Everything's big in Texas

One day a farmer in Louisiana was counting his money. He had done

pretty well with the cotton crop that fall, so he decided to go to

Texas and celebrate. He got off the bus in Fort Worth, and asked,

"Where's a good place to eat?"

A man said, "Right down the road is a men's club."

The farmer didn't realize they had a swimming pool, a work-out room,

indoor squash, and racquetball. He just walked to the restaurant door

and said to the waitress, "Lady, bring me a steak and a beer."

The waitress brought out a mug that was 12 inches in diameter and 1

1/2 feet tall. The farmer said, "I just wanted a beer, not the whole

brewery!"

She said, "Mister, this is Texas and everything's bigger in Texas."

Soon she came back with his steak, and it hung over all sides of a

huge sizzling platter. He said, "Lady, I just wanted a steak, not the

whole cow!"

She said, "Mister, this is Texas, and everything's bigger in Texas."

He finally finished his meal and asked the waitress, "Which way to the

restroom?"

She said, "It's down the hall, third door on the right."

The farmer absentmindedly turned into the third door on the left and,

with one step, fell into the swimming pool.

"Help! Help!" he screamed. "Don't flush it!"