November 2, 1998

It's Not Meant to Happen

I am a dreamer, and I believe all dreams have as much right to be in reality as reality does in dreams. I spend a lot of time looking at where I am now and imagining the future I want it to become. I might plan something for the next few hours, or maybe the weekend, like I just did. My happiness will be ingrained in the realization of these dreams, but then something will snap it: a realization about a date and other commitments. . . a last-minute phone call from someone canceling. . . or just the poopieness of existence. Needless to say, my dreams fall apart, always. One just fell apart.

Comments:

• ~i got what i wanted and now my life is just boring, til everything falls apart, then i get to try to put it back together~
  -Jeff

• What the hell are you talking about?

  Are you okay?

  Do you need to be hugged?
  -Ray

• Nick... i'm just sitting here trying to think of the last time you sent me a diogenes or anything else for that matter that sounded happy... just wondering if there's anything i can do.
  -Marshall