M-Division quotes.

I am a mechanic. These are the people I most directly work with. My division is part of the reason I am deciding to leave the Navy after 16 years. Sounds pretty stupid, but after reading this, staying in sounds rediculous too.

• "I can't believe how little we get paid. Just for the sheer time of it, the khaki's say we don't do a fucking thing so just for the time of it, we should get paid at least double."
  -MM2
• "My question is who's gonna teach MMC the right way to do PMS? He's the one who taught us ‘OH JUST X THAT OFF'!"
  -MM1
• "All you had to do was ask. That's what everybody else did. Some people begged."
  -MM2
• "Should have kept Sideshow."
  -MM2
• "Somebody went through my poopie suit last night and stole my gerber!"
  -MM2
• "I'm gonna go home and beat up my wife so I can get time off."
  -MM2
• Saturday, Oct 10. "I'm supposed to be in Washington right about now."
  -MM2
• "One hundred and twenty two times."
  -MM2, refering to number of times he masturbated during six month depolyment
• "We did an interview but he had to go play cribbage and he wants to look at my test so I guess we're not finished."
  -MM3
• "You should have seen some of those dishes I washed - really dirty."
  -MM3
• "Put the book away. You don't need procedures."
  -MM3 (to MM3)
• "EM2 came down and he was going to fix the 1SB but Master Chief made him go wax decks."
  -MM3
• "You can tell if a woman is really evil before you marry her."
  -MM3
• "MM3 won't do it cause he's a lazy fuck."
  -MM3
• "We always got good stories. MMC is our LPO for God's sake."
  -MM1
• "I sold the shit out of the Seaman Apprentiship program. I put so many idiots in that program."
  -MM1
• "So ET1, how was watch? Did you get enough rest?"
  -MM1
• "I am not evil."
  -MM1
• "Now let's go see if I can get JB spun up."
  -MM1
• "You guys are so fucked up!"
  -MM1
• "I'll paint. I'll paint. I gotta go shine my shoes that's for damn sure. You gotta rag?"
  -MM1
• "Dude! You can't tell anymore. The young chicks are trying to look older, the old chicks are trying to look younger. I'm just fat."
  -MM2
• "You could get a knobber and fuck the pussy at the same time."
  -MM2
• "The COB is an outstanding individual."
  -MM2
• "Actually, it wouldn't be hard to replace that jacking gear. Just four bolts."
  -MM2
• "Where you been MM3, you slackass nub? You get some this morning? Well, me neither but at least I was on time."
  -MM2
• "You live in a turd. You sleep in a coffin. You shit on steel. And your worried about whipped cream?"
  -MM2
• "I went to mast for having a porno mag in Engine Room Lower Level. He operates a switch with a DANGER TAG and nothing happens. I just don't think they like me."
  -MM2
• "Have you ever seen the movie or read the book 'Of Mice and Men?' I wish I had a friend as good as George. George would have shot me and put me out of my misery."
  -MM2
• "You're like a new toy for us. We never had anyone in shape around here."
  -MM2
• "I think most of his downfall is the fact that he's a fucking retard."
  -MM2
• "That's because you didn't teach me that I wasn't here to learn anything."
  -MM1
• "See - you can't give STS3 shit. You have to let him steal it."
  -MM1
• "A snowball in hell will last longer than my record at he chief selection board."
  -MM1
• "It doesn't matter who he likes or who he doesn't like. He sucks up to everybody."
  -MM1
• "I don't get to sleep through any like I used to."
  -MM1, talking about drills