It’s another normal day. There’s romance in the air, I know Tifa and Aeris want me! The problem is there both just so sexy! It's the 13th February, the day before valentine's (erk!) and Tifa takes me to the enchanted forest, where's there's beautiful trees, cool birds and all but Tifa wanted to ask me something, I dunno.

Tifa: You know I need to ask you something, right?

Cloud: Yeah! So what is it?

Tifa: Well…

She started to blush, A LOT!

Tifa: Since there's a disco tomorrow at the gold saucer and it's valentines day. Can you take me?

OH GOD! Oh what the heck should I do? £$%^! Oh all right, I thought, why not?

Cloud: Sure! Why not? I'm not doing anything tomorrow, how 'bout 7:30 pm?

Tifa: Oh cool! Thank you Cloud!

She ran right up to me and gave me a long, passonating kiss. Man, it felt so good! I didn't want it to end.

Later, Aeris came to see me in her room in Costa de Sol. She was wearing such a sexy dress!

Aeris: You busy tomorrow at 5 pm?

I thought for a moment! My date with Tifa was at 7:30 pm so no.

Cloud: No. However, I'm not free at 7:30 pm.

Aeris: That's okay. Because I want to ask if you want to go to dinner at 5 tomorrow in the new restaurant in the Gold Saucer. Wanna go?

OH MY GOD! I'm in an arwkard position! Damn! Oh well, I better go!

Cloud: Course. That restaurant has amazing food!

Aeris: Oh thank you Cloud!

This was so weird. She ran up to me like Tifa and gave me a long, passonating kiss, plus that felt just as good!

The next day, 4:53 pm, I'm in my room getting ready and Cait Sith walks in.

Cait Sith: YO! What you doin' Cloud?

Cloud: Getting ready for my date with Aeris.

Cait Sith: Don't you have one with Tifa?

Cloud: Well yeah! I'm gonna go out with both of them and see who should be my girlfriend. But should I take the buster sword or not?

Cait Sith: Yeah! Cuz' you never know what's gonna happen!

5:30 pm, the restaurant of the gold saucer.

Aeris: Hey Cloud. WOW! When you where those clothes and look like that, I feel like having sex with you like THAT!

Cloud: Yo! We're in public and that's not you!

Aeris: Oh, I'm sorry. He he.

Barret: Your damn order?

Cloud: You're the waiter?

Barret: I'm trying ta make cash so shat ap! Orders?

Cloud: Oh, a kebab, chips, beans and your best wine!

Barret: *&^% order. Aeris?

Aeris: Same as Cloud.

Barret: Dunno why 'am working in this hell hole! Comin' up!

Aeris: Isn't he being rude?

Cloud: Dammit Aeris! You ever heard him swear? Yo! Hurry up!

Barret: Shut it! It's coming!

A bit later after our meal. It was chocobo-sized meal.

Aeris: You sure you are gonna pay?

Cloud: I'm supposed to. It's a man's thing.

Barret: All right, 7890 gil.

Cloud: Damn! Oh all right. Here, and a tip.

Barret: £$%^! Whoa, 6999 gil.

It was 6:45 pm and I was getting ready for the date with Tifa.

7:30 pm, the disco and Tifa's wearing such a sexy dress!

Tifa: Whoa! What a cool disco!

Cloud: It is kinda cool! Wanna drink? Cuz' I'm getting a beer.

Tifa: Can I have some wine?

Cloud: Sure!

When I got up to the counter.

Cloud: VINCENT?

Vincent: What the…? Ho, hi Cloud!

Cloud: What you doing here?

Vincent: Money thing, need some cash. Also get to see people dance. …. Oh yes, your order?

Cloud: Wine and beer.

Vincent: Comin' up.

Tifa gets into an argument with punks called Max and Jessie.

Jessie: Loner!

Tifa: Am not. I have a sexy boyfriend!

Max: Yeah sure.

Jessie: Jerk.

Tifa: Get lost sad jerks!

Max: What? That's it. Time to feel pain Toffee.

I overhear Tifa screaming. I rush over as quick as possible.

Cloud: Leave over alone you b******!

Jessie: This is your sexy boyfriend? HAH! What a wuss!

Cloud: Leave her outta this! Max: All right.

He shoves me into the wall and battle begins.

Cloud: That's it. Time for battle. Magic, wall.

Max: Sense!

Cloud. Level 99. HP: 9999 MP: 999

I sensed him. Max. Level 98. HP: 9999 MP: 991

I wanted my date to last so I made it quick.

Tifa: Cloud, Help!

Cloud: Don't worry Tifa! Knights of the Round.

All 13 knights came and attacked the idiotic idiots. After the attack!

Max: What the heck was that jerk!?!

Cloud: Shut up and get outta here or feel it again!

Max and Jessie: We're outta here!

Tifa: Thanks Cloud!!!

Tifa gave me another long, passonating kiss!

Cloud: Oh yeah! Here is your wine.

Tifa: Oh yeah,. I forgot to give you this.

Tifa gave me this cool ring of my buster sword.

Cloud: Thanks Tifa. I'll wear it when you want me to!

I had a gift for Tifa too. Her gift reminded me about it.

Cloud: Tifa, I have a gift for you too. Here!

Tifa: Oh thank you Cloud. It's beautiful!

The gift was a necklace with a heart on it. We started dancing. Somehow, everyone was watching us dancing round the hall, cheering at the same time. The final posse was incredible, the fire works started and it was beautiful. We finished with a long kiss.

Later at 1 am as we were walking out, we bumped into Aeris.

Cloud: Oh. …. Erm, Hi Aeris.

Aeris: Hey Cloud. Hi Tifa, can I have a word.

Tifa: Sure. Cloud?

Cloud: Oh yeah.

I went to a balcony just to see what was going on.

Aeris: Why you taking Cloud away from me you $%^£&*^%?

Tifa: You took him from me!

Aeris: NO! WE WENT ON A DATE!

Tifa: YEAH! SO DID WE!

Uh-oh! Battle commences! Aeris draws her staff! She casts Alexander on Tifa. Distaster! Tifa casts Bio 3 on Aeris. OH GOD! I gotta stop it. I drew my sword ready for battle.

Cloud: GRRRR! Soldier Dive.

Aeris and Tifa: OH NO!

Cloud: Bolt all!

Aeris and Tifa: OW!

Cloud: What's going on here? At the same time, Tifa and Aeris were talking gibberish about the dates.

Cloud: Uh yeah. Thanks.

Aeris: You gotta choose one of us. Who's it gonna be? Me?

Cloud: No. I'm sorry Aeris but it's Tifa who I'm gonna choose.

Tifa: Really?

Cloud: Yeah. And I'm sorry I went out with Aeris as well as you. May I make it up like? Oh I dunno, this?

I started to give Tifa a passonating kiss. Aeris started walking into the background crying. Oh well, I least I know who I'm gonna go out with now!

Aeris: I'll kill you Tifa. I'll train hard and kill you and get the man I deserve.