DISNEYLAND presents

"Snow White's Scary Adventure"
Page *2*

From there you turn a left and go through the castle's dungeons, where they seem to only imprison the dead. Perhaps there is no crime anymore and therefore no need to imprison anyone. Maybe these skeletons were the last criminals in the Queen's kingdom. If my Queen were as pretty and well dressed as this Queen, I'd behave too.

After the dungeon, you enter the witch's eeeevil laboratory where she is making a poison apple (with a creepy skull design on it) to feed to Snow White. The Queen, thanks to a FRUITY mirror, was under the mistaken impression that Snow White was prettier than she was. The Queen should really have known better than to trust a gay mirror. Maybe Snow White reminded the mirror of a young Judy Garland, that's my only reasoning for why this obviously very blind mirror could think she was prettier than ol' Queenie.

After leaving the lab you pass by the witch in a little sailboat, offering you an eeeevil poison apple from her bucket of eeevil green apples. A scary forest with angry frowning trees, bats, and fearsome toothless wooden alligators armed with speaker cabinets... You see the dwarf's house again and just when you think a grinning midget will be coming up next, the door swings open and it's the witch again and she's armed with an invisible holographic apple! EEEK! I love hearing children cry on this ride, and this section of it is an almost certain kid-traumatizer. From there you turn a corner and see the 7 dwarfs on a hill, about to be crushed by the witch as she is jostling a huge boulder in an effort to have it roll down upon them, this lucky fate is averted when lightning strikes the witch, killing her dead. Then you suddenly take a left turn, happy music plays, and you see an "and they lived happily ever after" sign. WTF?? The Queen is dead! What of her subjects? What will they be told? Probably some damn nazi propaganda about her she was an evil witch who died for vanity after trying to murder a teenage girl. Liars.

Now that the Queen is a corpse, will she be put in prison too?

NO! I DISAPPROVE!

More later. More pictures and words to add. I like this ride.

The Official Disneyland "Snow White" page

Back to my main Disneyland page.

This page hosted by Get your own Free Home Page