To All The Goldfish I Have Killed
(Or Driven To Suicide)
By Lia!
Bob and Louie were condemned
To die as turtle-bait.
Dean gave them, instead, to me
And I gave them a crueller fate
Death By Chlorine
Bob and Louie choked and died
I had a bowl so I thought, "Why
Should I not get another fish?"
(And condemn it too to die)
Enter Posiedon
Posiedon was a lovely carp
Calico, with big black eyes.
I bought Ariel to be his friend
Ariel lives – Posiedon dies
Ariel Alone
Ariel was a week alone
After Posiedon’s sad demise
For of Ariel I thought to myself’
"It will not be long before she dies"
Ariel Lives: Enter Ursula
It seemed evident Ariel would survive
And so she would not be alone
I went and bought Ursula
To share Ariel’s happy home
Enter Posiedon II – Betta of Death
And I thought my fishes needed space
And so I bought them something new
A three-and-one-half gallon tank
And a betta named Posiedon II
The Great Betta Massacre
Ariel and Ursula were great friends
But Posiedon didn’t have a heart
He chased the carp and I came home
To find Ursula floating – torn apart
Enter Antigone
I scooped Ariel from the tank
Returned her to the bowl
I went and bought Antigone
To share her happy home
Exit Antigone
And to the tank the carp returned
Posiedon did not do them harm
And yet Antigone did die
Much to my alarm
Bizarre Circumstances of Death
Like her namesake, Antigone
Had committed Suicide
Seeking freedom she leapt from the tank
And on the floor she splattered wide
Ariel Lives On
But Ariel, sweet Ariel,
Surrounded by such death and woe
Lived on! Lived on!
And even lived long enough to grow
A Grim Surprise
Ariel the hardy – Ariel the brave
I thought she’d live forever more
I awoke today to find Ariel
Splattered on the hardwood floor.
