On December 5, 1998, Daniel P. Ward will be married to Darby J. Bruton in Fresno, CA!
I met Darby through the company that I work for, and I knew right away that she was something special. Of couse, me being the shy sort, it took the help of a mutual friend to get us together. A few trips to Black Angus, Coffee, and so on, and Darby and I were an item by December, 1997. I proposed to her on Valentines Day, 1998.
As far as I'm concerned, Darby is the most wonderful person in the world. She is intelligent and charming, and she is the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with. Darby has the face on an Angel, and I could spend an eternity gazing into her eyes.
Even before Darby and I began dating, I knew she was something very special. She has a glow about her when she smiles that I'd never seen before. She has a sense of style, and when she's left her mark, it is unmistakable. Darby is fun.
I must admit that I really don't remember the first time we actually met. I remember seeing her around, and I recall some nice, although brief conversations with her. I remember well the day that she rode with me in my ambulance. That was the day that I ran my very first Code on my own. (I'd worked others, as an EMT, as an Intern, and as a new hire, under the supervision of an FTO.) The final outcome was predictable, but I'd conducted myself well, and had done everything right.
From that point on, as I recall, Darby and I always had something to say to each other, if only a smile and a brief Hello. When there was time, we talked more about ourselves, and I found that I was telling her things that I'd never told to anyone before. I remember her telling me, with pasion, her love of Pismo Beach, and she sort of Invited herself along if I'd ever decided to go there myself. It made me laugh, and we eventually did go there together, after we started dating.
There was a bit of a Halloween party in October '97, that she and I were both at. I showed up late, as I'd had to work that night, but Darby was the first familiar face I saw. And I was glad it was her. Now, I admit that I wasn't looking for anything with anyone at the time, and I got exactly what I was looking for. I was at a table with Darby and Sheila and a couple others that I didn't know, just sort of checking things out. Now Sheila and her date went to the bar, and Darby decided to go and Dance (I think she asked me to join her and I declined, but I forget) and during the time that I was alone, I was acosted by a couple of other women I knew from work, who took me to the other side of the room to where the 'cool people' were. (mainly it was the group that was doing the most tequila shots) Sheila joined us a short time later, saying that she and her date were leaving, and that Darby had already left. I remember feeling sorry that she'd left so soon, before I could spend any real time with her.
Time passed.
Sheila and I were regular partners and she saw early on the potential between Darby and I. She often questioned me about what I thought of Darby. Of course, I had to be nonchalant about it, and my answers were usually something like "She's cool," or "I'd go out with her." It was Sheila who made sure that Darby and I were put together socially at every opportunity, and for that, I will always be Grateful.
Our first real date, meaning the first time she and I went out together with noone else, was a simple trip to a coffee shop. We talked for hours about life, the universe and Everything. I made her listen to some of my music in the car (the Toy Dolls), and she was not revolted, which still amazes me. By the end of that evening, I knew that I wanted to be with her. I would look at her eyes, and forget where I was.
We officially became an item a few days later.
And now we're engaged to be married!
Having absolutly no idea with how to go about this sort of thing, when I asked Darby to marry me, I proposed with an Irish Wedding Band. The Claddaugh ring also doubles as a friendship ring or a promise ring. I was fairly certain that she'd say yes, but I still had some doubts. A couple of days later, she and I went out shopping for her Real Engagement Ring. Those people weren't kidding when they asked 'How else could two months salary last forever'!!! Well, We eventually were able to pick out something that worked for us both, a lovely solitaire with a .56 carat princess-cut diamond. And it's only about one months wages.
On march 29th, Darbys father and step-mom held an engagement party in our honor. It was quite an event that left us completely overwhelmed with love and joy. I, for one, was very nervous about the official meeting of the families. My Parents, brother, his girlfriend, and best friend and wife, all drove from Sacramento to Fresno to meet with her family. And it went very very well.
We were given a number of gifts that left me completely speechless, as I never even considered that I might be getting any...Not then. Crystal Champaigne flutes, Cake-cutters, and a cake-topper. WOW!
I recently had to make a trip to Sacramento, and since Darby and I have conflicting schedules, I went alone. It was the first time since our engagement that we'd been seperated like this. It was only three days, but still...
It was a strange, yet wonderful realization to know that, although Sacramento is my hometown, my Home is wherever Darby is.
August 28, 1998 I hate to admit it, but I'm actually starting to worry a little. Not about getting married, I can't wait for that. I'd be happy if it were tomorrow instead of three months from now. No, I'm starting to worry about the details that have yet to be resolved. A number of little things. I guess any guy who's been here knows what I mean. I just want to marry her, don't bother me with the details.
The count is down to Double Digits. My, time does fly when you're having fun!
In the meantime...
Darby and I took a trip to Seattle in late july. I was quite an adventure, which is fine since Seattle is quite a town. I think that it is the opposite of Fresno in just about every way. Oddly enough, We were there during the only four days of sunshine they had this year, and I got sunburned! I hope to have photos up here soon.
Darby started a new job. Better hours, more pay. To quote Homer Simpson, "WooHoo!" But she was, and still is, sad to leave the old one.
September 11, 1998 Well, remember that new job? When Darby first started there, she was assured that there would be no problem in getting time off for the wedding and honeymoon. We just found out that they are going to put her through a six week course of training, starting in mid november, and she absolutly cannot, under any circumstances, even an act of god, miss any of it. Period. No more discussion is desired, etc etc. This was originally scheduled for january, but it was moved up for some unknown reason.
(sigh)
So, we'll reherse for the wedding friday night after work, have the wedding saturday, and spend that night in the best suite the Fresno Sheraton has to offer. Maybe sunday too, but she'll be back to work on monday morning. Now, I'm sure anyone reading this can understand how frustrating this is. Thank God we don't have to change plans with the wedding itself! In the meantime, all goes well in that department. We're meeting at the church today to go over some details with the coordinator and pastor.
September 18, 1998 Now we're not sure what's happening! That training has been moved back to january again, but I'm led to believe that I can't count on it not changing again. So, We'll have the wedding, and play it by ear after that. Maybe we won't have the honymoon we'd hopped for, but there are plenty of local alternatives, and I'm sure I can come up with something. Our original plan will just have to wait until out First Anniversary.
This last week, we shelled out a lot more money on some of the bigger items. Mainly the flowers and the photgrapher. Touched bases with the minister I've asked to perform the ceremony (she's from out of town)and all is well there. Have the guest list hammered out, and the invitations will be delivered next week. And I'm working overtime shifts at least once a week now. Is it like this for everyone? When I hear some of the stories that are out there, I come to think that I'm getting off remarkably easy.
I'm just lucky that way, I guess.
November 17, 1998. The tension is mounting! Darby had her Bridal Shower a few days ago, and came away with plenty of loot. And with lots of good wishes and all that stuff. The final fitting for the dress is in a couple of days. Nest week, I'll be going home to Sacramento for my Bachelor Party, which is going to be low-keyed. Just me and a couple of guys hanging out, smoking cigars, having a few beers, and remembering when we were kids. No strippers. (shrug)
I've reached the conclusion that things are pretty much completely out of my hands. Invitations were sent out in mid-october, and her family invited at least 3 people for every one I invited. I had thought we were trying to keep it small. But, the only part where the body count really matters is the reception, and that is being put on by Darby's father. I long ago lost any say in that. But I figure, if he's going to pay for it, he can invite as many people as he wants to. As long as they all come bearing gifts. As of last night, our count is 117 guests confirmed. And there's 3 weeks to go, so that number might double.
Those of you who have read this narrative from start to finish might note a change in my tone. The wedding is almost here, but I have reached the point where I want it to be in the past. There have been so many hassles, and I've worked so much overtime, that I'm getting fed up with the process of it all. I love Darby with all my heart. I want to spend the rest of my life with her in a world of bliss. Just three more weeks, Dan. Just three more weeks.
Wow!
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