HOLLOW MAN R
Starring Kevin Bacon, Josh Brolin, Elisabeth Shue, and William Devane
---IN HONOR OF THE MOVIE'S PLOT, MY REVIEW WILL BE INVISIBLE. JUST HIGHLIGHT THE BELOW AREA WITHIN THE PARENTHESES TO "MAKE IT VISIBLE". BY THE WAY, I PERSONALLY GOT THIS IDEA FROM THE FABULOUS UPCOMINGMOVIES.COM. I HOPE THAT THERE'S NO INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY PLAGERISM, IT JUST SEEMED LIKE A GOOD IDEA.---
(Eric says: * 1/2 (1 1/2)
Obviously, this would be a special effect extravaganza. That left 3 possible outcomes for the movie. Either the story would compliment the fx and the flick would be great, the story would be bad, but the fx would be soo excellent and timely that we would forgive the story's shortcomings, or the story would suck and the effects would be disappointing - not in quality, but in "wow" factor, rendering this the Godzilla of this summer. Well................
Meet Godzilla. A god-awful movie in spirit. Two words kept coming to mind as I sat through it - sleazy and cruel. How sleazy? We have 4 female characters throughout the movie. One is a veterinarian who gets groped in her major scene. Another gets the most screen time while the invisible man watches her urinate. A neighbor gets leered at and then raped. The final character, Shue's research scientist, is continually groped throughout and even has an invisible penis pressed against her mouth. And through it all, most of them seem to keep their blouses mostly unbuttoned, and some decide against bras. The final, yet recurring, bit of sleaze is the regular product placement of Kevin's Bacon Bits. For an invisible man, his penis sure is seen a lot (in various states of "coverage").
How cruel? The opening scene depicts a rat being chewed in half - while alive. Another shows a dog being slammed at a high speed against the side of a steel cage, innards splattering against it. We see gooey, steaming monkey guts. Men are burned, stabbed, drowned, and bludgeoned. Women are raped (this qualifies as cruel and sleazy in my book!), strangled, stabbed, neck-snapped, punched, and kicked.
And if only that were the film's only problems! Deep Blue Sea challenged moviegoers' perceptions of who would be killed in a movie, while HM bows down to them. The token sassy black woman is the first to go. The comic relief and "regular guy" also must die. The second female lead, obviously not as important as the female lead, is meat, too. The femme lead and her heroic boyfriend will, of course, survive no matter how improbable the odds. And the bad guy will keep coming back because everyone is too stupid to actually finish him off. Assume nothing, dolts. Speaking of their lack of intelligence, our veterinarian friend never once questions why, during a risky experimental procedure on a human, she is the only medical doctor present.
Paul Verhoeven's personal touch is certainly present here. The misogynistic aura that surrounded Basic Instinct and Showgirls also encompasses Hollow Man. We get a general sense of his disrespect and childish distrust of "girls". The sickest part of his game is the implication that sometimes the women actually like what their tormentors are doing to them. A scene in Hollow Man has Shue displaying a certain amount of pleasure while being fondled by her crazed ex-boyfriend.
Just some rendom observations to finish this off:
-Joey Slotnik of Craig Kilborn legend is passable as the comic relief.
-the movie mentions "wonderpu--y"
-monkey regeneration is cool
-even great fx cannot save crap
-uhh, the plot is implausable
-Rhona Mitra, the original human to play tomb raiding Lara Croft, is the rape victim
Some of my favorite quotes:
--"I've cracked reversion!"
--"I'm losing resolution!"
--"I lost cohesion again!"
Bottom line: if you like star penises, this is your kind of film! If not, make yourself invisible if anyone asks you to see it with you.)
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