My Hero!

Yes, there are some great men out there - and some of them are available, too. But not my Mark. Not anymore.


Our First Date


I met my husband, the man of my dreams, on Saturday, December 17, 1996. It was a blind date because I had answered his personal ad (yes, those things really do work). We met for breakfast at 10:00 am (the first available time for both of us). It was a sunny morning and, miraculously for New England, not too cold.

Leading up to this day was a series of phone calls. I had responded to his ad on a Monday, leaving a voice mail message as instructed. He called me back on Tuesday (a little out of breath because he had been working out). The conservation was comfortable from the beginning and we were on the phone for an hour and a half! I haven't the slightest idea any more what we talked about, but I remember laughing and I remember feeling really comfortable being myself with him.

I also remember he asked me what he referred to as the $50,000 question and what my $50,000 answer was. He asked me why a woman like me (I must have impressed him so far!) wasn't married? Well, instead of giving him the $.25 answer that I might have at another time in my life - I just haven't met the right man - I told him the truth.

The truth was that up until recently, I had not been in a place to do what would be necessary to be in a long term committed relationship. I had not been willing to let a man get really close to me and see who I was nor was I willing to take the risk to really care about someone else. I added that I now knew I was ready to do whatever it took to be successful in a relationship. (for more about that process read my the Family of Women page)

At the end of that first phone call we arranged to meet.



On Saturday I was nervous while waiting at the agreed place. I had arrived early and was walking around and pacing a bit, wondering about every man who passed by. Could that be him? Oh, I hope that's not him…. Little did I know that he had picked a spot from which to watch for me. Very sneaky! As he tells the story, when he saw me arrive, he hoped that I was the one he was waiting for - so cute!

After confirming our identities, we went for breakfast at a small restaurant that attracts a large college crowd. Conversation flowed easily. I remember listening to him talk and thinking "I wonder how he kisses?" I had to smile at that thought. It definitely was a good sign. We didn't notice how long we had sat there or how busy the place had gotten until they asked us for our table back. When the check arrived Mark said "I am having a wonderful time and would like to pay for this." Gallant!! I agreed, of course. (I never discourage chivalry - as a rule!).

I was now about 11:30. We walked around the area for a bit and finally went into HMV Record Store. Browsing up and down the aisles, we shared with each other our favorite recordings and groups, talking about memories that each one brought back. Mark loved all types of music, but especially the rock of the 60's and 70's. Me too! More good signs.

After a while we wandered into the classical music section where it was quieter and easier to talk. There were listening couches set up along the perimeter. We sat… and talked for the next two hours. It was wonderful.

Of course, as before, I don't remember anything specific that we said to each other during this time. Although I do know that we made plans to get together again the next night for dinner and again on Thursday when we both had the day off and I was going to be flying home later for the holidays (yes, he drove me to the airport!)

It was nearly 2:00 by this time, and I had plans to meet a friend at 2. Mark walked me to the subway. When we got there I said

"I just have one question I need you to answer for me."

"What's that?" he asked.

"What's your last name?"

Yes, in all that time and with all that talking, we had never exchanged this simple piece of information! He told me his. I told him mine.

The subway was arriving. We could hear it. He looked at me and said "May I kiss you?" Sigh! That was wonderful, but even more wonderful was the kiss that followed when I said "Yes."

The subway came.

The subway went.

I was late to meet my friend. And, the poor thing, all she heard about was Mark, Mark, Mark for the rest of the afternoon.

What to know more? Okay, just click...
Five wonderful months and then...


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