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12 June 2000

Hello my girlfriend just experimented with her bisexuality and told me after going out with her for almost 2 years. She tells me she loves me but will still see other women. I am a male, can she love me and still see other women, she says that the feels nothing for the other women and it's just to experimente with. I love her very much and am afraid I will lose her, can she love me and be bisexual at the same time? I would appreciate your thoughts.

Totally lost....tuff
 
 

Tuff,

I am at a loss as to what to say here. I can understand your situation and can relate to it. You asked me if your girlfriend can love you and still be attracted to other women. She can and I am sure she probably does. I know I have been in love with a man, and my attraction and need for other women was still present. I loved him very much.

However your problem seems to be that not only does she feel this attraction, but that she didn't share it with you until you were in a long-standing relationship. She wants to stay with you, but wants to have the freedom to continue to see and sleep with other women. She expects this freedom without allowing you the same. Can you live with that?

Can you allow her to keep seeing other women and be happy? Can you control your jealousy and insecurities? Would it make a difference if it were other men? Do you really love her? And does she really love you? These are questions that you can only answer for yourself. I wish you both the best and wish I could help more.

Always,
Angel

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