(1) - if he uses his lightsaber to cut the bottlecap off a beer

(2) - if he says "these are not the beers you're looking for"

(3) - if that "Disturbance in the Force" was just last night's baked beans and spare ribs

(4) - if the inside of the house looks more like Dagobah than the outside

(5) - if he calls his young apprentice, "Juner.(JR.)"

(6) - if he ever uses telekinesis to pull his jeans up

(7) - if the Force isn't the only thing that runs in the family

(8) - if he calls Hank Williams Jr."master"

(9) - if his landspeeder has a gun rack

(10) - if he meditiates to old CCR records

(11) - if he calls Yoda his Li'l green buddy.

(12) - if he has ever said, "Anger... fear...aggression... Yankees... the dark side are they."

(13) - if his X-Wing has a still in it

(14) - if his lightsaber has a beer can crusher in the base

(15) - if there is more oil in his robes than in his astromech droid

(16) - if his robes have the Golden Flour label on them

(17) - if he trim his beard and finds a Mynock

(18) - if he has ever used a lightsaber to light the barbecue grill

(19) - if he uses Jawas for a drink holder

(20) - if he fights with a lightsaber in one hand and a spit cup in the other

(21) - if he uses a Jedi mind trick to stop the beer truck

(22) - if he uses his Jedi healing powers to clear up his VD

(23) - if he thinks the best use of your light saber is picking his teeth

(24) - if he ever lost a hand during a light-saber fight because he had to spit.

(25) - if his Jedi robe is Camouflage colored

(26) - if at least one wing of his X-Wing is primer colored

(27) - if he can easily describe the taste of an Ewok

(28) - if he can find no grammatical errors in the way Yoda talks

(29) - if he think that Stormtroopers are just KKK members with really good sheets

(30) - if he has ever used the force in conjunction with fishing/bowling

(31) - if his father ever said to him, "Shoot, son, come on over t' the dark side...it'll be a hoot."

(32) - if he's ever had his R-2 unit use its arc welding torch to get the barbecue grill to light

(33) - if he jump-starts his lightsaber off a car battery

(34) - if he beat the Gamorrean Guard in an "Ugly" contest

(35) - if his father's name is Garth Vader

(36) - if he got his lightsaber by sending in 750 Skoal Lids

(37) - if he’s ever beaten up Han Solo for lookin at his sister

(38) - if he constantly mistakes R2 units for beer kegs

(39) - if he counts B. O. as a Jedi power

(40) - if he's ever used a light saber to skin a deer