Sarah's Survivors Page


A place for survivors of sexual assault

I won my court case

Hatred surrounds me wherever I go
all my hope is lost from your little show
Hatred for all things mostly for trust
the evil keeps lurking and hides where it must
Each shread of dignity falls piece by piece
chemical substances are my release
It seems rape is accepted, the victim is wrong
trying to change your mind just takes to damn long
I just try not to think about whats going on
We use violence to fight for a violated person
a victim, a survivor, a liar, a whore
I am sick of these words I have heard all before
I respect those who care for my life more than me
they do what they can to get me to be free
To fight violence with violence just doesn't seem right
though I may be wrong I think this late at night
I am hopelessly trying to make sense of my thoughts
there is nothing to do but you keep doing lots
I just go with the flow and hope for the day
when my memories are erased of when he had his way
You've all had your say and you've said it out loud
I'm a whore
I'm a slut
I deserved what I got
I wanted it more than anything else
I lie
I'm diseased
I could have fought back
I'm stronger than him, that rapist named Matt
Well fuck all of you
you've made yourselves clear
I've heard your opinions and I don't share your view
Go fuck yourselves I know that you can
you've done it before and you'll do it again
I sit here and hate all life around me
I'm hurting enough so just let me be
If I had my way I'd kill each one of you
when I was done I would kill myself too
Fuck you I wish you had never been born
my heart still beats even though it's been torn
Would things be easir if I were dead?
It could be arranged
I'll do it myself to erase all the pain
But first I have just one thing to say
two words to make all the pain go away
Fuck you and fuck you I hope that you die
Fuck you, you know and I know that you lie
And fuck you, I hope that your happy now
Fuck you, you bastard, just go right to hell

by Sarah Gardner

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