December 11

Here it is Thursday, already. *sigh* Before he left for work this morning, Jevim suggested I do my packing today, so he could help me squeeze in what won't fit tonight, instead of waiting til the last minute. Tomorrow night is the company Christmas party, and Saturday morning, I fly out of here.

As I locked the door behind him when he left, I felt a rush of tears coming on. I don't want to go home... Yes, I know on Monday I was packing, and wanting to leave, but I'd spent the day getting angry, and I was being stupid. I wish he could have stayed home from work today, just to give us a little more time together. I wish we hadn't wasted Sunday... I wish, I wish, I wish. I wish I knew when we'd be able to see each other again, too... right now, that's pretty vague. Spending so much time with him these past several months while he's co-oped has been so nice, but I think it's spoiled both of us terribly.

I managed to keep myself together at the airport last time I had to go; I'm not so sure I can this time. I'm sitting here teary-eyed just thinking about leaving. I already did my packing -- at least as much as can reasonably be done with two more days before I leave. I still have to get my discs and stuff together and grab all the files that have migrated onto his computer, but once that is done, I'll be done for the day. It's only just before ten in the morning, so I don't know what I'm going to do for the next seven hours.

12:10pm

Well, I've managed to keep myself entertained for a couple hours, anyway; I took a bath and finished reading a book I'd bought while I was here, and I got my pages signed up to join Open Pages, finally. I'd love to join Archipelago, but number one, I don't think my site is up to snuff, and number two, Lucy isn't accepting any more journals right now. Maybe by time she is, I'll feel like I'm more ready to join. We'll see... Anyway, I caught up reading her journal, Aries Moon, yesterday, so I'm hunting around for more to read. But for now, I want to get this stuff posted, send an e-mail off to the OP ringmistress, and make myself some lunch! TTYL...

3:06pm

Well, I've been busy poking around... I put a link to a page with a Java applet that displays missing and abducted children, in hopes that maybe someone will take the time to look and see someone they know, and I finally got to the queue of the "Ring of Her Own" and saw that my entry was no longer there. At least, I thought I had submitted an entry, but I don't remember ever hearing back from them; the queue is empty, and I'm not in the index. Oh well... when I get home, I'll double check and see if I really did submit my site. If I did, then I guess they didn't want my journal; no big deal. If not, I'll submit it and see what they say.

I've decided to put a new set of pages up on my ISP's server; I've neglected to do anything with it for a long time, because my former friends considered them "the enemy", and of course I wanted to keep my friends. Maybe it will help me get to know some new people in town, or even find some acquaintances from my BBS days. At any rate, it certainly can't hurt anything.

I started working on ideas for it this afternoon, but I haven't hit on anything yet that really tickles my fancy. Maybe that's where I'll put my writing site... *shrug* (fiction, not my journal), or maybe I'll just move the majority of my Heartland GeoCities stuff there; their new "ad" pages are getting extremely annoying, and they mess with IE 4's "back" function as well.

Jevim will be home in a couple hours, and I want to get the cat cross-stitch I bought in West Virigina done for my mom before I get home (her birthday was the 9th), so I'm off to work on that. TTYL....