On a Dream and The Lie of Ego-lessness Last night (March 20, 1997) I had a dream and I would like to recount it here and ask for some insight from the Gardeners. Here is the dream as I recorded it in my dream journal: Dream of the night of March 20: I am a jellyfish-type creature, tossed about on a violent sea early in Earth's history, aware of things as a jellyfish is. Suddenly, there is a Shining Presence and I am more awake. I am a horseshoe crab at a later time near the shore, aware of things as a horseshoe crab is. Suddenly, a Shining Place appears on the shore and a Shining Woman walks into the water and stops by me. She squats down and I feel so peaceful that I stop scurrying on the sand and settle down. She reaches out and touches my shell and I become more aware and I am in love with Her. I am an herbivorous dinosaur, two-legged, with small "arms," aware of things like a dinosaur is. Suddenly, there is a Shining Woman who gazes at me and touches me and I become more aware and in love with Her. --> Side dream within the dinosaur part - I am a tall woman in a house looking out the window at the dinosaur. I am trapped in the house and ultimately killed by a crocodile-type of carnivorous dinosaur that got in. In each of the segments I am aware of being both the creature and the Shining Woman. I believe that She is a First One, a Gardener. I woke up with the certain knowledge that She is coming back and, when She touches me again, I will wake up more and more. I wonder if the Gardeners are us, cultivating, across "time," our own "evolution." Now I would like to get some feedback and information from the Gardeners about this, so I will sit here and wait until I am answered. Ibiru: Hello. What you experienced last night was a simplified overview of what you call evolution. As each stage of development reaches its limits, we, whom you call the Gardeners, return and help you through to the next level of awareness. This is something that all sentient species do when they have reached, themselves, a certain level of understanding. As you are aware, I observed the conversation you had with Gordon this morning, concerning the nature of the ego and its proper place in your psyche. If you think back to your dream and re-experience what it felt like to be a jellyfish, a horseshoe crab and a dinosaur, you will see that each level had a higher degree of integration and that the ego of each creature was stronger than the previous. This is a very important point, especially considering the powerful focus your religions and cults have on eliminating the ego. Please read carefully and thoughtfully what I am about to write. Diminishing or eliminating your ego is not only impossible but, if you were to succeed, all growth and movement would cease. There would be no further creativity, no awakening. As long as you are, your ego will be an integral and necessary part of your being. And that is eternal. No, your ego does not die when your body does. Your sense of self continues and your very desire to manifest bespeaks the presence of your ego. The religious and social desire to slay the ego stems from the mistaken belief that the Sacred, the First Cause, is somehow separate from Its Creation. Therefore, all desire, all points of view, all sense of individual Self are seen as impediments to enlightenment, which is seen as the absence of all these things, or at least a complete detachment from them. Nothing could be further from the truth. The Sacred expresses ItSelf AS each and every created thing, creature, being. True enlightenment is a result of the full integration of ALL that you are, ego included. It is only when that crystallization of Self is complete that you can move to the next level of Being...and you go there WITH your ego. A community of egoless beings, if such a thing could be, would look like this: One personality, that being the leader, served by a hive. Many cults, many societies have attempted to create just such a situation. It is vital that you ask yourself why it is considered more Spiritual to relinquish your personality, your point of view, your sense of individual self than it is to integrate and fully manifest your individuality. Furthermore, I would ask you to consider this: Who benefits from your sacrifice? Who benefits when your attention is turned to a futile battle to cast yourself into the Outer Darkness? Who would be threatened by a world of people deeply committed to fulfilling everything that they are? Why is the quest for fulfillment defined as a "selfish" thing and destructive to the whole? And, finally, why would the First Cause become the Manifest Reality only to demand that the only way Home is to deny and slay Its very Selves? The ego, in balance, is the defining part of you. You can no more live without this than you can without air. But you also need to understand that, out of balance, your sense of self will be either overly important or not important enough. Your task is to fully individuate, with a healthy regard for your own Self, while having an equally healthy respect for the Selves of all others.