Growing Up...Growing Down

In the life of a child,
I felt so old ...
so different from the others.
I saw things they did not know ...
nor could they understand.

I traveled places
they dared not go...
fearing what they saw and felt.
I traveled to these places ...
because of what
I felt and saw.

It was there I found the quiet ...
a part that seemed so far removed
Sometimes a place of joy ...
other times a place of reflection.
As a child, I did not always
understand these reflections
however,
that didn't seem to matter,
the imprint was being made
upon me.

As the years have passed,
and I have traveled life's pathways,
I realize that I was indeed
an old child
and took solace in that
freedom that I had.

Now I realize
where the comfort comes in
finally being able to
grasp the concepts
that I learned as a child,
lost as a teen,
and forgot as a young adult.
Well, perhaps not forgot...
just didn't utilize.

I grew up as an old child.
Now I can take the comfort in
growing down as an adult.
I know the joy to be obtained
from the simple pleasures of life.
I know how to work hard
and therefore,
I can enjoy play.

I know how to enjoy my leisure,
therefore, working hard
does not offend me.
I understand the quiet,
and do not feel a fear.
I know how to be alone,
and not be lonely.
I know when my spirit is restless..
and what I must do
to find my comfort.

I thought
for so long that my place
was to be alone.
As a child,
I dreamed only of finding one
with whom to share the joys.
As an adult,
I dreaded an intruder ...
for fear
of the lack of comfort.

Then one day,
I made a friend ...
another old child.
When I reached out my hand,
he took it.
Not understanding at first ...
for he had forgotten too.

As time has passed,
we looked upon each other..
knowing of growing up
and being old children..
and growing down
and being young as adults.
We made our way
in the world,
in spite of the risks.

Along the way,
we obtained
a particular kind of freedom.
That freedom
is what kept us separate
from all others,
until now.
Now we walk away...
....looking back at one another..
both with the dreams of the child...

but also the understanding
of the adult...
Perhaps along the way
we had already found
the perfect place....
together.