BONDAGE: nice

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Yes, bondage is a puzzlement!

This page and the pages to follow are my guide for bondage. They are about the scariest part of bondage...

Finding
out
about
yourself!

How in the world can getting tied up be fun? More to the point, how is it possible for it to be this much fun?

This is about bondage.

Ok, both groups together again.

Those who didn't realize that men treat us good when we are tied up and don't want to hurt us are feeling much better now. We got tied up a little and i talked about a couple of bondage experiences that i've had. Click here if you want to see what you missed or if you want to review.
Now we are all on a level playing field and the next topic is how to expect men to treat you when you are tied up.

Bondage means getting tied up! What happens then?
Maybe another little Show-and-Tell would work here - again. The other group already did this so to be fair, i guess, we have to do it here too. Do you have one of those hair schrunchies with you? A rubber band will do. We are going to do some bondage right now. If he's reading this with you then ask him to please sit with you for this exercise.
Maybe you feel that it would make you nervious if he stays. Either way is alright, but we are gonna talk about limits so it would be good if both partners stayed together. There's not going to be any sex or exposed bodies. Are you ready?
Take the rubber band or whatever you found and slip your wrists inside of it. Those of you in the other class help the one's who haven't done this yet, please. Do not let your partner help you, he can show you how, but that's all. If it's too loose then twist your wrists to tighten it up a little. Don't get it so tight that it snaps and hits you on the nose or something. Stop here and do this before reading on.

Short interlude of music...

Tied up? Ok, good. The perverbial "captive audiance"!

	i told the other class that this is being written as the site crosses the quarter million mark. If i get another quarter of a million visitors and half are women and they come to this page does that mean i'll be reasponsable for over 100,000 women being tied up? We need a tote board... How are we doing so far? - No touching! Probably a rush of sensations, right? No sweat. We are just going to talk and maybe have a demonstration. Please do not remove whatever you used to wrap around your wrists, but if you have to then you have to. You are just experimenting... Lemme get my hands tied too, before someone complains.
	Everyone happy? Now how do the guys feel?.... i know how i feel! If you are alone read this to yourself or better yet go get your lover and share it with him. This question is for the guys: "You are at her home with her. Both of you have drank a little wine, enough to loosen the inhibitions while not getting tipsy. You have snugled on the couch and it's a good time for bed. You've been romantic, but you've not made any big moves on her. You're not sure if you are up to a night of love making or even if she's in the mood. "She goes to the bedroom to put on something more comfortable... When she returns she is wearing an outfit that looks great on her and you notice that she has her hands tied in front of her, like now... "She stands in front of you and giggles nerviously. You feel a stirring and search for words to express how you feel, but before you can get any words out she gets on her knees in front of you and reachs out to hold your hand with both of hers. Your eyes find hers..." Describe to her what you would think and what you would want to happen next. Discuss this between yourselves.
	Ok now it's the girl's turn again. Did he say anything about hurting you? Did he say he would throw rotten fruit at you? i didn't think so... For those of you reading this alone did you imagine anything negative that he'd say? Really? Proof positive that they have no intentions of harming you, right? Still a non-believer? Opps, i see a pair of hands raised in the back of the room... "They could just be saying what you want to hear!" (Who is that back there?)
	Do i really need to go back over the "If you are dating him you are already giving him something just as valuable as your life, you are giving him your heart"? No, i mean he could do more than just make sweet love, y'know? You mean that sometimes he gets a bit wild and if you were tied up then he might get carried away and do more than you are willing to let him do. Aha! This is called negotiation. i've mentioned that before, but let me hit some high points on it. Negotiation is where you tell him what you are offering and what you are not offering AND he can do the same for you, let you know what he wants and hopes for. What you want and what he wants isn't going to be the same - it'd be too boring if it was! Once you get both your points out in the open then you both do a little give-and-take. There may be some things that are not up for debate and that's fine. Don't promise to do more than you are comfortable with - and don't demand that he does either! It's going to boil down to a compromise. Keep in mind the bondage credo: Keep it Safe Sane and Consensual!
	Bondage really is " Safe Sane and consensual"! In case you don't know it, as the bottom (the one being tied) you have two guarantees that it will come out something like you want it to and that he won't break his word... You won't do it again if he goes overboard. Kinda obvious and i've hit on this already. He should know this already, but if it'll make you feel better then tell him he'd better be cool. He wouldn't be a good top. He would suffer the same pangs of self-doubt that you would if you thought you weren't a good lover OR a good person! You want to be a good person, right? A good wife too? A woman? A lady? You know that you can't be any of those things without being true to your word. i think guys know this as well. How do you think a guy would feel if he thought he abused a woman who was all tied up? When you trust him enough to get tied up for him isn't he going to respect that? Half the time the problem is getting a guy to loosen up a bit and have at it! For the ones who get too wild all you need do is tell them that what he is doing is too much. Bondage will force you to be honest! The problem may not be that you don't trust him - you may not trust yourself! And why not? Be as wild and as free as you want to be! i have found myself terribly restrained before and it nothing at all to do with bondage! If anything, i like the fact that in bondage, at least, i can see my restraints - and fight back against them!
	Bondage as an escape: Have you ever just wanted to be alone and by yourself - just for a bit? Bondage isn't always sex. Sometimes it's just being tied up and left alone - to think, to regenerate, to relax. Bondage isn't a crutch though. Crutches have a tendancy to make you weak. i am not a weak person, take my word on this. i have two jobs, go to school, run this site, keep my man happy, and have time to be tied up. Follow in my footsteps for a day and i'll probably wear you out! Do not try to use bondage as a crutch!
	Ok, there's the bell, class dissmissed! Ok, everybody get untied! Smoke a cigarette if that's what you do and straighten up a bit. We've had some fun talking (and doing) and maybe we have shared a bit. Talk to your partner, negotiate, keep it Safe Sane and Consensual, and enjoy life. Wasted time is non-refundable! Bondage. If i could bottle it and sell it i'd be a rich slave! Click here for next in this series! Remember, we have a test next class! Study with a partner! Practice!

Bondage 'tis a puzzlement!
i know!

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