By: Rebekah Parham
-36-
"Hello to you too, Alex."
"You have never missed a day of class since school started. You don't look sick, so what's up?"
Samantha returned to her seat on the couch, where she had been before getting up to answer the door. "Nothing's up. I dropped out of Stanford."
Alex's mouth opened, but for a minute nothing came out. "You did what?"
"I didn't exactly drop out, it's more like I withdrew my enrollment."
"Why would you do that? Do you know how hard it is going to be for you to find a job without a college education, and it's not going to matter how well you can aim a camera."
"Alex, calm down. I didn't drop out of college all together. I plan on going back."
"When?"
"Monday"
Alex looked even more puzzled now that he had before. "You dropped out, yet you are going back to class on Monday. Am I the only one not getting this?"
"Alex, I'm going back to school on Monday, but it won't be to Stanford."
"Where are you going?"
"I have decided to go to UCLA for the rest of my college education."
"Why?"
"Well, as you know, when my father died I didn't take any of his money."
"Which was stupid. You could have been set for life."
Samantha gave Alex a harsh glare before continuing. "Anyway, the only money I have is the small trust fund I received from my mother. It would have been enough for me to finish college at Stanford, but that's about it. If I go to UCLA, I can save like half of the money. Plus, UCLA has a very good photography program."
Alex understood why she was doing this. He just didn't know why she hadn't told him. "When did you decide all of this?"
"About 3:00 this morning."
"Why weren't you asleep?"
Samantha's shoulders slumped, "Just wasn't tired." That wasn't the real reason though It had been nearly a year since she had seen John and she still couldn't manage to sleep a whole night through. Most of the days she did okay not thinking about him, but at night when she was alone, it all came back to her.
El Paso, Texas; that were John, Robby, and Mike were stopped for a show. They had been touring for nearly six months. When they first left, Carly had stayed behind; but about Two months ago she had showed up at a show they did in Salt Lake City and she had been with them ever since.
John had tried to adjust to married life, and he had to admit that it wasn't so bad. Some days were better than others. He kept his mind off Samantha by writing songs or rehearsing some of the old ones.
"Sound check in ten minutes," John heard Elliot yell as he passed the open window of the bus.
John put his guitar down and looked around for a clean shirt. He found all his clothes were neatly folded in the compartment beside his bunk. Snatching out the first one he saw he put it on and headed into the large club they were going to be playing in.
They hadn't recorded and released their third album but that was next on the agenda. This time in stead of recording in Buffalo were they had done the previous tow they were using the record label studio in California. Success for the band had grown, but it was still small on the rock and roll scale. For now John was happy with the success they had and the tour they were on.
Alex had finished his junior year at Stanford, but decide Samantha was right about UCLA having a better photography program. They were in all the same classes and were lab partners in their photo tech class. That was the class that taught you how to mix chemicals for processing and developing film.
Over the summer Samantha had begun sending in samples of her work to magazines. Her professor had warned her that it could take up to two years to find a job as a professional photographer. A few of her pictures had been published in the school newspaper, and one of them made it into the LA Times.
Samantha had moved to an apartment closer to the campus. She found a nice loft with enough room for all of her things and her and Alex's dark room. It wasn't anything like the apartment her father had found for her. Everything in the apartment had been clean and beautifully spotless. The loft was completely the opposite. She and Alex had spent hours scrubbing and painting to get it looking nice. It was a lot of work, but it was something Samantha took pride in when it.
Work on the loft was still far from finished. She still had to paint her bedroom, put wallpaper in the bathroom, and unpack everything that was still in boxes. Samantha hadn't wanted to unpack, then have to cover everything up while she was painting so she only took things out of the boxes that she needed.
Samantha set out Saturday morning to find a color that she could paint her bedroom with. It was a beautiful spring day, but a nip was still in the air. March had turned out to be a very beautiful month in California. March in Seattle had been like all the other months, rainy and wet; Buffalo most likely would still have snow on the ground.
Walking down the side walk to the Home Depot that had just opened, Samantha was stopped by a woman with dark curly hair that stood a few feet taller than her. "Am sorry I don't mean to bother you, but is your name Samantha?"
Samantha knew she had seen the girl before, but couldn't place who she was. "Yes"
"I thought that was you. I mean I have only ever seen a picture of you and it was taken a few years ago so I wasn't sure."
"You said you saw a picture of me?" Samantha questioned. She still wasn't sure who the woman standing before her was.
"Oh I'm sorry, how silly of me. You probably don't know who I am. I'm Carly."
Samantha tried to remember when she had met a Carly but she couldn't think of any. "I still can't seem to place who you are."
"That's okay, we haven't met before. I'm Carly Rzeznik, John's wife."
"I am guessing that you think it's odd for me to introduce myself like this; but I have heard a lot about you. I really just wanted to see for myself if you were as wonderful as everyone said you were."
Having found her voice again Samantha smiled, saying, "I'm sorry. You just seemed to catch me off guard. If I had known I would be meeting you today I would have worn something a little nicer." Samantha had intended on painting when she got home so she had kept on her jeans that were already paint splattered.
"You look fine. Are you out doing some shopping?"
"I was going to look for some paint. I just bought a small loft and am trying to fix it up."
"Would you mind if I walked with you for a little bit? I would really like to talk to you."
She seemed like a nice enough person. "Sure, " Samantha said. They walked on a little ways stopping every now and then to window shop of browse through some of the sidewalk vendors. Small talk basically consisted of the weather and the remodeling of Samantha's loft.
It was after Samantha had picked out an light shade of blue paint that Carly started talking about John. "He thinks about you a lot." Her sentence got Samantha's attention, but she didn't say anything. "Of course he never says anything to me about you anymore. I think it's because he doesn't want to make me feel uncomfortable; but I can tell when you are on his mind. He gets this far off look in his eye and doesn't really pay attention to what is being said around him."
Handing the money to the cashier and picking up both gallons of paint Samantha said, "I'm sure it's work he is thinking about. It's been a long time since I have even seen him."
Carly stopped and stopped Samantha long with her. "Listen, I may be going about this all wrong, but I love my husband and I can tell that there is something missing inside him. Like he is always searching for something that's not there. He used to tell me about you, about your friendship. He said that you seemed connected in a way he has never felt with anyone."
"Carly, John is just trying...."
"Let me finish, please. I know John cares about me and that's why he doesn't talk about you anymore, but I want him to be happy and I think you can help him."
"How do you think I could help him?"
"I think if he were to see you again and you were to talk about things then maybe he could let go of the past and move forward."
Usually when the thought of seeing John again came into her mind it frightened the daylights out of her. Now that his wife was suggesting it, actually begging for it to happen, it didn't seem like such a bad thing.
Carly went back to the small apartment she and John were renting while they were in California. It seemed like a big waste of money to keep paying for hotel bills when an apartment was less expensive.
"John, are you home?"
"Be out in a minute," she heard from the bedroom. "Rob and I were talking today, and we think we may be able to start recording in a few weeks."
"John, that's wonderful. I didn't realize you already had that many songs written."
"We didn't either until we put our stuff together today." John came out of the bedroom wearing a pair of faded jeans and an LA Lakers tee shirt. "What do you want to do for dinner tonight because I am starved."
"We going to go to a friends house for dinner tonight."
"A friend? When did you meet this friend?"
"Today, but don't worry I know you are going to like her."
"Come on Carly, can’t we just stay here tonight or get something and bring it back? I don't feel like meeting your new friend."
"No, we can. It's about time you made friends other that Robby and Mike. They are fine and you know how much I love them, but it's time you had a change of space."
Samantha was ready to change her mind when she heard the door bell ring. Taking one last look in the mirror, Samantha went to the door, took a deep breath, and opened it.
John watched the door open and slowly started to recognize the person standing on the other side. After staring at Samantha for a moment he looked from Carly back to Samantha. "What's going on?"
"Samantha has invited us over for dinner. Are you just going to stand there or are you going to come in?" Carly asked, after she had walked into the loft.
John took a step inside but never took his eye off of Samantha. "Was this your idea?"
"No, it was mine," Carly announced. "I know this is probably strange for both of you, but I don't see any reason why you tow can't continue to be friends. I am going to make myself busy in the kitchen and give you a chance to talk."
Samantha's throat had suddenly gone very dry. "Would you like to sit down?" Samantha asked pointing to the couch. "I am still unpacking so please excuse the mess."
"Sam, you don't have to talk to me as if we are strangers."
"I'm sorry. I am nervous."
"I should be more nervous than you are. At least you were expecting to see me tonight."
"I'm sorry I thought Carly would have told you, but I can tell that she didn't."
Silence settled on them for a little while longer. "Carly tells me that you are going to be recording another album soon."
"Yeah, Rob and I talked with our producers today. We should be able to start in the next few weeks."
Samantha looked down at her hands, they were pressed so tightly together in her lap that her knuckles were turning white. Noticing that John was just as tense as she was, Samantha started laughing.
"What are you laughing about?"
"Look at us. Once we couldn't shut up when we were together, and now we can manage a simple declarative sentence."
At this, John started laughing too. "I would have never thought we would ever be nervous around each other like this."
"Me either," Samantha said. She let John finish laughing before adding, "John, we don't have to be so shy around each other. Maybe Carly's right, maybe we can still be friends. I really miss being able to go to talk with you."
"I miss that too. Sam, do you think we could do this. Be friends and not let all the old stuff come between us?"
"I don't see why we can't give it a shot. I mean, if we fail at it we are no worse off than when we started."
"What does it look like?" Samantha answered from the top of the counter where she stood. She hadn't heard John open the door, but that may have been because she left it open so it would air out the paint smell.
"It looks like you are about to break your neck. Get down from there."
"I have to stand up here so I can finish gluing this border down. It would look pretty stupid if only one side of the kitchen had a border up."
"Well, you shouldn't be up there."
"Why should I pay someone to do it when I can do it just as well as anyone else?"
"Get down, and I will finish it."
"I think you have done enough work around my place for a while. You don't have to keep showing me your skills as a handy man." Samantha had been impressed when she and John had first decided to become friends again. she had had her doubt, but things were going fine. He hand Carly had helped her and Alex paint her bedroom and wallpaper the bathroom. Alex and John had moved all of her furniture from storage in the apartment, and now he wanted to help her border her kitchen.
"I know I don't have to, but someone needs to help you before you kill yourself." John helped Samantha down, the got up on the counter and listened to her instruct him on the process of applying a border.
It had been seven months since John and Samantha had rekindled their friendship. John had attended her graduation and she had gone with him a few times to watch them perform. It was just like old times. "What are you doing here anyway. I thought you and Carly were going to the luncheon with her friends at the daycare."
Carly had gotten bored sitting around the apartment everyday while John was gone; so she got a job with an elementary school as a teaching assistant.
"She went, I told her I didn't really feel like it."
"You don't like her friends?"
"They're okay, I guess."
"Then what's the problem?"
John jumped off the counter and observed his handiwork. "Pretty good right?"
"It looks really good, but stop trying to avoid my question."
"I don't know what's wrong Sam. Everyday now, it's like there is something new to fight about. I get tired of fighting so I just don't say anything, and that makes things even worse."
"Have you tired talking about your problems?"
"The only problem Carly seems to have is me. I'm gone too much, I work too hard, I never have enough time for her. It's always something."
"She is just bored. Give her a chance to adjust to life with you and when you guys go back on the road, she will have plenty to do."
"She isn't going to go with us."
"Why is she going to stay around here for the next six months?"
"She's moving back to Buffalo. She wants to go back to school and she doesn't want to do it here."
"Carly wants to go back to school? That's great! I know she has been talking about it for a while."
"Yeah, she is very excited. She talked to one of her friends and they went to Buffalo State to register her for classes this fall. She is going to leave the day before we go back on tour."
"Maybe this time apart will do you some good. You know what they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder."
"Yeah."
"Hit the peddle....no the other peddle...Stop!"
"Alex, you're making me nervous."
"Samantha, learning to drive should be a task that is taken very seriously. You waited until you were twenty-three years old to get your drivers license; that means you are ready to take responsibility and a safe and cautious driver."
"Are you finished?" Samantha asked from behind the wheel of Alex's BMW. When Samantha had told Alex she wanted to learn to drive, she had no idea that he had planned on teaching her himself.
"Lets try this again. Turn the key in the ignition, put the car into drive, and slowly take you foot off the brake."
Samantha followed his instructions. She took turned the key, put the car in drive and took her foot off the brake. Only when she took her foot off the brake, she put in on the accelerator.
"Stop...hit the brake....no the brake."
Samantha finally found the brake and stopped the car. "I did that wrong, didn't I?"
"Get out of the car."
"Alex, come on, how am I suppose to get better if I don't practice. You weren't born knowing how to drive."
"Get out of the car, Samantha."
Samantha unbuckled her seat belt and got out of the car. She walked around to the passenger side and got back in. "So you don't think I'm ready for my driving test yet?"
"Stick with public transportation, Samantha."
John was at Samantha's door when Alex dropped her off. "What are you doing here?"
"I came to visit you."
"I thought you guys were still on tour."
"We are, but we have a three day break. I thought maybe we could catch up."
"John, why don't you go to Buffalo and spend some time with Carly. I'm sure she wants to see you." John had told Samantha that the reason Carly wasn't going on tour with them was because they were going to separate for a while. Give her a chance to go to school and John time to do his music thing. Samantha had been upset by the news but hoped they would work things out.
"She is busy with school. I talked to her last week and she told me that she passed all of her mid terms. She is determined to become an elementary school teacher for some unknown reason."
"It's important to her, just like music is important to you." Samantha unlocked her door and invited John in. "Do you want anything? Something to drink or eat maybe?"
"Are you going to be cooking it?"
"Shut up or I will put you back outside."
John held up his hands in surrender. "No more cooking jokes. So what were you and Alex out doing today?"
"He was teaching me how to drive, but I think I am going to have to find someone else to instruct me from now on."
With his astonishment showing, John asked, "You still don't know how to drive?"
"Well, I really never needed to learn until now. I mean when I first turned sixteen I was practically on my way to Buffalo. There I really didn't need to drive because I could walk wherever I wanted to go."
"So now you decided you want to know how to drive?"
"Before I really didn't have the money for a car and insurance and things like that, but now my career in going well. Don't get me wrong I can't afford a Porch or Ferrari, but something sensible would be nice."
"Why isn't Alex going to teach you anymore?"
Samantha smiled her shy smile. "I think I may have scared him today. I hit one mailbox and he just started flipping out on me."
John laughed and kissed the top of Samantha's head. "If he won't teach you how to drive, I will."
"When are you ever going to have time? Your career is booming now, I here your song on the radio all the time and now I hear you will be writing a song for a movie. Have I told you that I am so proud of you."
"Not lately."
"Well, I am. I will be able to tell all my friends that I knew you when."
"You mean you will be able to tell them you know me."
"Yeah, I guess I will."
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