Going on Business?

In the kitchen of the flat was among other the other foreign-looking appliances, a front-loading machine that was both a washer and drier made by Zannussi, soon to be called the devil washer. If you have the bad fortune to come across one of these things on your travels, READ THE INSTRUCTIONS COMPLETELY! I learned quickly why the British favor line drying to tumble drying. Expect to take twice the time to dry half a load. To this day, I have earned notoriety among my colleagues on both sides of the Atlantic for using Fairy Liquid, a popular dish detergent, to wash my clothes. At least it got the clothes clean. The laundry detergent, which I used in later washings, was also liquid and had a name of Power Ball, Speed Ball, Roller Ball, or Something Ball.

After forcing myself to stay awake all day by going out and about, I fell asleep, woke up at 1 AM and could not get back to sleep again, the #1 jet lag symptom (ugh). I alternated fitful tossing and turning with reading until the alarm went off. The alarm gave me an excuse to get out of bed. I took a shower and experienced the appropriate scalding one gets from British hot water. (Their hot water is VERY, VERY hot.) After treating the resulting heat blisters, I turned on CNBC on the TV, and went over notes on the project I was working on.

I was advised to take a taxi to the office on the first day, but armed with a Tube map, I wanted to be amongst the people. I noticed the following on my first Tube ride in. Londoners prefer not to hold the railings in the trains, preferring instead to lean against wall panels. A British woman who I work with in San Francisco told me that they do this for sanitary reasons (who knows who or what was holding that railing before you.) The vertical walls on some of the lines taper inward near the top, probably to make the cars more aerodynamic. Not a problem, unless you're tall and you are trying to squeeze onto a crowded train. You're just barely inside, the doors close, and you have nowhere to put your head, so you have to tilt your neck in some peculiar direction to prevent being guillotined by the closing door. Besides annoying to those around you, this is claustrophobic. If you're tall, don't do what I did. Push your way to the center of the car, or at least away from the doors.

The British like to read. Once in the train, everyone was reading something, whether it was the Financial Times, the Sun, the Daily Mail or the latest paperback. Once off the train, pedestrian traffic moves quickly. Prepare for pedestrian chicken. Americans distinguish themselves by using visible Barry Sanders-like moves to continuously dodge the onslaught of oncoming pedestrian traffic (or so the aforementioned British colleague told me). The Barry Sanders moves are the second most obvious hint that you're American. The number one giveaway is wearing sunglasses, which the Brits don't use unless on holiday in the Med. They found mine fascinating.

Once in the Office
Anticipate and respect cultural differences between your US and your UK office, although I learned that there are similarities also. On average, my British colleagues had been in their positions longer than my American colleagues had. Because my English colleagues were less transient in their jobs, they were very knowledgeable about their fields.

I was also told that there were fewer interactions between IT staff and business users in the UK, although this is changing. I was warned that the iterative processes in which users and IT staff communicate many times a day will seem a little foreign to the British. Communication between business users and IT staff in the old days was often by large manuscripts before and after the release of an application, not during the testing. Fortunately, times are changing. For example, the IT person in our group in London sits with the business users.

My mission on this first trip was to train the staff in the office and coordinate user testing on a new system that was being implemented in our London office. I was advised that people would be reserved and timid about asking questions. They weren't. They asked as many intelligent questions (if not more) as their American counterparts. Thankfully, the British have a keen sense of humor (anyone heard of Monty Python?) and aren't as serious in the office (or elsewhere) as many Americans stereotype them to be. In fact, in these days of political correctness and sexual harassment litigation in the US, some things said in the UK office may shock or surprise prudish Americans. Because people speak more softly, the London office was much quieter than our San Francisco office. The Brits think Americans are the loudest people on Earth.

So you left the laptop at home and have found a free PC in the UK office? Welcome to the best distraction from your jet lag: the UK keyboard. Ancillary characters such as back slash, ampersand and the $ sign are in different locations and the left shift key is split in two, with the back slash being one of the keys. The UK spell-checker will drive you crazy as well (insisting on realise not realize, colour not color).

After trying to do your work on the foreign keyboard, you notice it's lunchtime. Where do you go? London has some chains that will be familiar to Yankees, such as McDonalds and KFC. (A Big Mac Value Meal is a little less than the US, difference being you get a smaller drink with 2 small ice cubes in the UK.) Have been told that the London lunch hour is from 1 to 2, unless I'm in town and then it's whenever I go to lunch, judging from the crowds. In the City, there are zillions of little tiny sandwich places. Keep in mind that a sandwich in the UK is meat on buttered bread cut into 4 neat little triangles. If the sandwich advertises salad, you get lettuce on it, maybe. Jacket potatoes are baked potatoes with an assortment of toppings ranging from tomatoes to white beans to chili. Also popular are pre-made sandwiches sold in triangular clear hard plastic containers. Unlike their American counter-parts, these are often quite creative, featuring things such as chicken tikka, and Thai basil shrimp salad. The Brits must go through more transparent triangular plastic containers then all other countries put together.