61. Cosby: Same Old Cos? Hardly.
Location: CBS, Mondays at 8 EST. Show Type: Comedy Genre: The Traditional Family SitcomSynopsis: Remember The Cosby Show in the 80’s? Well, now, he’s
older and poorer.Has it spawned imitators?: Has helped inspired 80’s comeback kids Fox,
Danson & DanzaWould NBC deem it "Must See"?: The original helped build the Must See
Empire.Character you won’t see anywhere else: That Doug E. Doug fellow.Apocalyptic Sign: n/a. As long as there are TV’s, Cosby will be on the air.Things only a fan would know: Phylicia Rashad was on the original. (OK, everyone
knows that, but there’s little memorable here.)Strengths: Cosby. Memories.Weaknesses: If you’re expecting the hit from before, you’re in for a
shock.How often I watch: I tried to stomach it. Didn’t make it.Ranking Reasoning: It was rumored Cosby wanted to quit the show when he realized it wouldn’t be as heralded as his 80’s sticom. However, he finally figured out this was the best he could do and has become complacent in his mediocrity. Still good for nostalgia, but not necessarily for entertainment.
62. Home Improvement: The Mighty Have Fallen
Location: ABC, Tuesdays at 8 EST. Also in syndication.Show Type: Comedy Genre: The Traditional Family SitcomSynopsis: Cable Access Handy Man Builds Humorous Situations with Family and
Neighbor.Has it spawned imitators?: Helped every two-bit stand-up comedian to get their
own show.Would NBC deem it "Must See"?: Undoubtedly. Had the show not been
produced by Disney, this might have gone to the Peacock.Character you won’t see anywhere else: The Other half of Wilson’s face.Apocalyptic Sign: May. After that, the series signs off for good.Things only a fan would know: One episode was prepared exclusivly for the
syndication market.Strengths: Brand name. Tim Allen’s star power.Weaknesses: Show’s creativity has long since dried up. All the kids grew up
and left.How often I watch: Used to be a big fan.Ranking Reasoning: Tool Time is slowly ending it’s long run at the top of the heap. But almost everyone agrees that it stayed around for about 3 years too many. Having already blown everything up in the Greater Detroit area, it seems that Tim is looking forward to moving on and blowing some other city up. That wacky Tim!
63. Kids Say the Darndest Things: On South Park maybe!
Location: CBS, Fridays at 8 EST. Show Type: Comedy Genre: Video PlaybackSynopsis: Bill Cosby interviews precocious youngsters. They say funny stuff.Has it spawned imitators?: Helped Candid Camera
make it’s "triumphant" return.Would NBC deem it "Must See"?: Even NBC won’t stoop this low.
Thank goodness for small miracles.Character you won’t see anywhere else: That pudgy 8 year old who thinks
he’s going to marry his sister.Apocalyptic Sign: Someone enforces those child abuse laws.Things only a fan would know: There are fans of this show?Strengths: Gives Bill Cosby something to do.Weaknesses: How many times can we watch kids say wacky stuff?How often I watch: Never.Ranking Reasoning: Would someone please put a stop to this madness? If I see one more kid make some inane remark that makes absolutely no sense, I’m going to take those Jello Pops and stick them in an unpleasant place. And you wonder why this country has bred so many serial killers…
64. America’s Funniest Home Videos: If this is our funniest, we’re in trouble.
Location: ABC, Fridays at 8 EST. Show Type: Comedy Genre: Video PlaybackSynopsis: Send in your tapes. We’ll humiliate you on the air.Has it spawned imitators?: Name a FOX special.Would NBC deem it "Must See"?: See Bloopers & Practical Jokes.Character you won’t see anywhere else: That cute little baby who throws
things at Daddy’s crotchApocalyptic Sign: The Return of Bob Saget.Things only a fan would know: How many non-baby videos have won the Grand Prize. (Clue: It
ain’t many.)Strengths: Daisy Fuentes.Weaknesses: After the first 3 episodes, got old really quick.How often I watch: Like the rest of the US, I watched the 1st year.
Then I grew up.Ranking Reasoning: The time has come for America to stop sending in those tapes. 1. Anything funny that could happen on a video tape has already been shown, twice. 2. The sooner you stop sending tapes, the sooner this show goes away. 3. So Daisy, you seeing anyone?
65. The World’s Funniest: Edges out AMHV for Worst video show on the air today.
Location: FOX, Sundays at 7 EST. Show Type: Comedy Genre: Video PlaybackSynopsis: A Cavalcade of Hilarity, brought to you by James Brown.Has it spawned imitators?: Thankfully, no. You can’t get worse than this.Would NBC deem it "Must See"?: Nah. They’ve got Dateline.Character you won’t see anywhere else: That British newsman who gets bitten
by a monkey.Apocalyptic Sign: They show the audience reaction.Things only a fan would know: If there is a fan, they need to be drug into the
street and shot.Strengths: That enigmatic James Brown. Cost 49 per episode.Weaknesses: Recycled stock footage from the 70’s is somehow funny today?How often I watch: Whenever I tune in early to catch the Simpsons.Ranking Reasoning: Possibly the worst show idea in 30 years (other than that Desmond Pfiffer crap), the Godfather of Souls hosts vignettes from every source imaginable. And the cool part is, they don’t even have to be funny! The only reason it’s still on is FOX feels it’s getting enough bang for it’s buck. (About how much 1 episode costs.)
66. The Nanny: Makes Queens as appealing as The Plague.
Location: CBS, Wedensdays at 8 EST. Also in syndication. Show Type: Comedy Genre: The Traditional Family SitcomSynopsis: Wacky Nanny sits for Wacky Family. What a Wacky concept!Has it spawned imitators?: How can a Mr. Belvedere clone be considered
innovative?Would NBC deem it "Must See"?: A grating female lead? They’d be
all over it.Character you won’t see anywhere else: Fran herself. Thank God.Apocalyptic Sign: The end of the year. After that, it’s cancellation city.Things only a fan would know: Fran appeared in This is Spinal Tap.Strengths: Not on 24 hours a day.Weaknesses: That laugh. Stock characters. Middling scripts.How often I watch: Haven’t had the pleasure.Ranking Reasoning: Thankfully, this waste of celluloid will be gone in May. Until then, Fran and that voice will be in our collective conscience. Heaven help us!
66. Diagnosis Murder: David VanDyke’s latest is DOA.
Location: CBS, Thursdays at 8 EST. Show Type: Drama Genre: Doctors and Medicine, Crime and PunishmentSynopsis: Doctor Dad and Sherriff Son solve crime.Has it spawned imitators?: Nope. Would NBC deem it "Must See"?: Absolutely not!!!Character you won’t see anywhere else: VanDyke’s Son (Probably the only
gig he could get.)Apocalyptic Sign: They don’t get their afternoon nap.Things only a fan would know: What it was like in the 1800’s.Strengths: Caters to the geriatric crowd. VanDyke’s star power.Weaknesses: Not entertaining. Poor writing. Wooden acting.How often I watch: During a Friends repeat when I
lose the remote war.Ranking Reasoning: The biggest sign that CBS doesn't give a rip about people under 50. Only people with Alzheimer's (and the show's stars) can't seen the killer from a mile away.
67. Jesse: Newest Kaufman/Crane comedy not funny yet.
Location: NBC, Thursdays at 8:30 EST. Show Type: Comedy Genre: The Traditional Family SitcomSynopsis: Single Mom tries to make it with the help of her wacky family.Has it spawned imitators?: Nope. Why copy this car wreck? Would NBC deem it "Must See"?: It is Must SeeCharacter you won’t see anywhere else: John Jr. used to have a gimmick: he
didn’t talk. But they gave up on a running gag only 6 shows in. Pathetic.Apocalyptic Sign: Changing time slots.Things only a fan would know: Uh …Strengths: Time slot. "From the Creators of Friends".Weaknesses: The Creators of Friends are obviously not focusing their creative
talents on this trash.How often I watch: If I lose the remote, I’ll watch from the amount of time
it takes to get to the TV once Friends is over.Ranking Reasoning: This show was predicted to be one of the best brand new shows of the year, based on the fact that it was from the Friends team and starred Applegate from Married with Children. However, we merely got a repeat of last year’s debacle Veronica’s Closet. Sure, it’ll be ranked in the Top 5 all year and will be on for at least 2 more years. But let’s face it, this show is awful.
68. Nash Bridges: The San Francisco Treat.
Location: CBS, Fridays at 10 EST. Show Type: Action Genre: Crime and PunishmentSynopsis: Sonny Crocket and Cheech fight crime with that chick from Baywatch.Has it spawned imitators?: Martial Law
follows in this show’s footsteps. Would NBC deem it "Must See"?: They did about 12 years ago.Character you won’t see anywhere else: The cameo by Stone Cold Steve Austin.Apocalyptic Sign: Higher expectations.Things only a fan would know: The difference between any of the episodes.Strengths: Johnson’s and Cheech’s star power.Weaknesses: The acting, plots, storylines, production….How often I watch: Never.Ranking Reasoning: Ranked lower than it’s Night of Heroes counterparts because this show doesn’t even try to be entertaining. They put Don, Cheech, and Yasmine on the screen and expect us to love them. We don’t. At least all the car crashes and fights can distract us from this aomination of a show.
69. 2 of a Kind: Full House II: Judgement Day.
Location: ABC, Fridays at 8 EST. Show Type: Comedy Genre: The Traditional Family SitcomSynopsis: Olsen Twins in all sorts of wacky adventures.Has it spawned imitators?: All those silly direct-to-video movies. Would NBC deem it "Must See"?: Possibly.Character you won’t see anywhere else: Happily, the Olsens.Apocalyptic Sign: Puberty.Things only a fan would know: Why they still watch this after they hit their
teens.Strengths: Leads off TGIF, when the kids haven’t gone to bed yet.Weaknesses: Those no-talent Olsens. Shoddy Production. No plots.How often I watch: Never.Ranking Reasoning: And you thought Full House was dead. ABC, having run out of any creative thought or effort, decided to go bring out this reatread and staff it with America’s least favorite twins. Apparently, the personnel guy over at Disney sees something that the rest of America doesn’t. It’s not just that the plots are lame, the acting unispired, or the production fumbled. This is a show that should have never been thought up to begin with.
70. Encore! Encore!: Who thought the Friends creators could screw this up?
Location: As of this ranking, the show has been put on hiatus. Show Type: Comedy Genre: The Traditional Family SitcomSynopsis: Opera star loses voice and job. Must live with normal people.Has it spawned imitators?: Not a chance. Would NBC deem it "Must See"?: They did for a while.Character you won’t see anywhere else: Nathan Lane as a heterosexual.Apocalyptic Sign: The show comes back.Things only a fan would know: When to laughStrengths: Lane’s star power. Frasier’s
production team.Weaknesses: The show simply wasn’t funny.How often I watch: Never.Ranking Reasoning: Admittedly, Frasier is a little too high brow for some people’s tastes. But this show took the premise in the wrong direction. I would wager money that most of America’s prime-time viewers don’t have the slightest idea about the history of the opera. Nor do they care. You could tell this was a disaster waiting to happen early on in the summer promos. Nathan Lane ordering posh food at a greasy spoon? The formula didn’t work for Fired Up, last year’s abomination. And it certainly doesn’t work here.
71. Suddenly Susan: Must Flee TV.
Location: NBC, Mondays at 8 EST. Show Type: Comedy Genre: Workplace Hi-jinksSynopsis: Loopy woman works at San Francisco newspaper with a bunch of oddballs.Has it spawned imitators?: Paved the way for Veronica’s
Closet. Would NBC deem it "Must See"?: During the first year.Character you won’t see anywhere else: Judd Nelson.Apocalyptic Sign: Kathy Griffen Speaks.Things only a fan would know: Brooke Shields supposedly received physical comedy
instruction before starting this series. It doesn’t show.Strengths: Shields star power. Time slot from 2 seasons ago.Weaknesses: Plot, acting, employing Judd Nelson.How often I watch: I’ve seen half an episode.Ranking Reasoning: Credit this show and The Single Guy for creating the animosity towards NBC’s Thursday Night scheduling practices. The theory goes: spread out your best shows and sandwich them with crap that no one would watch if it aired in any other time slot. And darned if the strategy didn’t work. Enough of America is brain dead enough to watch these shows. We only have ourselves to blame. After 2 ½ years, Shields is still wooden, Griffen is still annoying, and Judd Nelson still scares me.
72. Dateline NBC: Could this be on any more often?
Location: NBC, Sunday-Wednesdy, Friday. Show Type: News Magazine Synopsis: We can’t think of anything to show, so how about some news?Has it spawned imitators?: Among other things, an entire channel (MSNBC). Would NBC deem it "Must See"?: It must so.Character you won’t see anywhere else: Stone Phillip’s head bob.Apocalyptic Sign: n/a. They’ll never run out of stories on Princess Diana
and Jon Benet Ramsey.Things only a fan would know: Which stories aren’t faked.Strengths: Is on more often than a Budweiser commerical.Weaknesses: Made-up stories. The true ones are over-sensationalized.How often I watch: It’s my mom’s favorite show.Ranking Reasoning: I have seen the death of Prime-Time, and it is Dateline. Rather than create new entertainment shows (however awful they might be), NBC has decided to continually clone this show. And when you have to fill at least 5 hours a week, the stories run thin. In steps the Dateline team to sensationlize every crime, over-hype every celebrity interview, and over-dramatize every investigation. And the GM fuel-tank fire fiasco only showed that NBC is willing to manufacture news just to have enough stories to fill the airwaves. If I see one more story on the afore-mentioned Diana, I’m gonna hurl. SHE’S BEEN DEAD FOR TWO YEARS NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
73. Veronica’s Closet: The worst idea since Walter Mondale.
Location: NBC, Thursdays at 9:30 EST. Show Type: Comedy Genre: Workplace Hi-jinksSynopsis: Ditzy woman runs lingere company.Has it spawned imitators?: Gave Ted Danson the idea you could come back. Would NBC deem it "Must See"?: n/a.Character you won’t see anywhere else: Ron SilverApocalyptic Sign: Frasier ends.Things only a fan would know: The number of different owners of Veronica’s
company.Strengths: Time slot.Weaknesses: The entire show.How often I watch: If ER comes on late.
Ranking Reasoning: This show was supposed to be the cream of last year’s crop. It was from the Friends creative team and starred many sitcom veterans. It was nestled between TV’s two biggest hits. It couldn’t miss. And while it brings in the ratings, it is universally hailed as the worst thing on TV. Stale punchlines. Wooden performances. Uninspired stories. Non-sensical plots. There is not one redeeming quality of this show. You have to figure that this show would rank at the bottom of the heap if it were on at any other time. This show’s performance was so bad, it got Warren Littlefield, NBC’s Entertainment head, run out of his position. So, I guess some good came out of it.
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