What is the point of St. Septimus's Day? Valentine's Day is the day of the year set aside for lovers to buy expensive crap for their sweeties: spend money on dinners, candy, flowers, jewelry, and furs and whatnot. Couples walk hand in hand and fawn all over each other and all sorts of other obnoxious behavior. This is all an attempt to rub it in the faces of those of us who are bitter and dateless. Think of all of the psychological trauma suffered by we the single, we are forced to watch commercials featuring happy couples. I for one would like to go a year without seeing happy people groping each other in the name of love.
So this brings us to St. Septimus's Day. St. Septimus's Day is the day for jilted lovers. It is the day that we have to let those who have spurned and shunned us exactly how we feel about them. It's not just for love, St. Septimus's Day is for anyone that you hate! Let's not forget lust too, you can send a St. Septimus's Day greeting to anyone that you want to get into bed.
Every holiday has an icon to put on greeting cards, t-shirts, earrings, hanging decorations. To that end, I nominate Diemos, Greek god of Pain. Deimos was chosen because is he the son of Ares, the god of war, and Aphroditie, goddess of love. But also, what better description of love (and trying to find it) than pain?
So in celebration of America's newest, favorite holiday, send someone you hate a special virtual post card, there are three to choose from:
Show your spirit, let someone know how you feel this St. Septimus's Day.
