"I'm sorry, but I don't think I can go any faster than this," he said through gritted teeth.
The hospital finally came into view, and with a sigh she said, "Finally, I was thinking we'd never get there..."
Shaking his head, he parked the car quickly. Nicole got out of the car before him and slamming the door she ran up to the hospital doors, with Nick close behind her.
He raced past her to the reception area and putting his fist down he asked, "Where is Brian Littrell?" to a startled nurse.
"Um, I..." she stuttered, obviously recognizing him.
"Nick..." said someone behind him. He turned to find Kevin and Lauren standing right there in front of him, with A.J and Annie standing just a few feet away.
"Oh, good, it's you. What happened?"
Lauren and Kevin looked at each other, then Lauren said, "Brian was driving Rye home when he had a heart attack, which caused the accident..."
"Oh my God..." Nick whispered.
"Rye got out of it safely, just a few bruises, and she also hit her head really bad. But she's ok..." she continued. "Brian, however... well, his heart got affected the most by the accident, and he came in unconscious. They're going to do the heart surgery as soon as possible, because it's the only thing they can do to save him..."
Nick didn't say anything, just stared straight ahead. Then he turned around and walked slowly outside. He thought he heard someone calling his name, but he didn't care, he just wanted to be alone...
"I checked outside and he's nowhere in sight," said Kevin breathlessly, as he ran to them. "Not even his car is there, which means he definitely left."
"Where do you think he could have gone?" asked Howie, who had just come a few minutes ago.
"No idea... but he was really upset..." said Kevin shaking his head.
They started to suggest places, only Nicole stayed quiet. She was staring hard at something, as if concentrating.
"I think I know where he is..." she said softly, surprising everyone else, who looked at her curiously. She didn't say anything else as she walked out of the hospital, ready to call a cab.
Nick stared up at the dark sky bearing no expression, yet inside he was deep in thought. ''What would he do without his best friend? Why was it that Nicole had to hate him? Was Brian going to die? Was Nicole ever going to believe him...''
These thoughts were clearly centered on Brian and Nicole, the two people he had cared about the most... he had just lost one of them, could it be possible that he'd lose Brian, too?
He looked around him and stared at the willow tree he was sitting next to. Memories flashed back as he remembered this was the place he had first met Nicole... he smiled as he remembered how awkward it was... he suddenly felt a hand on his shoulder and he stood up, startled to see who it was.
It was Nicole, who whispered, "Hi... I was sure you'd be here..." she sat down next to where he was sitting. He looked at her for a few seconds, not believing she had actually come here... he slowly sat back down.
She continued, "I remember... how when we first met you told me you always came here when you wanted to be alone..."
He stared at her, then turning away bitterly, he asked softly, "Why did you come?"
She hesitated, then answered sincerely, "I was worried..." he turned to look at her again, with questioning eyes. "I-I wanted to know how you were doing, how you're handling all this..."
His eyes clouded, then he answered, "I don't know... I just can't stop thinking about how I couldn't resist losing someone else I cared about for the second time..."
There was a silence, as they both stared at each other. Nicole couldn't help thinking about how sensitive he was, how sweet, and how much she missed him. She turned around and fingered one of the long stems of the weeping willow, wanting to cry along with it. She turned to face Nick again, who was still looking at her. She smiled and said, "I never knew you had lost someone else in the first place..."
Nick looked surprised, then with a smile he whispered, "Do you really mean that?"
"Shhh..." she whispered, bringing Nick to her arms into a warm hug.
Nick continued to hold her as he cried softly, knowing that the worse was yet to come...
Nicole held him tight, letting him cry on her shoulder. She didn't know what this meant for their relationship, but she knew she didn't want to lose him...
Ryan ann opened her eyes slowly and looked around her, blinking from the blaring light that seemed to come from the windows. She tried to remember just where exactly she was, and then suddenly it all came back to her, and a silent tear rolled down her cheek as she remembered the events of the previous night...
"Oh my God..." she cried softly. She cried for a while, letting the tears flow, making no effort in wiping them away, when she heard a knock, and then the door open.
"Hi..." said Nick uncertainly. She could see his eyes were red, as if he had had no sleep at all.
Taking a deep breath, she asked slowly, "How-how is he, Nick?"
Nick hesitated before answering, and then said, "He's unconscious, Rye, in a coma.."
She bit her lip, then asked, "But what about the heart surgery? Weren't they going to go through that?"
"Yeah they were," he replied slowly, "And they did... it was all during the night, 6 long hours of waiting... but apparently," he said, feeling the lump in his throat growing bigger, "it didn't help much," he said bitterly. "The doctors say it's too soon to know just how his body is responding, but they think the fact that he's unconscious is definitely-a bad sign..." he said, faltering at the last words. He himself had not believed the doctor when he had told them, had been ready to cry...
He looked at Ryan ann, who put her head down and looked up at the ceiling. She kept her eyes intent on it, then without turning her head, she whispered, "I need to be alone right now, Nick..."
Nick nodded, with a look of understanding, and closing the door softly behind him, he left. He felt his eyes slowly well up with tears as he remembered how his best friend was in a matter of life and death, and they wouldn't even let him see him. He stood there, holding the wall for support, then closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and opened them again, hoping he could somehow stop the flow of tears that he could feel coming... he felt a soft hand touch him on lightly on his shoulder, and he turned around, seeing it was Nicole, who had been waiting outside for him. She smiled softly, and he put his arms around her as he freed the tears he had wanted to get rid of... "I love you, Nicole..." he whispered to her in between sobs.
He continued to cry on her shoulder when he heard her soft voice whisper, "I love you, too... and I forgive you..."
A couple of hours had gone by, yet it felt like years to Rye, lying in that hospital bed all alone, staring at the cieling. She heard the door softly open, but she made no effort to turn her head again.
"Ryan ann..." said Lauren. She kept her eyes glued to the ceiling, however, and started humming softly under her breath.
"Look, I know you probably want to be alone right now, but I just thought I'd check on how you were doing."
She got no reply. She sighed, then said, "The doctor told me he thinks you should go see Brian now, only you, since you seemed to be the closest. You have to try to get him back to us, Rye..."
Ryan ann slowly turned her head to look at Lauren. Lauren continues, "This is kind of a rare case, and his emotions might have nothing to do with his coma, of course, but they say there's hope, Rye... will you come with me?"
Rye just kept on staring at her, then she nodded slowly, and Lauren smiled. "Ok, let's go... Brian needs you..."
"Ok, here we are..." Lauren said opening the door slowly.
"I-I don't want to go in..." Rye whispered. She couldn't bare to see him practically lying on his deathbed... no wait, he's not going to die... he promised...
"Are you sure? He needs you in there.." said Lauren.
"No, I'll go in..." she said taking a deep breath. She watched as Lauren walked down the hall, then pushing the door open slowly, Rye walked in.
What she saw totally broke her heart... Brian was lying unconscious on the bed, with a breathing mask covering his face. There was a silence in the room, the only sound coming from the constant 'beep' sound coming from one of the many machines his arms were hooked up to. He looked so vulerable lying there, she wanted to cry so badly, to pull him away from all those machines and bring him back to be the full of life and love Brian she knew...
She got closer, and sat down on the chair she had gotten so familiar with all the days she had come to see him. For a moment, she was afraid to speak, to say anything. Then, her voice breaking as she tried not to cry, she said, "Hi..."
There was a silence, the only reply she got was the monotonous sound of the beep, and she cried as the full realization hit her that he was not going to reply to her...
"Brian..." she whispered, a few minutes later, looking at him. "I know you can hear me, at least I wish you could..."
"You know, it wouldn't be fair if you left us, we need you.. I need you..." she said softly, leaning closer to his ear. "After all, you promised me you'd live, Brian, remember... remember?" she said a little louder, feeling the tears welling up again.
She sank on the floor beside his bed, pushing the chair away. She reached for his hands, and shivered because they felt so cold...
Her fingers started to stroke his unmoving hand, then she kissed it softly, one small tear falling on it...
Her eyes caught the ring in her hand, and she smiled as she remembered him giving it to her that previous night. "Hey..." she whispered, "I'm supposed to marry you someday so you now have a really good excuse to not leave me..." the smile disappeared slowly, and reaching for her ring, she slipped it out of her finger to put it in his small finger, kissing it after she slipped it in. "I love you..." she whispered as the tears started coming out uncontrollably, wishing she could help him come out of this somehow...
© 1999 fanfic4all@yahoo.com
