Yes, the many morons that have had the opportunity to annoy me over the years.  And the many fools that I have tormented as well. All of the stories on this page are true.  Only the names have been changed to protect the moronic.  Here is just a sample of the fun I've had.

THE MAGICAL DIP TRIP
    I was suffering through my eight hours of work when I saw a bunch of teenage drunks congregate outside the door.  A guy and girl came in the store to buy stuff.  The girl came to the register to get cigarettes, I asked her for I.D., she showed her driver's license, and I gave her cigarettes.  The guy asked for snuff, and I carded him.  (As you may or may not know, it is federal law that salespeople must card everyone who looks under 27, even if you know that person.  Remember, it's not just the law, it's a pain in my a**.)   I knew he was at least 18, but no I.D., no snuff.  He asked the girl buy the snuff , but before she could even ask, I refused her, and told them to go away.  He went outside to ask another girl to get the snuff.  The silly slattern came in and asked for the same brand of chew. Using a subtle form of discouragement, I told her that she could buy it, only if she'd take a dip.  Every other female that I've ever done this to were smart enough to run away, but not her.  Nope, she agreed.  How silly of her.  So she showed her I.D. and gave me money, and asked for the chew.  I opened it for her, and told her enjoy.  She took a pinch and tried to leave, but I wouldn't let her just yet.  She opened wide, and with much trepidation, put the wad of snuff under her tongue.  A look of disgust crossed her face, and I happily gave her the tin.  She ran out the store and went away.
   As much fun as this was, about an hour later the group of people came back to the store.  I saw her outside, and she looked quite ill.  The moral of this story: chewing tobacco isn't for everyone, and sometime it's better to spit that to swallow.
 
 MICRO-CRACK!  NOW AVAILABLE IN YOUR GROCER'S FREEZER SECTION.
    I was being annoyed through my eight hours of work when I saw an older guy come in.  He asked my co-worker if he could heat up some soup in the microwave for 25 cents.  She said OK, and he gave her a quarter.  He went to the microwave, put something in, and turned it on.  In a few seconds, this horrible smell engulfed the store.  We looked over at the bum by the microwave, and my co-worker yelled what the hell he put in there and told him to take his quarter back and get out of the store.  He responded soup, as he took a little baggie (less than an inch by an  inch and a half in size) out of the microwave.  She asked him when they started making baggies of crack-soup, and he ran off.  When we looked at the microwave, the ceramic bottom was scorched and melted a bit.
    I guess the moral of this story is until they make micro-crack, it's best when cooked in a conventional oven set on 350 degrees, cooked for 25 minutes, and basted often.  I guess.  (OK, there is no moral, it's just a stupid story.)

FROM THE MAKERS OF MICRO-CRACK, MICRO-POT!
    I was being bothered through my eight hours of work when some moron came in and asked if he could heat a burrito in our microwave.  I said that it was OK.  I was talking to my co-worker, when a peculiar smell wafted across the store.  I looked over to the microwave, and saw that something in it was on fire.  I yelled what the bloody f*** he put in there, and he opened the door, and the pot smell just about knocked me over.  I told him to get the hell out, and he ran out the door.
    The moral of the story is that you need to watch your investments, otherwise they may go up in smoke.