All About CrazySteff

Some of my general interests are fishing, camping, reading, cross-stitching, pen pals, chatting on ICQ, making webpages, internet contests and games, INTERNET, INTERNET, INTERNET !!!
I think I am addicted. :-)
I love anything Sci-Fi. The Sci-Fi Channel is the only channel I watch unless a baseball game is on. I love "Babylon 5," "The Invisible Man," "Farscape," "Lexx," "First Wave," "Prey," and "The Outer Limits."

I am a Christian by choice. No one forced my beliefs on me, and no one "brainwashed" me into believing. I will admit that for a long time I turned my back on God and my Christian lifestyle. I thought I knew it all and could take care of myself. It wasn't until I hit rock bottom and finally turned back to the Lord as a last resort that I found out that He really does exist and He really does love me.

Although I've been a Christian practically all of my life, I still consider myself to be a "newbie" Christian, because I'm just really learning to trust God and let things go. I still curse alot, I listen to and like secular music, I smoke. I know from previous experience that my need for those things will gradually pass away as I grow in my faith.

I feel the need to explain this, not to shove it on anyone or to try to act like a "holy roller," but to address this fact: I know that I'm a fountain of contradictions right now. I don't want it to affect someone's outlook on God or other Christians in an adverse way just because I say I'm a Christian yet still do some of these bad things. The fact is, I had these habits for years, and it will take time for me to break them. I know some things I do are wrong, but it is between me and my Savior and not for anyone else to judge.

I have taken down The Dark Side of Me and My Connection to Trent because I don't really feel this way anymore. However, I will be linking it to my testimonial page once I make it, if only to show the state of mind one can fall into when one loses faith. Yes it is bad, yes it has curse words, yet this is where I was for a few years and I cannot reconstruct those feelings in writing because I do not feel that way anymore. is not really bad except for the fact that it is pure idol worship. I think it is an important chapter in my life, and I'm leaving it as yet another example. Besides, I still like NIN and think Trent is a genius. So, read on if you wish, but remember I no longer feel that way. It is history, yet it's an important lesson in faith.

As far as I'm concerned, music can be classified into 2 categories: music I like and music I don't like. I listen to a variety of music including metal, industrial, goth, alternative, techno, pop, classic rock, etc. Most music I like because of the depth and meaning in the lyrics: the feeling that I'm actually being touched, music that makes me think and feel something, instead of just mindless celebration of sex, drugs, and rock and roll. Other music I like just because of the good memories it brings to mind. For example, a band or song might make me think of college days or another good memory in my life, so I will listen to it, even if I think some of it is kind of lame now.

My current, and all-time favorite band is Nine Inch Nails . Trent Reznor is a genius. His music and lyrics have touched my life in a very special way. I have made it through some pretty crappy times listening to NIN and hanging on to the music. Thanks for not being afraid to share your soul, Trent!

I absolutely love the band Marilyn Manson! Their music is not always about what everyone assumes that it is. I have all the CDs (so far), and I like them all. I will admit there are some songs that I am not comfortable with, being a Christian, but overall, M.M. is a great band! Ginger Fish is the best darned drummer on earth!

On Marilyn personally, I am still thoroughly impressed with his writing ability. In his Auto-Bio, the way he could be serious, funny, sensitive, and hateful, all in one story, amazed me. There was plenty of humor as well as some sensitive, private moments of his life. As for the songs, I can relate to a lot of it on a very personal level. I really respect Marilyn as a musician and a writer.

Other artists I like enough to mention are Enigma, Third Eye Blind, Dishwalla, Collective Soul, Cake, Creed, Goo Goo Dolls, Pride and Glory, Zakk Wylde, Ozzy Osbourne, U2, Sheryl Crow, Matchbox 20, GodSmack, Disturbed, Deftones and believe it or not, Madonna (gotta dance to something). There are other bands I like, but who can remember them all? I mostly listen to NIN and Marilyn Manson so...