Time for your five year old to get dressed for school. You bring him his clothes. He throws them on the floor. You pick them up and ask him to please get dressed. He says he's not going to school--ever again. "All the kids hate me." You patiently explain that that isn't true (you've seen him playing with these kids in the school yard) and once again ask him to get dressed. He doesn't. Finally, he says, "You dress me," and, knowing that there's no other way to win this battle, you do. You manage to get his shirt on. He looks at the pants and proclaims, "I hate jeans." Somehow, you manage to get those on, too (though your son is now lying on is back like an infant with his legs in the air). Now the socks. This is trickier. He won't keep his feet still. For the third time, you ask him to hold out his foot and he accidentally kicks you in the chin. Once the sock battle is over, you put on his shoes. Finally it's done! But no, the socks don't "feel right". You need to take off his shoes and fix them. Eventually, he is dressed and ready.
You take him to school. He decides he doesn't want to go in. You have to pull him out of the car. That's when he takes off. You run after him, catch him, pick him up and carry him in. The whole way, he's screaming, cursing, kicking and trying to bite you. All the other parents are staring. You get him inside and he calms down for a minute. Then his friends come to greet him. "Stop looking at me!" he screams. He refuses to step into the classroom until the teacher moves the other children away from the door.
The teacher calls and asks you to come quickly. She is obviously upset. The first thing you see when you get there is a pile of school bags on the floor. You walk inside and see that things have been torn off the walls and are strewn around the classroom. And a holiday display lies broken on the floor. You go out to the schoolyard and find your son sitting on top of a barrel through which children crawl in order to go down the slide. He looks like he's about to fall (and break an arm or a leg for sure). You manage to get him down safely, but as soon as his feet touch the ground, he takes off. It takes both you and the teacher to catch and restrain him. You manage to grab his hand and take him to a quiet place. You ask him what happened. He tells you he got angry. You ask why, but he doesn't remember.
It's lunch time. You've made chicken and rice. He decides that he wants a sandwich, but you say no, explaining that you have already prepared lunch and it's on the table. He picks up his glass plate, full of food, and holds it over his head, threatening to throw it. You tell him to put it down and he does, so forcefully that chicken and rice fly everywhere.
Lunch is over (finally!). Your son sits down with his seven year old sister to watch TV. He takes the remote control and turns up the volume. You ask him to turn it down. He ignores you. His sister tries to take the remote control away from him. He starts hitting her with it and the battle escalates into a full-blown fist fight, including cursing. You manage to separate them.
Now he's sitting at the computer (the one place he's always quiet). His sister decides that she wants to play, too. He won't let her. Another fist fight.
Time to take your daughter to her art class. He doesn't want to go, but you can't leave him at home alone. He screams and cries, but you finally manage to get him outside. However, he refuses to get in the car. In the meantime, his sister gets in. Then he starts screaming and crying that she has to get out because he doesn't want to climb over her. She's fed up and refuses. You tell him to just get in and he does, purposely pushing his sister, who gets upset and pushes him back. Yet another fight.
While your daughter is at her class, you take your son and his baby brother shopping to buy a few things. He needs some new clothes. You manage to get him to try on one shirt and one pair of pants. That's it. And while you're paying for the clothes that he didn't even try on, he disappears. You run out into the mall looking for him, but he's nowhere to be found. And he's not wearing shoes (you never managed to get them back on his feet after he tried on the pants). You ask the security guard at the department store next door if he's seen a little boy running around in his socks. He says he hasn't. You go into the department store looking for him (you don't know it, but he's actually running around the mall). He sees you from afar and comes in after you (he didn't mean to run away--he was just bored and went looking for something to do). The security guard detains him at the entrance and waits for you to come back.
You pick up your daughter and decide to take the kids to McDonald's for dinner. Your son, who loves McDonald's, runs right to the play area. You get the food and bring it to the table. He eats his French fries and takes off. The hamburger remains untouched. You manage to get him back to the table and you feed him half of the hamburger (you hold it while he takes bites).
After managing to get him out of the play area (getting his shoes back on was tough--he laid down on the floor and had a temper tantrum because he didn't want to leave), you pile the kids into the car and take them home. It's bath time. He hates taking a bath. You have to pick him up and carry him into the bathroom. Then you have to undress him with your back against the door so that he won't "escape". In the bath, he screams and cries like a baby while you wash his hair. And after the bath, he "can't" put on his pajamas alone. You do it for him (after you catch him--he's running around the house naked).
It's bedtime. You manage to get him into bed, but he suddently remembers that he wants a book and comes back to the living room to get it. Back in bed, he calls you and asks you to bring him a glass of water (he just drank water five minutes before). Then, he starts "reading" out loud, much to the chagrin of his sister, who shares his room. They start to argue. You get them quiet and think they're going to sleep. Ten minutes later, he shows up in the living room again. He forgot to tell you something. Finally, an hour and a half after you first put him to bed, he falls asleep. It's over (for now)!
Obviously, this child is either exceptionally spoiled, emotionally disturbed or mentally retarded, right? Wrong! This same child has learned the letters of two alphabets (he's bilingual) on his own. He has even learned to read several words in both of his languages. He is a computer whiz and could probably teach you a thing or two. He finishes educational computer games meant for eight year olds. At the age of three, he could put together a 25-piece jigsaw puzzle. He recognized numbers before he knew colors. He is also warm and loving and funny.
This is my son, Yohai, and he suffers from Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). All of these events really happened (though not all of them in one day). And none of these events are unusual. We deal with similar occurances every single day.
Read about Ritalin, the most common medication prescribed for ADHD.
Go to the journal, detailing our day to day life with Yohai.
For more information about ADHD, check out these links:
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