Julia lowered her glaring gaze, wished that she could focus on the surf or the great lawn but no they were here under the canopy of a tree. She knew that he'd always been afraid of her, her intellect, her personal power and more than that, her knowledge of him and his need of her. He required her and that had unnerved him terribly. Willie was an acceptable protector but not as valiant a one as she turned out to be. He needed someone with wits, initiative and generally unclouded judgment. Or if there was a cloud, it was in his favor. He had it in spades with Julia. He counted on it. That was why he never touched her, took her blood even when she offered it. "I know that your hostility when we first met was born out of fear."

"It lingered. I feared what you could do to me. Then I feared your devotion." Barnabas lowered his head. He could reach her hand if she'd allow it. And for those first few months, he feared she would destroy him. Or at least that accursed part of him did, the man deep within knew she would not. She might chain him away and throw away the key but she never seriously contemplated a stake through his heart. "I've never understood it, how or why you'd care for someone so accursed. And you did it freely-"

"You confound me. Most men yearn for a devoted woman, you want one," Her voice caught as tears she thought long shed threatened. "Anyone but me it seems."

"Why do you love me?" He asked while taking her hand. He felt the last remnants of her energy fade, the resistance to this conversation leave. It was time.

"Do you think if I knew, I wouldn't have tried to exercise it? One day I thought you an exciting medical curiosity, and almost the next, I thought, no I **felt**-- more. Damn Dave Woodard and his little jibe! All the while you were insufferable, cruel and calculating. Why fall in love with that?" She stared out as if there were no branches and leaves barring her vision. "What I feel for you is probably one of the unhealthiest embodiments of love I've ever encountered. I've prescribed analysis for myself many a time! I really should've seen a psychiatrist but who was going to believe my tale? Falling in love with patients or patients for their doctors happens, it's happened to me. But I couldn't go to a colleague - tell him, 'Yes, I am in love with my patient and by the way, he is a vampire.' I would've been locked up!"

Now he could smile at the thought of Julia lying on a couch confessing this dilemma. He held and patted her hand, reaching up to lift her chin. "Why did you fall in love with me then? I could barely stand myself let alone believe someone fine and good could care for me."

"There are many reasons, perhaps my lonely childhood? Your desperate attachment to those long gone, perhaps subconsciously, it's how I felt about my family. And I wanted someone to feel that for me-Oh, it's a rich question. Maybe it was the feeling that I would never really get you? The ultimate challenge? I've gained everything else I wanted even in the face of hostility, an education, a venerated position, challenging career but not a lasting love-the men I've known were always too dumb or clingy. You weren't dumb nor did you cling to me. In fact you shoved me aside. Who better to love than someone who wouldn't return it? Your needs and demands were medical, I could deal with that but personal needs, caring, intimacy--what is it they say about a fish on a bicycle?" Julia swatted his hand away.

He returned his hands to her body. She stopped fidgeting. His hands fit naturally around her hips. "You sacrifice, I take, I demand." They sat in silence. Far off a car roared up the drive, David yelled from his window to whomever arrived and Carolyn told him to stop yelling. Roger hollered at them both. The light breeze stiffened, it's chill increased. The sun rose high and began to set. Neither figure beneath the green canopy moved except for breath.

At long last, Julia's gaze was averted to the tree trunk. On it were the marks of lovers, trying to give evidence forever of their love and devotion. Were they only Collinses or town kids too on some daring ritual of passage? She made out several initials, C+T=?. That combination was repeated several times, E+P, R+E. She could guess at some of the combinations but not all. Her eye rose to the height of just below 6' to see clearly, 'Barnabas + Julia'. "What?" Julia jumped up. Jolted out of his contemplative state, Barnabas watched Julia approach the tree, touch one of the carvings and frown.

"What is it?" He stood behind her, watching her fingers trace their names. He moved closer.

"Someone was being fanciful." Julia turned, stumbling back against the tree rather than into Barnabas who stood far too close, only a few short inches away. His breath touched her cheek, his gaze focused to the left of her head, at the carving.

He reached up to touch the tree, his arm and hand inches from Julia's face. "I think they were being prophetic."

Chapter 5