The Dukes Of FF7
Part 2: of The Dukes of Hazzard Fan Club.
After the defeat of the Orcs Lord Lothar-- I mean after Cid and his fan clube members built the Dark Portal to Hazzard County Cid told Squal to venture in.
Squal: Why me?!
Cid: You put in the last part, you test it.
Squal fine! [He walks in and gets vaporized,]
Cid: Let's try another one!!
After building another Dakr Portal To Hazzard County they all walked inand emerged in a strange place.
Ricky: Lucy!!
Cid: Oops! Wrong show! [He enters the portal again,]
Pikachu: Pikachu!
Cid: Get the *$_$^ away from me!! [Enters the portal again,]
[Another wierd place,]
Cid: Thishad better be the place!!
Bo: Look out Luke!! We're gonna nail that guy!!
Cid: THE Dukes of Hazzard! [Pulls out a book that says Autograph on the front and takes Squals pen,]
Bo: Luke!! Stop this thing!! [They halt inches away from Cid and Cid's face has no change,] What do you want?
Cid: One of them spoke to me. Oh! [He faints,]
Luke: Let's take him to the house!! [They all pile up in the General Lee and go toThe Duke Residence,]
[The Guest room,]
Cid: I'm in the Duke house. I am the luckiest man on earth.
Bo: Who are you?!
Cid: They're speaking to ME! I am gonna faint again! [Faints again,]
[8 hours of 8 faintings later,]
Cid: I am Cid Highwind. And your THE Dukes Of Hazzard?
Luke: Yes.
Cid: I'm gonna--
Bo: Faint?
Cid: Exactly. [Faints as usual,]
Luke: Bo, know of any good mechanics that'll work on the General for free? [Cid hops up and runs to the General,] Huh?
Bo: Where's he going?
[Outside,]
Cid: Kefka hand me that wrench.
Kefka: I do all the work!!
Cid: FINE! Sephiroth, hand me a wrench.
Sephiroth: Righty-o! [Gives Cid a wrench,]
Cid: Thanks! [Does machanic stuff,]
Bo: What the...?
Cid: You're just in time! Hand me some tools!
Luke: You're fixing the General?
Cid: Yup! What's wrong with it usualy? Wait found it! You're spark plug is a little loose! Fixed!
Luke: How do thank you?
Cid: Autographs and pictures!
Bo & Luke: ?!
Cid: And some time to make this thing faster.
Bo and Luke: FASTER?!
Cid: Yeah! I'll make this do atleast 400 by the end of the week!
Bo and Luke: 400?! Are you serious?!
Cid: Yep. Just let me and my friends get the right tools and we'll have this thing so fast you'll luanch into space.
Bo and Luke: Okay.
[Day 1,]
Kefka: What?! Get the tools?! Do I look like a slave?!
Cid: Just do it and the Dukes might let us all ride in the General Lee itself!
Kefka: I am your slave!! [Runs off to get the tools,] Edgar!! Give that damn drill!! The Chainsaw!! And your Gil!!! Thanks! [Runs back to Cid,] Here!
Cid: Thanks! [Does some drilling,] What's this?!
Aquired Yuffie Revive Materia.
Cid: Wow! Vincent will be cleared!! Wait!! Revive Yuffie?! [Jams the materia back into the General Lee,] Now Yuffie can't be revived! [Does some more work,] Damn!
Sephiroth: What?!
Cid: I need some bolts and a fire materia to weld some things together..
Sephiroth: Anything for the Dukes! [Runs off,]
Kefka: How can I help more?!
Cid: Uh... Go get us some doughnuts!
Kefka: Okay! [Runs into town,]
Cid: Aha! Here's another problem! Something's blocking the gas flow!! EW!! An animal head!!
Aquired rare item "Daisy, the Bunny From Doom's, head"
Cid: So that's where that went. Another problem! Somethings blocking the oil flow... It's a Malibu Stacy!
Aquired another rare item "Maibu Stacy Remains!"
Cid: What, don't they take care of this thing?! Another gasflow blockege?! DAMN!
Aquired "Encyclopedia Britanica."
Cid: Holy Crap!
[Day 7,]
Cid: Done! Try it out!
Bo: Thanks! Hop in for a ride!
Luke: To say thanks!
Dukes Fanclub: YAY! [They all hop in,]
Bo: Thanks, Cid! This thing hasn't ever run better! {rattle is heard,]
Kefka: I'll look! [Get's out and opens hood,] Found the problem!!
Kefka aquired item "Yuffie Revive materia!"
Kefka: You don't see one of these if Final Fantasy 3!!!

Rest To Be Continued in... Final Fantasy 7 Meets The Dukes Of Hazzard!!

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

More fics with Cid+the Dukes!