarna !!! Especially the single "Futures Overrated". Its really good stuff~ go check it out! listen to it! love it! buy me the album! haha
3) Polyester Girl by Regurgitator. (amazing aussie band, amazing song. bet u'll like this one.)
4) Black Bug by Regurgitator. Funny fun song about computer games.
5) Sex and Candy, by Marcy's Playground. According to one dj, an optimum striptease tune. :)
6) pEarL Jam's album YIELD.
7) Sexy Boy by Air (a french group)
8) Anything by Marilyn Manson. On virtue of the fact that most people think they're a female vocalist, and you know better. besides, they ROCK! only problem being their penchant to throw in satanic lyrics. Some people think its just gimmick though.
9) Blur's On Your Own..and the rest of the album...so it's not new, but i like! *rave rave*
10) Iggy Pop!!!! almost a legend, maybe already.

     Eulogy
             by Kree. (the italicised bits are NOT by syn.)
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     I was just wondering what the heck do people when I'm not around.. do they grumble about me? Or crack bad jokes about my pathetic life? Or maybe they just cannot be bothered in the first place! And so… here is something I thought would be more down-to-earth.. um pun not intended.. really!!! (people are starting to mumble about how I've snapped and started typing 'philosophical' nonsense).
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(the following segment is a figment of my wonderfully bored cerebral cortices and any resemblance to anyone in reality is purely coincidental or if you are not convinced then you can go blame my subconscious which incidentally resides in my limbic system.)
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(music plays from the pipe organs… ok so I'm not a Christian.. but hey I have to choose a setting everyone's familiar with right?)
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At the site of the funeral, My funeral.
After the priest has said whatever it is that priests are supposed to say, a really old man would probably hobble up to the little 'podium'..
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Really Old Man:
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As we gather here in solemn remembrance of our friend, we remember what he was like, how he has touched each and everyone of us in our own lives. I've been his friend for 70 over years (god, I never realised it's been That long… sometimes I really amaze myself…)
and somehow we've stuck by each other. He gave me the help, the company I needed, especially when I was in NS being confined or doing duties.
(Right-o… all I know is that when I was in NS he was doing med and laughing at me half the time, except when he had exams. But at least he did spare time to crap around on the phone with me. What a spashole. Heh.)
He was always agreeable to any crazy things I asked him to do,
(such a fool…. easily used…hang on.. he was the spastic madman wanting to photostat various parts of his anatomy..or was it me? I think he was always twisted in some way anyway. What a weirdo. I'm amazed he didn't end up in Woodbridge. Would've confounded the psychologists.)
and I guess he was around when I was bored, never hesitating to go watch a show with me even though the cinema bouncers may think that we were another two gays going to Lido
(yeah man.. the two biggest losers on earth with no date on a Saturday night. Heh.. at least it wasn't that boring…. not always. at least he listened to whatever I was grumbling 'bout. Not that he wasn't grumpy about something half the time too... )
to watch The Birdcage. We sure did some stupid things when we were young. And he was always getting sabotaged by his friends
(haha, maybe he's lying in that lacquered wooden box in his boxers.. )
for some weird reason (weird reason? Heck, did we need any reason? His existence's reason enough!) or other, but he never seemed to mind. (hope he didn't.. might suddenly decide to seek revenge in his err.. new state…)
I'll miss him (mainly the boxers, not him I think.. but then there was the time we cut classes in one big bunch… or maybe the pictures we took together of us, of others. boy the chalet was good….and those strippings..say he's done quite some stuff I must say. Maybe when I go home I'll go list down the strange things I've done.. but I can definitely do without his
moronic insults. Or sarcasm. Who the heck did he think he is.. err…. was anyway?)
and all the things he's done, and I sincerely hope he's happy wherever (that's the right word… wherever… ) he is now.
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Then the Really Old Man would get off the podium, probably chuckling to himself reasons the entire congregation is unable to fathom.. and a Really Old Lady would take his place…
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Really Old Lady:
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Hi to everyone here today.
(hi, and who here has better things to do on a Saturday morning?)
I'm sure we all feel sad that a good friend of ours have departed this world for another….
(Haha wonder which world is he in?)
… I've known this man for quite a long time,
(too long a time I must say… )
and I feel I have to say a few words at this ceremony
(too bad his wife died before he did… otherwise I needn't be up here making a fool of myself… hope both of them are together.. wherever that is…)
in remembrance of the impact (who am I kidding anyway. But yeah, maybe he did help out sometimes…) he has had on our lives. I'm sure we all know he has compassion,
(mental note: confession this Sunday…) and definitely a certain amount of intelligence as we reflect on his achievements. (Strange… but besides being a GP, what else has he done? Well, maybe that's some achievement too I guess.. so I'm not lying..)
But he was always quick to put himself down, as well as the people around him.
(More of the latter I say. Always insulting me… and others.. wonder who else in this congregation remembers what other rotten names he has called them?)
I first bumped into him on the Net (he was right for once… the Net is an evil place…)
and by some strange miracle (miracle??? Well.. ok guess I have no other polite terms to use…) we have managed to stay in touch through the years… he was never too busy to listen to people's problems (busybody more like it. But maybe he was trying to be helpful. ) and that is a precious gift I'm sure he treasured to the end of his life. (Which at long last has ended, like this whole ceremony. Got some catching up to do with some old friends…..)
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     Well, that's probably not going to happen in my real life (I'm really hoping that I'd at least get more good remarks in italics, and of course that my friends would be old... inference: I live to a good old age...), but it's a speculation anyway. What I'm sure is that anyone who bothered to read through the entire chunk up there probably found the snide comments in italics more
interesting because it probably seemed more real. Sometimes people tend to pay too much lip service and start saying nice things without really meaning it. That's indifference. Which has a way of becoming a habit I guess.
     "Love me or hate me, but spare me your indifference"--- someone I can't remember because my head is stuffed with the various steps, inhibitors and enzymes of the Tricarboxylic Cycle. I personally would rather have people cursing me at my eulogy than have them saying nice things for the sake of saying it. Though saying the good stuff which I know is real would probably be
better.. haha..
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Till next week! Thanks for reading...

p/s. To Ben, hahah! i koped your font. :) 'the sincerest form of flattery...blah blah..'

Click on the hand to go to the Action for Aboriginal Rights Website.