From: Some e-mail adress I don't want to advertise
To: some other mass e-mail thing
Subject: Please call me

Please help me get off!! Are you a hot man?
If yes, hurry-up and call me because I need
you sooo bad. I'm totally hot and bothered,
I need you. I need you so bad that the
call is on me! That's right, FREE. Call
and let's get off together - Call nowww.
I am waiting......

Niki

Okay. She needs a man. Not only a man, but a hot man, sooo bad. Why? Because she needs to "get off". Clearly "Niki" here's never heard of masturbation. "Niki"'s hot too. Hot AND bothered. Therefore - she needs you. She's even going to pay for you to call her and help her get off while you get off. If I had included the number, you could've helped her out, but heh, I wouldn't want you to call nowww. Let's just...keep her waiting.

Argh. I can't believe I'm actualy up while it's day outside...I spent the weekend flipping the hours around. I went to Marias' on saturday, where we ate yummie veggie burritos (I think), and watched silly movies - Toys [Tori sings a song. JOAN CUSACK. Robin Williams. LL COOL J. It's about TOYS! Instant love =], Plump Fiction [the girl imitating Juliette Lewis gave me the creeps - she was that "good"] and *drumroll* Happy Gilmore!["You're gonna DIE, CLOWN!!"] (and one of the friday 13 movies, dunno what part..does it really matter?), listened to music and TALKED. I walked home at _5.30_ in the morning.

At 5.30 in the morning here it's....dark. Very, very dark. It's also late october, making it cold. Very, very cold. Also, Maria lives across town on a hill...separating 'town' and that hill is a steep hillside road. That road is in a forest. On one side of the road is a tinsy chapel with a graveyard. It's...not a place where you want to be walking at 5:30 a.m when it's really dark and really cold. But I was. Now to keep my scared-of-the-dark-woods self calm I invented a really stupid mantra. Before I entered the woods I decided it might be a good idea to ask the stars to look out for me. And then basicaly I chanted 'I Do Not Cause Harm.' for the 10-15 minute walk, concentrating on not looking into the woods or at the graveyard or anything, until I got out, said 'Thank You' to...nothing, and walked home. IT WAS 5:30, and I AM weird so :P~...I'm alive, aren't I?

Anyhoo. After the 40 min walk I fell into bed and didn't come up again until 6 pm sunday night. Then I remembered it's daylight savings thingy time, so officialy I got up at 5. Heheheh.

Did I mention I got to hear the new Björk album, Homogenic? It is GOOD! I only heard bits of this and that, but I really really liked it...

Happy Belated Birthday Bren! *huuuuuuug* And..HAPPY BIRTHDAY BEN! *huuug*

And now, for some good ole ranting:

I can't wait til friday to see if I will really dress up or not. I dunno WHY I'm so excited about it, but I am. The silly part is, I don't have real goth clothes, so I'll only have goth makeup and regular black clothes...how lame is that? Also, I don't have as much make up as I'd like, so for example, I can't make my eyes all sooty with black eyeshadow, or put it on my cheeks...I'll simply have to settle for thick thick black eyeliner, lots of mascara and..white powder =/. (Oh, so call me narcissistic..or..something..see if I care :P :) I'm just really excited about it. I was wondering though..if I painted a tiny black star on my cheek bone with black nailpolish, would that be bad? Could I..be poisoned or something? *shrug* Questions questions...

You know what I really really can't stand? People that are way into vampires and gothic stuff etc. I am such a hypocrite, I know, because I am, or used to, be really into vampire stuff...but see, what I mean is..all these people that will have names like...Vampirica and Nathyalie and DarkShadowLord etc...it just makes me all blahy...you can find them on webchats titled "Vampire webchat - for REAL vampires only!" and such, and they're all typing things to each other like "Vampyrica laughs, flashing her razor sharp white teeth...what do you think of my new slinky black velvet dress, my lord?". *gag*

DON't get me wrong here. I love reading vampire novels and talking/imagening about it, but it just seems so...lame...I mean...I dunno, I guess I classify it much like net.sex....what's the PoInT? "I'm not really a 17'year old girl in t-shirt with zits, I'm a 370 year old beautiful vampire, and instead of flirting with that 26 year old guy with a bad hair cut I'm flirting with his character, the bloodthirsty Velir." "I'm not really a bored housewife, I'm really Pamela Anderson, and I'm not having net.sex with a bored ingeneer in Florida, I'm having sex with Brad Pitt". Blah. I'm not really making sense am I?

Proof I change appearance all the time - people who have met me irl, and people who have only seen my online pics have compared me with: Ruby Wax. Roseanne. CLAIRE DANES. Bjork (TWICE!?!)...interesting mix, eh?

It's Halloween eve now...
all the children'r trick or treatin'

Okay..so besides my halloween craze, nothing much is going on...I just..annoy as usual over people with stuffed runny noses that REFUUUUUUSE to go blow their nose, but instead spend hours SNOOOOOrting it back up there again 8(

Hmm, what else annoys me...OH...let's make a list, shall we?(well, technicaly, it's me making the list...):

1. People who won't blow their runny noses.
2. People putting gibberish spam in my guestbook.
3. People shaking their head when I try to throw some Halloween spirit towards them.
4. Family members tricking me to come upstairs and help them with something by yelling that I have a phonecall, only to have me get up out of my warm cosy bed, get dressed, run upstairs and find they were lying. Meanies.
5. Girls who dramaticaly change their appearance to match their new boyfriend (dress down etc)
6. Cold wet soggy socks 8(
7. Guys that think shoulderlenght stringy hair with GOO in it looks good.
8. "haha, i'm in a car and you're out walking in the rain" people.
9. Snotty toystore cashier people. (That's for a party..no?Um...oooookay)

ARARARRAGH! Only a few days left!!!

The guys I work with on the Terminator project...argh...don't get me wrong, they're nice guys, doh...but it frustrates me..everytime I try to get us gathered so we can actualy get some WORK done they'll just..wander off...I mean, it's okay sometimes, because at the moment we don't have a lot to do, but it's really annoying, I seem to be the only one that ever says "HELLO? Can we at least try to gather and come up with today's plans??". Not that we ever do..someone's always missing, out smoking or getting coffee or just...somewhere else. Argh. 8(

Have you noticed that I all of a sudden use 8) and 8( a lot? I have no idea why..and no, I don't wear glasses...the 8) looks like it would probably wiggle it's eyebrows though, and the 8( looks like a disappointed alien ...heh..that's me I guess...

I really really like just watching the sky. I don't need anyone beside me to point things out to, I can just get stuck watching it whenever...I just think it's amazing how something can be that beautiful *all* the time...I mean, I don't believe in a specific god, but sometimes when I look up, and there's all these magnificent clouds...slightly peach coloured, with rays of a leaving sun coming up behind them, so that it looks like there are rivers of gold and waterfalls, and it's all so beautiful you don't know if you should laugh or choke on tears...it looks like another world beyond our brains and wars and remote controls.

Argh, I'm a bit nervous actualy..I mean..ahhaha..I'm gunna be really dressed up in public - when no one else is. *grin* Ah well..how intimidating can it be? Besides, I'll look scary, so anyone who doesn't know me won't dare to snicker 8)

Sorry it was so short..but I'll make it up some day...oooooh yes..right now I have to go pee anyways...hehhe...

"I think I'll be bi today, yeah, that'll make me cool!
But we all know i really suck...yes Jessica....I suck....wah...

I got up at 6.45...had to sow together some holes that were in my thin black see through shirt..I got dressed (we're talking a big getup here, as I didn't want to get cold so..underwear, black tight thin pants, bra, black t-shirt, black short spandexy pants pulled up over the t-shirt/chest to keep the other pants from falling down due to bad stretch band 8), black skirt pulled up over my chest, black stretch band belt making the skirt a dress, and the black seethrough shirt over that. Oh...and my Dracula necklace..and my WITCH HAT!)

I then made a halloween tape for my walkman:

• Depeche Mode - Stripped, Master and Servant, Just Can't Get Enough, Black Celebration.

• Sisters of Mercy - Alice

• Polly Harvey and Nick Cave - Henry Lee

• Annie Lennox - Lovesong for a Vampire

• Adam Sandler - Halloween song

• The entire soundtrack for The Lost Boys

• Smiths - How soon is now? and Last night I dreamt that somebody loved me

The scariest part was walking back to town after the day was over...I mean, at 8 in the morning, there's not a lot of people out, but around NOON a friday..yikes..it was okay though..people STARED a lot...it was fun watching people in cars heads' turn swoosh after me...several pointed, most of them smiled/laughed so...I didn't mind. Mym mom did though 8( I went to her job to get some money for some booth photo's (will be scanned and up monday), and she FREAKED..everyone there but her thought it cute..blah. Now my last 'worry' is that I'll stumble upon my brother, but I know he's leaving today so..I'll try and keep in hiding...I dunno..I couldn't care less what anyone else thinks, but I just don't like it when he comments on things I do, because he's always really mean and has no sense of humour about things that COULD MAKE HIM look bad. Blah.

Today a woman called Magela at Datorteket informed us about our towns center for battered/abused women, and it was really inspiring..I mean, I sadly enough know from personal experience how important it is for places like this to exist, and it's unfortunate that they don't have the kind of recourses they deserve moneywise..in fact, I got so interested I asked Magela if there was any way I could help out, so now I'm getting to attend their staff meeting on monday...If nothing else, I'll have shown interest.

Oh great. There's now a 3 year old boy that believes I'm a real witch. His aunt was joking with him and said I was, and he didn't believe me when I said I was a nice witch, and kept telling me that he wasn't a bad boy, that he was a very good boy, yes, and no he didn't want to try on my hat....*laugh* Gawd.......