Where have all the knights gone?
I still cry when I see Camelot. The noble heart of King Arthur's
world torn apart by the world in which he lives. It seems so much
like what I see on a daily basis, and that in itself is sad. The
way people use and take advantage of others in today's society is
truly a sobering if not a heartbreaking experience.
What happened to the time when a person's word was their bond?
When someone would put their sense of honor and duty above their
pride or greed? Long gone are the days when the code of chivalry
was the self-imposed law of the land.
Really, though, would it kill anyone to treat their neighbors with
respect? For a guy to make that extra push to be a gentleman or a
woman to express herself as a lady? Doesn't take a lot. Just
respect. There are a few versions of the code out there, but I have
developed my own code, and follow it to a fairly full extent. What
does a knight believe in the age where there are no dragons left to
slay? Here goes:
Treat people the way you wish to be treated.
Realize that other people are equals, not objects.
It's okay to admit defeat. We're not perfect.
Enjoy life. Just because someone says it's not great doesn't
mean we have to accept it as the way things have to be.
Mistakes are learning experiences. Grow from them, don't dwell on
them.
Make your own decisions. Following the crowd will never help you
find the real you.
Violence is never an acceptable option. If it must be used, make
sure no option has been overlooked first.
Be honest with yourself. Then be honest with others.
Understand the other person's view before siding for or against
it.
Make the most you can with what you have instead of just settling
for "okay".
I know some of these are not a part of the lifestyle of chivalry, but
I am working on something better, the lifestyle of happiness. I feel
it is far better, and in the long run, more fulfilling.
Courtship in the ninties
Perhaps I spend too much time thinking about it, but I feel I need to impart a little wisdom to the "guys" out there. I say this simply because there are many levels of the male persuasion. There are the men: complete and secure in who they are, who live by this code in some form. There are the dudes: somewhat clueless, yet harmless. Then there are the guys: testosterone based lifeforms whose take on life is that "Animal House" and "Porky's" are the Old and New Testament.
For you, I impart these few tidbits which explain my idea of how to graduate from "guy" to "man".
It never killed anyone to treat a woman like a lady.
If she finds this offensive, then it's okay to let up a little, otherwise, let it ride.
I believe Dennis Miller said it best when he said "Get it through your head, Quest for Fire Boy. When she says 'no', she means 'no'!"
If she is blitzed and offers anything, show a little respect for her condition. It would be too easy to take advantage of the situation. That also makes it too easy to demonstrate how little respect you have for her if you follow through.
If it's over, walk away. Destroying her with words, hitting her, destroying her personal items, all of this is childish behavior. You were intimate once... don't destroy every last ounce of friendship which might remain.
All of this can be summed up in one key thought. Remember: a relationship is not a right, it's a gift. It can be taken away as easily as it was given. If you feel that you are entitled to anything more or better out of life just because you have an extra external appendage, you will never be truly happy in a relationship. It comes from mutual trust, respect, and a shared outlook in life. Growing together. If you can't or won't accept that, then you will always be looking for someone to serve you... empty pleasure... which is really the most shallow and least fufilling experience you will ever encounter. Well, that and eating a Twinkie... but that's another story.
For a chance to join other knights in the quest for a better tomorrow, check out the Renaissance Men at http://www.otherwhere.com/Fantazia/renmen.htm.
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