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El Eskeleto Fed Up With Satan; By Super Calo Hell was turned upside down to learn that famed member of Los Ninos del Infierno El Skeleto departed from the ranks of darkness to embrace a new religion. Citing Hell's oppressive beauracracy, El Eskeleto was not shy about expressing his disdain at the political debacle Hell has become. "It's not just the beauracracy," continued El Eskeleto. "Satan's just lost it. He's not the same devil I met in college. It used to be about the Apocalypse but now all he cares about are the chicks and the drugs." The Apocalypse is something El Eskeleto holds dear in his heart. "Without the Apocalypse," said Eskeleto, "I am nothing." His decision cemented about leaving the ranks of the damned, El Eskeleto embarked on a journey to find a new spiritual path. What he found in the endeavor was the ancient Hopi religion and prophecies. The Hopi, famous their kooky Native American beliefs, struck a chord of comraderie in the spiritually confused El Eskeleto. "The Hopi and I have a lot in common," explained El Eskeleto. "Unlike the other so-called faiths, the Hopi don't discuss the Apocalypse with vague terminology and propaganda. They attack the issue with precision and believe that the time is nigh for the destruction of Earth." When asked about the implications of his decision upon his EIW career, El Eskeleto remarked, "I look forward to continue utilizing the EIW platform to embark on my mission of unleashing apocalyptic fury on the unsuspecting citizens of this planet." |
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