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I was in the library yesterday at one of those pc internet terminals, and i SAW MY HMPAGE! On the MONITORS! The 15 inch monitor screens. ARRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!! it looked TERRIBLE!!!!!!!!!!! i hate my life. i hate all desktop terminals. I also hate lousy un-upgraded software..There's this gorgeous creamy beige colour i've been splashing all over my pages, u know what it looked like on the evil monitors? its was some pale vomit green. GREEN!!! i HATE greeN! I can't believe it looks so different. its not faaaaaiiiiiiirraaaaaaaahhhhhh! *bawl*
(so you know what i mean, this bkgrnd is a sample of the nice cream colour as seen on my screen. tell me if it looks classy and beige on ur screens or pale-putrid green.) |
Nevermind. new strategy in making pages. No more classy beige/aka puke green. And no more pressing enter at the end of random lines... it looks such a mess on wider screens....sigh. and no more assuming tables are that size all the time. gonna fix table size with pixels frm now on so there'll be alot of free bkgrnd space when u look at it. better than weird holes in the tables themselves. ok so depressing.
Yar, i know i complain alot about making my homepage and u really don't care. Well i donch care dat u don't care. But im tired of thinking about it. Just one more thing though, to those pple who're waiting for the other Four stories to finish, I tell u, If everyone actually replied those stories ON TIME, they'd have been up like weeks ago. But noooo... a week's length to write 3 sentences and a 'yes i'll do it!' and guess what? i have to bug and nag to get the stories back after the deadlines are up. and i just luuuurrrrvve to be a bleeping pain in ur icq menu.
Yes. It sounds like im doing the hormonal tantrum cycle
thing. Maybe i am. Don't really know. The only person who's ever kept track
of my mood swings was my ex who charted them and planned out 'give her
chocolate' days and 'she's always right' todays or 'hide from her' days.
I think that was so sweet, manipulative even. But life goes on. And i crave
chocolate. Craaaave.
I think I could use a boyfriend now.
To bring to cool concerts and stuff like that. D'ya know that all the coolest
bands (read oasis, U2, metallica, radiohead, matchbox20, pearl jam, etc
etc etc) have visited/are gonna come to sydney and I'm Not Going? No one
i know will go with me!!!! either too square or broke. I haven't seen a
single movie since Titanic either. I have no life my gdness. Im 18 and
i'm allowed to watch the super R(a) movies and guess wht, i don't. At least
the TV movies are good, like that day i watched Nell which is a lovely
movie and the other day i saw this old episode of The Nanny(the one with
the lesbian publicist) and i found out how much they censored off the s'pore
version. Hilarious. One fun thing to do here is to talk about movies and
then mention that u have to be 21 to watch it in s'pore and them watch
them be incredulous. Funny funny...another fun topic is the car prices...but
that depresses me too much to enjoy it enough. harumph.
Anyway, i was talking about getting
a boyfriend right... Yar. Would be great to have someone to go places with,
but i don't think i can be bothered to spend time and effort in maintaining
a relationship rite now...blah blah... maybe i haven't met the right person
yet....blah blah....Heck. maybe during the graduation nightclub party thing
i'll go and rape edwin. *ooooh*.
Hyukhyuk.. freaked u out!
if not, i suppose u know me. (yaaay).
miss my friends. hope they're still
my friends. The weird friend i was talking about in last week's page is
still acting weird. So unbearably irksome. Anyway im *still* trying to
get to the gym to lose a dress size and ohh..i almost got my SSA(s'pore
students assoc.) card today..but they spelt my name wrong..
Hoe Shu Yin. I could live with it i suppose..but
i get enough bad jokes with my present surname i dun need a direct pun
to deal with. Oh and at the SSA booth i was confusing the bunch of sods(no
offense actually meant) about my name and there's this guy, who suddenly
apologised to me about the error, and i Swear i've seen him before...and
lots of times before at that, and i blurt out "Hey You look SO Familiar!"
and then to my dismay he suddenly looks so bashful and frightened or whtever
and i decided better leave him alone. I wonder who he is though.
Seriously SO familiar. If anyone knows someone who's in UNSW this year
i might have seen before (like in acj or whtever), then msg me..he's short(i
think), pale-faced(not my fault),..with a sweet timid hamstery smile. There.
i'm sure he'd like that description. Maybe i'll bump into him again and
make friends if he doesn't run away. He was nice..not like the other girl
there, this snooty thing who deserved to be scared. Maybe next time. Have
to go collect my new card in a few days.
I don't really know why i joined..im
not interested much in their activities(go-kart racing on saturday, bbq
sometime ago), and the newsletter is ..um.. oh well, not much more than
it ever set itself out to be i suppose. Maybe its just nice to know you
belong to something, and that you're now linked to a bunch of people who
all miss chilli crab...you never know, one of them might even have the
recipe! *droooool*....crraaaave chilli crab......and chocolate....
uh..
Well. Oh yes! I think i have to tell
you about Mr Brown. Sometime ago, a friend sent me the url of Browntown,
and i went there and promptly got impressed. Anyway, i didn't tell anyone
about it and its occurred to me im not actually saying anything about it
so i'll start now. Basically, its satirical stuff on current issues in
s'pore, and its clever too. I fwded one of the weekly articles to yuexiang
and i think that was it. When i got the same article fwded back to me later
by yen, it was official. the rj bunch knows about it. Anyway, go visit
the site. Its heap good stuff.
Alllrighty. to end this (finally),
I have this friend. One day, last week, he decided to write stuff, essays
on life, and to spread his words around on massmail. I thought that was
so brave i'm putting it up here(with my email reply). I think i have his
permission..but just to be safe, i wun type out his name till he comes
back on icq and i can ask him. :) Make of it what you will, he's
a weird one. oh wait! he's online again...letsseee..he wants to be known
as....KREE. huh. well there.
Meanwhile, to be drama, i make the
bkgrnd black. cant go wrong with black...
Well, as I seat my insignificant self in front of my PC, I am supposed to be contemplating one of the most frequently asked Questions of all time (when in actual fact I should be doing my biochemistry homework, and replying MY email, although most people after reading whatever I have to offer would most definitely advise me to stick to doing the former). I will not pretend to have all the answers, but shall just give a personal account as to what I have thought of, be it day-dreams during lectures (now you know...), oh please. who doesn't. idle thoughts during my numerous bus-rides back home and so on. So what are we exactly looking
for as we live out our entire lives on little pieces of rock floating
on seawater y'know, to nitpick...the rock
isnt floating on seawater...if it floats
And now we come to what does this cluster of cells, which is not so different from a nation, want? Of course it has to survive, that goes without saying. And thus this rather motley bunch of organisms will feed when they need to, excrete when it has to and some members even, in an amazingly altruistic display, commit cellular suicide for the good of the body-nation. look! a devious reference to the evil carcinogenic radiation from cellular phones~! But what we must ask is: what is the purpose of its survival? As would be expected, these cells would of course hope to achieve cellular nirvana one day, thus attaining immortality. why? wldnt want to be immortal. not on earth anyway. tedious and boring. and life is lost by immortality. However, since a built-in timer has been set in the all our cells (except those renegade commando cells with oncogenic ammunition) we, as a body only have a while stocks last only type of limitation imposed on us. But no way are these cells going to give up without a fight. They decide on the next closest thing to immortality: reproduction. YES!! SEX!!! the good stuff.~!!! And there we have it: we are here on planet Earth to procreate (yes, I definitely hear some cries of protest, though most are of disgust. And some stunned silence to boot) stop thinking like the censorship board . To copulate in fact. euphemisms. just say it! S-E-X! SEX! And the beauty of this whole grand scheme who thought of it? is that we need not overburden mother Earth with multiple replicas of ourselves. who would've thought. but then again.. "you are absolutely unique...just like everyone else." -someone. We almagate our very essence of individuality, our DNA, with a partner (hey, we share too… even at the cellular level) in the hope that our selves will be in some part, preserved on this wonderful planet of ours. yar. years after u die, someone will breathe in oxygen that used to be your leg. morbid. All the things we do: earning
tons of cash, buying a house, driving fancy cars, wearing nice clothes,
working out to look good….. all the things
we do? since when do we earn tons of cash, buy houses, drive fancy cars
and work out? haha. wish wish. all are but
part of the huge process in making ourselves desirable to the members of
the opposite gender. However, I hasten to add that, to put it crudely,
having sex is not the sole aim in life. This rather miraculous collection
of cells that we are have something very valuable, called foresight. We
know that to procreate is not enough, that we have to ensure the infant's
survival. And so it is with this secondary aim that we continue to slog
our lives away to hoard more cash (to feed the drooling youngster, to educate
him/her) to buy better houses (so that he/she need not spend half the night
searching for cardboard boxes) and buying cars (interestingly enough..
the act of allowing teenagers to drive does seem rather counter-instinctive
now does it not?) again. this buying cars....and
the 21 age limit...supposed to come into effect when? but
wait, I do hear some protests now: What about love?, they say.
As I have emphasised earlier
on, I do not pretend to be right. In fact, for all I know I could be way
off the mark as far as my concepts are concerned. But we learn, do we not?
For all those who disagree, take a minute or two on those bus-rides to
think why I am wrong. what's there to disagree
with? i suppose you mean your idea, that people are cell processes and
no more? i Disagree. why? coz i do. and because its so tempting to simplify
rather than diversify(see ur own quote below)and also the simplest explanation
most often is the right one. But, to myself, i am more than that. To the
world, i am just a statistic, to the universe i am no more than a cell,
and to the ends of infinity, i am nothing. Do i matter to you? then i am
more than matter. If not, then it doesn't matter. don't be angry with me
about this...im tired of doing english essays. (feedback
is most welcome) And for those who agree totally, do not be a fool, because
I know that at the very most, I am only partially
right. i think this is cool....like how many
pple actually spend time thinking, then writing an actual essay on their
thoughts, and then to go even further, send the entire text to all their
friends? so brave, i applaud you.
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~~ "We should make things as simple as possible... but not simpler." |
Till next week!