Opening Ceremony
Opening Ceremony
by Debi
(Music begins, slowly, a plaintive lament. "Bonny
Portmore" plays
softly as the lights go down. The song ends, a
moment of quiet, then
the lights flash on, abruptly starting "Are You Ready
For This?"
{"Everybody dance now!"}
Onto the stage comes a singular sight: a tandem pogo
stick,
manned/piloted by none other than your humble emcee
and Duncan MacLeod! Said
pogo stick bounces toward the center of the stage and
both participants make
spectacular, death defying dismounts. (Doesn't do to
describe too much, let
the imagination fill it all in) Take bows and Debi
steps to microphone to
deliver welcome address.)
"Ladies and gentlemen, Immortals and Watchers,
mortals and innocent
bystanders, I would like to welcome you all to the
first (dare we say
annual?) Virtual Reality Highlander Convention!
{waits for wild applause
to die down} I am your mistress of the Darkne--
whoops, make that of
Ceremonies, Debi, escorted by the lovely Duncan
MacLeod {all together
now!} of the Clan MacLeod. We have a marvelous
program and schedule of
events for you so, LET'S GET READY TO
RRRRUUUUUMMMBBBLLE!!!
(Stage lights play over the audience as entire con
staff and all the
characters from HL come onto the stage to sing the
theme song "Highlander
Tonight". {Filked by Patt}
Chorus line includes a brace of clones, about a half
dozen each of
kilted Duncan MacLeod's, Methos' in their Bronze -Age
getup, and Amandas of
both the circus/blonde variety and the brunette of
cabaret fame.)
Something familiar,
Something peculiar,
Something for everyone:
Highlander Tonight!
Something appealing,
Something appalling,
Something for everyone:
Highlander Tonight!
Something with kings, something with crowns;
Bring on the lovers, liars and clowns!
Old situations,
New complications,
Nothing portentous or polite;
Reality tomorrow,
Highlander Tonight!
Something convulsive,
Something repulsive,
Something for everyone:
Highlander Tonight!
Plots that keep thick'nin,
With every quick'nin,
Complications everywhere:
Highlander Tonight!
Something with Gods, something with fate;
Weighty affairs will not have to wait!
Something that's formal,
Something that's normal,
Something to drool and thunk about;
Turn on the TV:
Highlander Tonight!
Something erratic,
Something dramatic,
Something for everyone:
Highlander Tonight!
Frenzy and frolic,
Strictly symbolic,
Something for everyone:
Highlander Tonight!
Something that's grim, something that's sweet.
Mac plays Kate later this week.
Bring on the rock stars,
Take us to Joe's bar,
Will Methos ever reappear?
Reality tomorrow:
Highlander Tonight!
Something familiar,
Something peculiar,
Something for everybody:
Highlander Tonight!
Something that's gaudy,
Something that's bawdy --
Something for everybawdy!
Highlander Tonight!
Something that's Dark,
Something that's Light.
Mac defeats evil and does what is right.
Stunning surprises!
Cunning disguises!
Hundreds of swords just out of sight!
Reality tomorrow:
Highlander Tonight!
(Music swells to a resounding climax and ends and
Debi again takes the
microphone to make stage announcements.)
"There's a rumor going around the crowd that the
brown acid is no
good (oops, sorry, wrong festival). I hope that
everyone is settling in nicely
in their rooms. Have a fond look at them and wave
bye-bye to your creature
comforts, 'cause you won't need them here! We never
sleep and we party all the
time, so your rooms are merely glorified warehouses
for your virtual luggage!
You may notice to your left the doorway
to the dealer's area. Browse
around, make your selections while the getting is
good. All the profits from
the sales will go to the Watcher's Retirement Fund
and also to the Home for
Wayward Immortals. Gotta keep an eye on those guys!
(This means you, Kenny!)
Many of you will be delighted to hear
(especially those of you who
organized this thing!) that Joe's is open. There will
be no last call for
alcohol until this con is done!
Dinner will be served soon, many forms
of chicken-like substances will
be available for your consumption and confusion. Just
remember, don't ask to
many questions and it'll taste just fine!
The Jim Byrnes Band/SMELT/Korena
McLinnett Barbershop Band will be
performing directly after dinner. So boogie your
little hearts out!
Joe's will be open all night and we also have
available for your
entertainment, a holodeck, borrowed from our good
friends from the Star Trek
contingent, many of whom are some of us. Just
remember to keep discussions of
events that transpire there PG or take it to e-mail.
This IS a family con.
Lots more stuff where all that came
from; that's just the first night.
Consult the signs and your helpful guides for
directions to the various events
and lectures.
"Hair by Methos" managed by Gisy is booked up, but maybe you
can sweet talk Gisy into a brief
appointment with Mr. Methos. Just watch out for her
sword!
There is also a Reading Room run by Emily and Cheryl. Kick back and read some of the wonderful books they have there.
Duncan will be conducting dance lessons
(ooh, Tango, my favorite!!)
Our Paris end of things, hosted by the
lovely Maroussia is just a
transporter away. Breakfast will be served there
tomorrow morning. Hey, any
barge rides on the schedule? Outfit that puppy with
about a dozen outboards
and we're in business! (After all, this is virtual
reality. We can do anything
we want and it'll work!)
Have fun, tell us what you think and
remember, if you can't be good, try
to be better!
THANK YOU FOR COMING. WE HOPE YOU WILL ENJOY YOUR
STAY
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