virtue



	What is virtue? Webster's Dictionary defines it as "conformity to moral law; uprightness; rectitude: a commendable quality: chastity." As Christian women, it goes deeper than that. Virtue is the woman's inner beauty that comes from purity of heart, mind and life with a sincere love and dedication to God and His Word. God's Word gives us instructions as to what is virtuous of a woman, and we will cover them in this booklet.
	Our study takes us to the very beginning of God's Word. "So God created man in His own image; in the image of God created He him; male and female created He them." Genesis 1:27. No matter what people may tell us, or how they may interpret the Scripture you must remember that you are created in God's image and are worthy of honor and respect. Anyone who violates that, violates God's Word. From this passage we can gather that male and female are two aspects of one whole, two halves designed to come together and compliment each other. "And the Lord God said, 'It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.' And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man." Genesis 2:18, 21-22. Woman was created as a companion and helper to the man, because God saw that it was not good for the man to be alone. Many people interpret the fact that God used a rib from the man to symbolize that the woman is to be cherished and held close to the heart. This is admirable, but I see no indications of this. Why God chose a rib, He alone knows, and if you want to hold this idea I see no problem with it.
	"And Adam said, 'This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.' Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed." Genesis 2:23-25. This is a beautiful picture of purity and innocence -- the original ideal for marriage. Adam recognized Eve as his body, an extension of himself. For the two of them this was literally true. For us today, we are to adopt this mindset through the union of marriage. Once we are married we are to consider each other as ourselves -- we are one flesh in the eyes of God. "The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife." 1 Corinthians 7:4. Once we are married, we alone do not have control over own bodies, but share it with our spouse. As humans, our bodies are our most private 'possession.' I believe that Paul is expressing just how equal this marriage partnership is. Not even our body is exempt. I would even hazard to go so far as to say our minds are included. Paul expresses in this passage the importance of not defrauding each other with our bodies, and is not our mind part of our body? We should guard our thoughts, for if we indulge in sinful thoughts eventually it will lead to sinful behaviour with our bodies.
	"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord." Ephesians 5:22. This is probably one of the most controversial passages in Scripture. As women the idea of submitting to anyone is very distasteful, even humiliating. Today's society does not help. All around us there are women's groups telling us to stand up for our rights and to quit letting men trample us under foot. It is true that a lot of times the male-dominated world has been oppressive to women, but we have to put that behind us. The Bible tells us that we are to submit. This passage goes on to say, "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church." It is the man's responsibility to love his wife, to nourish and cherish her. Often this is neglected when preaching on 'submission.' But throughout Scripture the Lord usually does not give commands to one without commands for the other. If the husband loves his wife in accordance to this passage, then submission by the wife comes much easier. In fact, most women desire to please their husbands, and this desire increases when they feel loved and valued by their husband. In my own marriage I have found that my husband does not understand this. Not only is he a man with the male mentality, but he is a former marine and drill sergeant which means he also has a military mentality. I think it is interesting that Paul specifically tells husbands to love their wives. I would venture to say he is telling the husbands to show love to their wives. From my own experience, and from talking to other girl friends, most men do not know how, or take the time, to show their love. My husband has told me that he didn't realize that cards were important to me, and that he thought I just assumed he loves me. I've tried to impress on him how important little expressions of love are to me. It's a slow process. I think that this is why Paul tells the husbands to love their wives -- God understands the differences between men and women, and that women need this love and need it expressed. This makes it easier for the woman to submit to her husband. It is important to note, though, that these are commands which are unconditional. We are not told to submit to our husbands only if they love us, we are to submit regardless.
	This brings up another question that is being raised these days; is a woman to submit to an abusive husband? All I can give is my opinion, for the Bible does not directly deal with this situation. If a husband is abusive, I feel that it falls under the verse, "And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife." 1 Corinthians 7:13-14a. A husband who is abusive is most likely unsaved, even if he has said he is. In anything that is not contrary to God's Word, or is not dangerous to you physically, that it is expected for you to submit to your husband. If your life is threatened by staying with your husband, you should seek help. Hopefully you have a church to act as a supportive family group who will help you find a place to stay, if necessary, and to try to arrange counseling for you and your husband. More importantly, they should be helping you pray for your husband. You and he by yourselves can do nothing to solve the situation -- only God can make the necessary changes. You are to make every effort, and be persistant, to reconcile this relationship with your husband. It is not an excuse to simply leave. You must continue in prayer and follow the leading of the Holy Spirit.
	What about single women? In 1 Corinthians 11:3 it says, "But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God." Whether you are married or single, the divine order is that the man is the head of the woman. It only makes sense -- Adam was created first, then Eve. The divine order is not set up to indicate superiority or inferiority, it is simply the order God ordained. Throughout the Bible we have examples of women serving God as equals; Deborah was a judge over the nation of Israel, Miriam served with her brothers Moses and Aaron as a leader of Israel, Priscilla taught the young Apollos with her husband Aquila. Galatians 3:28 says, "There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus." We as women are to submit to the leadership of men, not because we are inferior, but because this is the order God designed. As single women, however, the same amount of submission is not required of you. You are to respect the leadership of the church, as well as that of your father.
	Why is the subject of submission so important? Due to God's divine order, placing the man as head of the woman, that man is held responsible for the actions of that woman, be it his wife or his daughter. It is our responsibility as women to help them meet this expectation. We must quit seeing it as oppression and see it as our divine calling. This doesn't mean that it is easy, but with the help of the Holy Spirit we can do what God expects of us. Romans 12:18-21 says, "If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men. Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, 'Vengence is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.' Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head. Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good." If the men in leadership over you are abusing the submission issue, then by continuing to obey God's Word, even though it is distasteful, you will 'heap coals of fire on his head." This now transfers the responsibility to him. If he does not act according to God's Word, then it is God's place to deal with him. We must trust in the Lord to act on our behalf. He will honour those who are following him.
	It is important to note that you are not to allow a man to harm you, and you are not to follow his leadership if it is contrary to the Word of God. We too have a responsibility for acting on what we know is right and standing up for it, but it should be done in such a way as not to be confrontational or in a way that would usurp the man's authority.
	You might ask about the passages in 1 Timothy 2 which speaks about a woman learning in silence, nor to teach over a man. I have only my opinion on the matter. We don't know what issue Paul was addressing in this church. It is very likely that women were disrupting services with questions, possibly just to cause problems -- there are those women who desire to disrupt things, especially if they don't agree or have a grudge. I think it is pointing to the fact that if something comes up you have a question about, wait and ask it privately. I think when Paul says that a woman is not to teach over a man, this comes back to being in subjection and under a man's leadership, also reinforcing that a woman is not to be a pastor. In 1 Timothy 3 it clearly states that a 'bishop,' or pastor, is to be the husband of one wife. There is no getting around this that the Bible means a man. It does not mean a woman cannot preach. In Mark 16:15 we are all commanded "Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature." I believe, that if a woman is called to preach, she will do it in humbleness, humily, and under the authority of a man. But if this calling causes disruption, then I venture to say it is not of the Lord. When it is His will, things fall into place and meet needs, not cause dissention.
	Next we cover the issue of appearance. Scripture says, "In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works." 1 Timothy 2:9,10. I believe that this passage is stressing, above all else, that a woman should tend to the beauty on the inside before concerning herself with her outer beauty. A woman who is lovely to look upon but has a filthy mouth or immodest behaviour is no beauty, for her actions show what she is on the inside. My husband has told me about a girl he knew in college who was very beautiful, until he got to know her. She would use swear words often in conversation. This may or may not have been her only vice, but it was enough to render her unattractive. I am rather a plain girl. I have never been obsessed with my appearance, but have always taken care of myself. My looks alone did not attract my husband to date me, but it was my personality and character that made me attractive in his eyes. As Christian women we are to care for ourselves and present our best face at all times, but we are not to be preoccupied with the physical. We should look our best, for this reflects on our Lord and our husbands, and we should conduct ourselves in such a way as to bring honour to them. The verse also mentions 'modest apparel.' In today's society it seems that women desire to dress in the least amount of clothing as possible, immodestly pushing the limits of what is acceptable. They feel that they should be free to express their femininity and sexuality -- at least most feminist groups are telling us this. But sisters, I caution you. This is dishonouring to the Lord and unfair to our brothers in Christ. Men are visual creatures, and in dressing in such a manner we are presenting them with temptation, unfair temptation. Yes, the men are responsible for controling their thoughts, but we as women are responsible for being beyond reproach and for not placing a stumbling block before them. They have enough to fight and guard against in the world, we should not add to it. As Christians we should seek to work with our brothers, supporting them and encouraging them.
	We as women hold an awesome responsibility when it comes to the service of our Lord. We, quite possibly, have the most potential influence in the Christian community. Women have long since been known as strong and persistant prayer warriors. As teachers, we can change lives. I think of Jochebed, Moses mother. She only had her son a few years, anywhere from 3 to 6, and yet her teaching stuck with him throughout his life. He stayed true to the Lord, even in the midst of the Egyptian court. He had his failings, but he was greatly used of the Lord. I also think of Hannah. She had Samuel for only a few years before giving him over to the Lord's service. The fact that he was a faithful and dedicated servant greatly used of God has to be attributed to her, seeing how Eli's sons turned out. Even under what might be considered 'restrictions' women can accomplish a great deal for the Lord, and we are only limited by our doubt or resistance. When following in God's plan, we have liberty, fulfillment and virtue. Today's women are missing this, and looking for it in all the wrong places. Hopefully through our examples, we can bring them back.
	The Bible college I attended had a motto; "Be number 2." In our world today the emphasis is on being first, winning, success. It was the goal of this school to instill in its students that 'the greatest among men is the servant of all.' Our Lord demonstrated this, vividly, to His disciples when He washed their feet. If our Saviour could humble Himself to do such a lowly task, can we be any better? But our Lord did not see it as humbling or degrading. We might see being under men, or in submission as humiliating and degrading, but this is because of our flawed human and sinful nature. God created woman's position to be one of honour. In serving, we are patterning ourselves after Christ. This does not mean that as women we are only allowed to have lowly positions in the church or our family. We are to serve in whatever capacity the Holy Spirit leads, as long as it is not contrary to the Word of God or the male leadership you are under. God does not contradict Himself, so the Holy Spirit would not lead you to do something against the written Word of God or His divine plan. Only by having a close personal walk with Him can we know what He would have us to do.
	I hope that through this booklet you have come to see your position as a woman in a new and correct perspective. It is now up to you to go out and be the virtuous woman God wants you to be. Serve with joy, and strive to be Number 2.


	The Virtuous Woman

	Let's look at the Virtuous Woman described in Proverbs 31.
	Monday: read Proverbs 31:1-9. Typically this part is overlooked when dealing with the Virtuous Woman, but it was placed in this chapter for a purpose. What does the first verse say? "the prophecy that his mother taught him." This chapter is what King Lemuel's mother told him. She, being a woman, was very familiar with the power and wiles of women. She knew that a woman's character meant everything to the husband's testimony. In a separate notebook, or your Spiritual Journal, write down the answers to the following questions.
	1. What is the first thing his mother warns him about? v.3
	2. What are kings and princes not to indulge in? v.4
	3. Why does she warn him against this? v.5
	4. What is Lemuel to do? v.9
	5. What advice you would add if speaking to your own son?

	Tuesday: read Proverbs 31:10-15. I believe that the mother, having warned her son against evils, now presents him with guidelines for choosing a woman who will not lead him astray, but help buckle him agains these vices.
	1. What is a virtuous woman worth? v.10
	2. What does this mean to her husband? v.11
	3. What does she do for her husbnad? v.12
	4. What does she do for work? v.13,14
	5. How does she care for her household? v.15

	Wednesday: read Proverbs 31:16-20. This woman is not idle, and serves in many different capacities.
	1. What does she do? v.16
	2. What is characteristic of her? v.17
	3. What kind of a shopper is she? v.18
	4. What does she do at home? v.19
	5. How does she view the less fortunate? v.20

	Thursday, Proverbs 31:21-25. This woman has a great deal of responsibility, servants, children and her husband depend on her.
	1. Why is she not afraid for her household? v.21
	2. What is her clothing like? v.22
	3. What is her husband's reputation like? v.23
	4. What else is she doing? v.24
	5. What else is she clothed in? v.25

	Friday, Proverbs 31:26-31. Her reputation affects her house, and ultimately her worth.
	1. How does she speak? v.26
	2. What characterizes her? v.27
	3. What does her family say about her? v.28
	4. What is favourable? v.30
	5. What is her reward? v.31

	Saturday, Thought Questions. Let's look deeper into some of her characteristics.
	1. Read verses 13,16,19 and 24. What insight can you glean from these verses about the role of a virtuous woman in her household?
	2. Read verses 15,20,21 and 27. What insight can you glean from these verses about the role of a virtuous woman toward others?
	3. Read verses 11,12 and 26. What insight can you glean from these verses about the character of the virtuous woman?
	4. Read verses 17,22 and 25. What insight can you glean from her appearance?
	5. How can you apply these principles to your own life?

	Sunday, Personal Application. When we hear of the Virtuous Woman and Proverbs 31, inwardly we groan. There is no way we can live up to all this. She was perfect. Or can we? We need to take the Virtuous Woman as a pattern for our life, a goal, and strive toward it each day. At first, pick one attribute and work on it until it is incorporated into your life. This side of heaven, we will not reach the model, but we are to be constantly
	striving for it. We only fail, or fall short, when we give up.
	The first characteristic we see in verses 11,12,15 and 20. She puts others first. She considers others needs. Undoubtedly she had the characteristics we studied in this booklet, which allowed her husband to trust in her. Because she puts him first, she has only his good in mind. The second characteristic is in verses 13,19,21,22 and 24. In order to help with the family income, she does her own sewing and also sells some of her handiwork. In verse 16 she has a good business sense and plants a vineyard which will provide for her family, both in produce and extra income. Maybe you can't sew, and you can't garden. What are your talents or gifts? Let the Holy Spirit guide you to putting them to good use that will benefit you, your family and most of all, the Lord. In verse 18 it says that she perceiveth her merchandise. She is alert to what she is buying, being thrifty and making sure it is of good quality. She also keeps track of what is needed and doesn't end up short of supplies. Verse 26 tells us about her speech. She speaks with wisdom and kindness. From this we can gather that she carefully considers what she is going to say before she says it, and most likely even if she has to say something in the way of correction or rebuke does it in such a way as not to be offensive. Or at least does her best. Some people will be offeneded no matter how gently and lovingly you try to correct or instruct them. Verses 25 and 31 are probably the two most powerful in this chapter. The first speaks of her being clothed in strength. I take this to refer to strength of character, and honour because of her virtue. It is obvious to everyone. They can see her fruit, and her works praise her in the gate. If you are truly a virtuous woman, you won't have to tell anyone. They will see it. Even if they don't acknowledge it, God knows and will reward you for it.
In your notebook or Spiritual Journal, write down what it is about yourself you want to change, or what you want to implement in your life. Then jot down ideas on how to bring these changes about. Write a prayer to God asking for His strength, grace and help. You cannot do it in your own power. Next, write down your talents and gifts, then brainstorm about how these can be used for the glory of God. Rely on His leading.

Queen Esther
"For if thou altogether holdest thy peace at this time, then shall there
enlargement and deliverance arise to the Jews from another place; but thou and thy father's house shall be destroyed: and who knoweth whether thou art come to the kingdom for such a time as this?" Esther 4:14

Lois & Eunice
"When I call to remembrance the unfeigned faith that is in thee, which dwelt first in thy grandmother Lois, and thy mother, Eunice; and I am
persuaded that in thee also." 2 Timothy 1:5

Phebe
"I commend unto you Phebe our sister, which is a servant of the church which is at Cenchrea: That ye receive her in the Lord, as becometh saints, and that ye assist her in whatsoever business she hath need of you: for she hath been a succourer of many, and of myself also."
Romans 16:1,2

Mary Magdalene
"Mary Magdalene came and told the disciples that she had seen the Lord, and that he had spoken these things unto her." John 20:18

Jesus
"So after he had washed their feet, and had taken his garments, and was set down again, he said unto them, "Know ye what I have done to you? Ye call me Master and Lord: and ye say well; for so I am. If I then, your Lord and Master, have washed your feet; ye also ought to wash one another's feet. For I have given you an example, that ye should do as I have done to you. Verily, verily, I say unto you, The servant is not greater than his lord; neither is he that is sent greater than he that sent him. If ye know these things, happy are ye if ye do them." John 13:12-17



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