November 3, 1998

Nick is not meant to be Happy

Many of you out there have written to me worried about Nick's current emotional state. Nick assures you all that everything is going fine. Nick says Nick is content with life, but Nick not happy. This is a good thing, for consider the possible consequences of a 'happy' Nick:

1. If Nick were happy, he wouldn't give a damn about other people. Nick believes that helping people leads Nick closer to happiness. If Nick happy, he don't need to get any closer to happy.
2. A happy Nick would hurt the economy. A happy Nick would me likely to spend money on himself and others, and the resultant upsurge in economic activity would rattle the already unstable stock market.
3. Mathematics would lose its most hunkiest brain guy since happy people are not allowed to be math majors.
4. Nick would have no reason to write semi-funny Diogenes all in third-person.
5. The Book of Revelation clearly says, "And lo, the moon will turn blood red and the sky shall fill with showers of fish and Nick shall smile for no good reason other than Nick happy." Nick don't want to bring about the Apocalypse, do you?

See, Nick has his reasons.

Comments:

• How odd... you see yourself as content with life but not happy. I was just thinking to myself the other day (Sunday) that I am happy with where I am in life but not content.

  If I were content with my life, I would become complacent and cease to be the risk-taking, cutting edge Ray that we all know and love.

  I am happy though, because I regret nothing that Ihave done. I accept myself for what I am and if that doesn't lead to happiness, nothing will.

  Maybe its just the severe lack of sleep talking, but I just want to say: "huaserkk".
  -Ray

• can we say pInhead piece?
  -Jeff

• <clap clap clap clap clap clap>

  It is true, contentment and happiness are two separate things. I sincerely hope you can get to the latter without causing the stunting of mathematical growth, economic strife or the apocalypse, someday. Until then lets just make big ass productions and make fun of Ray.
  -Ryan