That was very much my case. I had been doing a lot of things during my summer. I'd gone shopping with Leigh and Kate. I'd gone to concerts -- lots of them in the three weeks I'd been on tour. Seen videos of the guys and just relax. And my favorite one: read to my heart's contend.

However, there was one thing I was missing the most ought to my cast: swimming.

Summers prior to this one, I would spend three quarters of the day in the pool. I would have breakfast, get in the pool and swim a little bit. Get out just for lunch, read what I found in my way, and get back into the pool a couple of hours before dinner. It was heaven.

But you can't do such a thing with a cast in your hand. So I haven't touched water -- in the pool kind of way -- for the past two weeks. And I was really starting to show.

I stretched my arms, trying to reach for the ceiling as my articulations popped up. My back was starting to hurt and I had barely been sitting for half an hour. I sighed softly.

Kevin turned around, his eyebrows frowning. "You alright?"

I nodded. "Yeah, my back is hurting a little. That's all."

"What are we doing the rest of the day?" Howie asked, taking a small bite of his chicken.

I didn't say anything, waiting for the guys to talk. They didn't have a concert tonight, which was rare but always fun. As far as I knew, they hadn't planned anything.

Brian shrugged. "Dunno. What ya wanna do?"

"Clubbin'!" Alex said, oh so very enthusiastically.

Kevin shook his head. "Radio show tomorrow morning."

"Damn," he muttered under his breath.

I would have thought Alex would complain, but then I realized that they knew perfectly fine that the only way to be up without any trouble tomorrow morning was to hit the sack early. And they were right. Usually, for their radio shows, they'd have to be up by five thirty. That was very early indeed.

"It's been ages since we last went bowling," Nick suggested, a grin on his lips.

"Bowling, did you say?" Kate asked, her eyes sparkling. I only smiled with her.

"You like bowling?"

"Do I like it?" Kate answered Howie's question with one of her own. "I love it! And so does Matt!"

"I didn't know that," Kevin said, turning around to look at me.

I only shrugged. "Gotta keep some secrets, don't you think?"

"Bowling sound good," Brian agreed, finishing his lunch.

"Yeah, bowling!" AJ cheered, standing up and lifting his hand. "Yeah, baby."

"I take Alex likes bowling," I whispered to Kevin's ear, a smile on my lips. Kevin turned around, placing a small kiss on my cheek.

"Yeah, he loves it. He's very competitive about it too."

I only smiled.

"I guess it's bowling, then," Howie grinned at AJ's antics as well.

"I'll check out the places. What ya say seven?"

The guys nodded and I grinned. Kate grinned with me. It'd be fun.

*****

We entered the place and I couldn't help but smile. Kate grabbed my good hand, squeezing it slightly. I turned around and she was grinning as much as I was.

"This is great," she said a little loud and I just chuckled.

The place was amazing. The lights were dim all around the room, filled only with colorful lights going from green to purple, giving it a very cool atmosphere. The walls on the back of the lines were painted in bright colors, with aliens and spaceships and that only made it greater for me.

"This is a very cool place," Howie said, walking over to the tables.

Nick nodded. "How did you find it?"

Kevin only lifted his eyebrows and smiled. "I asked around."

I turned around, giving him a small smile. I wanted to kiss him. The place was really great. Before I could say anything, I heard a scream and felt like groaning.

The guys had been recognized. I tried to convince myself that wouldn't change the afternoon, considering the bodyguards had come with us; I hope it wouldn't.

The guys didn't pay any attention to it. I had heard Nick said that this was their night and they wouldn't be bothered by the fans. I was wondering if the fans would feel the same way.

We went to get our bowling shoes. Everyone asked between ten and half to eleven and a half. I asked for an eight rather lowly. Kate only smiled at me as she asked for a four. The guys didn't hear us. That was good.

After that, we walked over to a table, Kevin guiding us. I was sure he had asked in advance, probably even talked with security and they had given us a table.

"Eighteen and nineteen. This is us."

The guys sat on the tables while Kate and I looked around us, trying to find the perfect balls.

"Where you going?" I heard Nick shout. I waved him off.

"Found one," Kate said, lifting her beloved 9 ball in the air. I nodded. I was looking for a 11 and a 12. It took me a minute, but I finally found them. I would have loved to take both in hands, but I couldn't manage. Barely one hand was functioning at the moment.

A second later I found Nick by my side, smiling. "Which one?"

I jerked my heard towards the 11 one, since I had the 12 in hand, and looked at him funny.

When Nick realized my confusion, he chuckled. "Kate send me here. She said you'd have trouble with the balls." I nodded at him. "You shouldn't have bothered though, we could have send Eric if you needed anything."

I shook my head, walking over to the table. "No need when I can do it."

Nick shrugged.

We got back to the table and there was a guy taking the guys' orders. That was funny. Usually when Kate and I went bowling, it'd take us at least twenty minutes to get someone to take our orders. Guess that's fame, right?

"You guys want anything?" Kevin asked, looking my way.

"Two cokes and French fries," Kate said, smiling.

"We've ordered French fries already. Just two cokes."

The guy, whose name was Peter, nodded and went off. Not even a second later, another guy was standing by the table. This one was no waiter, I could tell you that. He was in a suit and something told me he was the manager.

The guy tilted his head, "Mr. Richardson?"

Kevin turned around, nodding at him. "Yeah?"

"My name is Daniel Stuart. I talked with you over the phone."

Kevin nodded once again. "Yeah. Daniel, thanks."

Daniel smiled slightly and I could tell he was nervous. "If there's anything you need, please, don't fear to ask. Is everything alright so far?"

Kevin smiled at the man. "Yeah. Everything it's great. Thanks."

"Your welcome," with that, he was gone.

Kate lifted her eyebrow, looking at me. "What was that?"

"I think that's Backstreet style," I said, meaning the quick attention, the security and the manager.

Kate agreed with me. "Guess so."

We didn't give it much thought, as we looked at the lines before us and just sighed. It had been almost a month and a half since the last time we went bowling. Since Kate's birthday, we hadn't had a good night out, finals being so close after it. And so, having the time to bowl and the friends to do it with was a great kick for us.

I turned around, a huge grin on my lips. "Lets get started then."

She grinned back. "My thoughts exactly."

"Well," Howie said, looking at us. His words brought us back from our own reverie. "This is the way we're going."

We both lifted our eyes, staring at the screens above the lines.

On the line we were in, were Kate, Howie, Brian and I. In that particular order. The other table had Nick, Alex and Kevin. It would be fun to see how the guys could bowl.

"Why like this?" Kate, always the inquisitive one.

Nick grinned a rather devious grin I had only seen before on Kate's lips. "More fun. It's pretty much every man on his own here, but we can do teams, if you want."

Kate grinned madly, her eyes twinkling as she shook her head. "No way. I wanna kick your butt all by myself."

"In your dreams."

She hissed and I wanted to chuckle. "You wish."

Nick only glared.

Two guys came by, taking me by surprise. They left the orders, a couple of beers around, our cokes and three batches of French fries. The guys barely did turn around, Kevin seemed to be the only one who realized the guys had come, thanking them.

"Why don't we make it more interesting?" Alex said, leaning against his chair, lighting a cigarette. The scene seemed out of a picture, but I didn't comment.

I tilted my head. "What do you mean by that?"

Kevin shook his head, rather sternly for the situation. "No Alex. No betting."

"Why not? That gives the game more pressure and that makes it interesting."

"We should bet." I said, shrugging when Kevin looked at me funny. "I can handle a bet."

"You're injured."

"What does that has to do with anything?" I asked Kevin. I only wanted to play at the moment, but if he was to get on my nerves, he was really going to find me this time.

But Kevin was smart this time. He only sighed softly. "If you all want..."

The guys nodded, even Kate agreed. I knew she would. She always gets like that when it's bowling.

"Then, sure," Kevin said after a moment. "Not much."

Alex nodded. "Twenty bucks per point."

I heard Howie groaning and Brian only shrugged, with a rather resigned face.

"Don't you think that's a little bit too much?" Nicky asked.

Alex shrugged and Kate nodded. "That's fine by me."

Alex raised his eyebrows, taking a puff of his ciggie. "You put money along with your words."

I saw something glimmering in Kate's eyes. "If you'll pay up."

"Oh, feisty!" Alex said, making a clicking sound with his mouth. Kate grinned proudly. "Then it's settled."

I nodded as well. I didn't look at Kevin's face on purpose. I knew he wouldn't be pleased by our bet. But it was ours to make. He was outvoted, and by much.

And so, we started. Kate went first, of course, Nick standing on the line besides her.

They looked at each other, grinned, and made their respective shots. I grabbed my coke, tilting my head enough to see the color of Nick's ball. Dark blue. Probably sixteen. Yeah, sixteen. The fourteens were this very ugly orange color.

As anyone would guess, Nick's ball hit the pines first, getting ten down, the two on the corners sticking around to annoy the blond. It surprised me, considering the amount of strength that had been put on that shot. He had probably shot rather off, not to tumble those two.

My eyes drifted to our line just in time to see all ten pines going down, Kate lifting her arms in victory. I stood up and hit her hands in high five. She chuckled, turned around and smiled proudly at Nick. The boy only glared.

"You're good," Alex said from his seat, picking up his beer and taking a long swing. "That will only make my winning sweeter."

"Don't count your good luck yet," she said, taking a seat on the table.

I lifted my eyes to the screen above the lines. A cross stood proudly under Kate's name. A good start was always good for the spirit. Especially when it came down to Kate and me.

Kevin leaned over the table, giving me a small smile. Even though he was from the other team, he still sat on our table. Neither of the guys would have complained, and I wasn't going to be the one to do so. "You having fun?"

I nodded, even though we've only been there a couple of minutes. "Bowling it's always fun."

"That's good to know."

I grinned. I wanted to kiss him.

I turned around, watching Howie throw the ball, barely hitting three pines. I grimaced for him. No wondered he groaned when we settle the amount. I would have too. Hell, I would have been against betting altogether.

I heard a crash, wiped my head around and saw Alex with a smug smile on his lips. Spare. Obviously. With the fifteen ball he had picked up, who wouldn't?

Brian hit six while Kevin picked up his ball. Another sixteen. Gosh, how could these guys master that? I could barely lift a 12, an eleven when my hand started hurting -- because it would start hurting after forty minutes with the 12.

I stood up, picking up the 12.

"What? A twelve?" I turned around only to see Alex chuckling. "You gotta start working out more buddy. You're too skinny."

In other given situation I might have been mad at the comment -- don't ask me why -- but right now I was having far too much fun to be bothered by it. I lifted the ball in my hand, my fingers tightly in the holes. I leaned it against my cast, even though I usually did it against my open palm. I looked at the line, took a deep breath, and took the three steps, sliding my right leg down and to my left. The ball went down in a straight line, hitting number one perfectly. The rest was just physics and domino reaction. I grinned.

I turned around, Kate giving me two thumbs up. I shrugged nonchalantly, even though I had a huge grin on my lips. Alex nodded approvingly, a satisfied smile on his lips. Kevin gave me a warm smile, making me want to kiss him again.

I gave Kate high five as she stood up to take her shot, Nick already waiting for her at the line.

Alex and Howie were talking about something in particular, and I only saw Alex shrugging. He leaned to the side, getting something out of the pocket in his pants. It took me a minute to realize it was his pack of cigarettes, his Zippo in hand. He lit it in one motion, letting out a long puff.

I chuckled. He must have heard me, I don't really know how over the noise, but he turned around to look at me. He only had to lift his eyebrows for me to shrug. He grinned as he handed me the ciggie.

I took it in between my fingers, taking out a long drag. I smiled as I felt the nicotine entering my lungs. Kate must have seen me when she made his way back to the table, coz she grinned at me.

"Uh!," she said aloud, "that reminds me." She took a couple of steps towards her chair, grabbing something from her small purse, which she had placed against it. When she turned back, her eyes were dancing and she had her pack of More in one hand, her Zippo in the other.

She got out one cigarette, lighting it in one quick movement. I could almost hear her sigh in contempt as she let out the smoke. Returning Alex's cigarette to him, I grabbed the one Kate offered me, taking another long drag.

"You smoke?"

The question caught me off guard as I turned around to look at Kevin. I could only nod, taking another drag. "It's not a habit of mine, but yeah."

"And bowling certainly calls for it."

And it did. Every time Kate and I went bowling, we would smoke. Not much, barely five or six cigarettes in between the two of us, but it was enough.

Kevin frowned slightly. I wanted to grin. Kevin didn't know everything about me. Barely Kate knew everything about me. But I bit back my grin. Something in the back of my mind told me it would not look good given the circumstances.

"It's bad for you," Kevin said with a stern look.

Oh, he would have said much more if we weren't in public. I shrugged. "I know that. I've known that for a long time, Kevin. But I don't smoke that much."

"It doesn't mean it's not bad for you."

I wanted to chuckle, or to shrug nonchalantly. I wanted him to get mad at me so I could get mad him, start yelling, let everything out. But I bit back my tongue and with that my sarcastic comments as Kate gave me a calculating look. I sighed softly. I wouldn't let everything go down the drain.

I leaned over, smiling softly, swallowing down the sour taste in my mouth. "I'm fine. I don't smoke that much. You haven't seen me smoke before today, have you?"

Kevin wanted to say something, but only shook his head.

"See? I smoke when I bowl and when I feel like it. And I don't feel like it very much. Don't worry."

Kevin thought about it for a moment, flashes of pictures of smoker's lungs going through his mind. "Promise me you'll be fine?"

I would have kissed him at his sweetness if I could. I only nodded. "Of course."

He nodded at me.

"Yo, train, you're up!"

Kevin turned around, looking at Alex. He stood up, going over to bowl.

Kate leaned over, her voice barely above a whisper. "You were closed."

I shook my head, my eyes focused on Kevin as he picked his ball. "I can control myself, you know?"

"I know that. I'm just saying."

I only grimaced at her words. I didn't say anything, just kept watching. It took only a moment for my mood to changed back, turning around, seeing Kate smiling at me. I promised myself I would enjoy the afternoon out.

*****

The game ended rather quickly -- or was it not so quickly and I was actually having fun. The calls were closed, but there was definitely a winner. And it wasn't Alex.

Kate would have won, if she hadn't lost her touch by the eight shot, tumbling six and then four. That killed her score. That and her two splits, which was always good, but not good enough.

My lucky star was on my side today, as a split only tainted my streak of strikes. Nick did great as well, Kevin not as good as Nickolas, though. Howie and Brian ended up in the bottom.

By the nine shot, the game was between Alex and me. Last shot called it all. Alex was down by three. Having two splits in total. He shot, and missed on pine. I did a strike.

At the end, Alex ended up with 177 and I was 188. I grinned as he placed the two hundred twenty bucks on my palm. It was funny to see everyone paying everyone. It was really great. Kate barely paid three hundred. It was good. Could have been much worse.

"Another one?" Alex said, a mad grin on his lips.

I shrugged, the guys agreeing as well.

"No more bets, though," Brian said with a grimace on his face. "My wallet won't stand it."

"Sure," Alex said, shrugging. "No prob."

I grinned, just happy by playing. It was enough for me. We lined up as well, Kate taking a puff of her ciggie as I lit another one. Usually, we would share, but at the moment I felt like having one on my own. Kevin looked at me with a stern face and I only smiled softly at him. I had won and I was on the mood for a cigarette. It wasn't long before Kevin got onto the game, forgetting about me smoking. That was good, as it lifted a weight from my shoulders. At the end, I think we all had a good time.

*****

I've always heard that things happen for a reason. I remember grandma saying that every time something went wrong.

Don't see the dark clouds around you; see the sun that will shine through them.

I believed her. Whenever something wrong happened, I believed her that it was for a greater good and something good would come out of it.

Now, I wonder if it's as true as I thought so.

It could have been worse, I gotta accept that, but it could just have staid under the rug, as I wanted it too.

I'm not even sure how it happened. I think Nick was doing a small interview somewhere, Brian and Alex were talking with their respective halves, so it was just Kevin, Howie, Kate and me hanging out in the room.

Kate said something, I can remember that much. Kate said something about school.

"Gosh," she said, stretching her arms as she continued laying down on the couch, her eyes still closed. "It's so good not to have to do anything."

I laughed slightly as I popped the knuckles of my right hand against my opened palm. I hadn't tried to pop my left hand. I didn't want either, worried it'd hurt. "I know what you mean."

"I don't even want to think about having to go back to school." She groaned loudly and I heard Howie chuckling over the movie he was watching.

I lifted my head from Kevin's lap enough as to see Kate shaking her head in denial.

"I gotta take Construction Materials, the lab, Statics, which Statistics say over 80% of the student flunk, and God knows what other awful stuff."

"Hey!" I complained. "Mine it's gonna be awful too."

"I hope it's not hard," Howie said with a pained face.

Kate snorted, her eyes still closed. "Something tells me that this year it's going to be hell. God, maybe even worse than hell."

"I'm sure you'll do fine," Howie told Kate with a small smile. "And I'm sure Matt will do great. I mean, straight As it's not something easy to do right."

Kate lifted her head enough as to tilt it to the side, wide eyes looking at me.

"Kevin told me about it," Howie said with a small smile. "I'm glad you're doing so good in school."

I only shrugged, not saying anything as Kate continued staring at me. I didn't blink, I didn't even dare to move, afraid something might tip everyone off at my behavior. Only Kate had realized so far, and I wanted to make sure it stayed that way.

"Yeah," Kevin said, running his fingers through my hair as he looked down at me, "I'm really proud of him."

I didn't look up, my mind going through the various scenarios, worrying if Kevin might feel something a little bit off by my reactions, by the fact that I didn't add anything to the conversation just when I felt wind passing by and air coming back to my lungs. I could say I was saved by the bell, as Kevin checked his watch and decided it was more than late for them to head to the venue.

I stood up in one swift movement so quickly, my head hurt for a second. I picked up my backpack, deliberately not looking at her, even though I could feel her eyes almost boring a whole on my back.

Howie said something and Kevin shook his head. I wasn't really listening to them.

Kevin jerked his head towards the door, but Kate spoke up before I got a chance to say anything.

"Why don't you two go ahead? We'll see you there."

Kevin frowned slightly at me, tilting his head. "You sure?"

I've known Kate long enough to be able to realize whenever she was in a very peculiar mood; today was one of them. Knowing what was best for me, and my heath, I decided to stay out of it.

"Yeah," she said with her sweet voice, but I could hear the change of notes. "We'll do some investigation in the meantime. Don't mind us."

Kevin seemed to think about it for another moment before nodding. He walked over me and gave me a small peck on the lips. He had barely said his goodbyes, along with Howie, that she turned around to stare at me.

"What the hell was that all about?"

I sighed softly. "Kate--"

"You're doing it again, aren't you?"

"I'm not--"

"Yes you are! You think I don't know you? You think I don't see where you're going with this?"

"God, Kate, you're--"

"Don't you even dare say I'm over-reacting, because you perfectly well know I'm not."

I let out a long sigh. "If you could just let me finish a whole sentence, maybe I'd be able to explain."

She looked at me hard, her brown eyes darkening, getting borderline black, and she nodded.

"I didn't mean to."

"Sure you didn't!"

"Let me talk!"

She sighed again, and she just crossed her arms on her chest.

I wanted to yell at her once again, but resisted the urge. "I didn't mean to." She was about to cut me off when I continued quickly. "I really didn't, alright?" My voice lowered a couple of octaves. I hadn't meant for it to do that.

She tilted her head, giving me pensive eyes and they cleared visibly. "You shouldn't do that."

"You think I don't know?"

"You almost flunk first year."

I flinched instinctively. I hated it when she reminded me of my failures. "I know."

"Don't you remember our first year?"

"Kate--"

"Don't you remember that we barely opened up the books? I almost flunked two subjects!"

"I know."

"Are you sure? Coz you sure as hell don't show it, so let me remind you," Kate shook her head, walking over to the other side of the room. I knew her better than to try and get into her monologue. "I almost flunked two subjects and you almost flunked three."

I bit my lower lip.

"We spend most of our time either going bowling or just watching TV."

"I know," I muttered softly, and even if she had heard me, she would have pretend she didn't.

"We sucked that year," she was so angry, her usually clear brown eyes had darkened considerably. "You would read most of the time and I would play Nintendo and we would pass the pages of the notebooks before the exams. Then, after our first grades pop up, flunking all of them, we would shrug and say we'd do better on the next. The thing is, our studying strategy didn't change. You still read and I still played Nintendo. And when the time came for the second tests, we didn't study more than we did for the first."

"I know!"

But she continued uninterrupted. "For midterms, we said we were going to study, because, lets face it, we actually needed it. Our average was below ground zero and we both knew it. So we tried to study, and didn't really succeeded, did we? Because instead of sitting on our desks and staring at the pages and doing exercises, we would pass the pages once again and once we got bored, you'd go to the pool, and I would eat ice-cream while watching TV. So we barely studied, and we had the arrogance of giving the midterms and feeling good about it because, to ourselves, to our deluded minds, we actually studied. Hence, we didn't. And so it showed on the grades." She snorted. "I needed 85 and almost every subject, just to pass. And you needed more than that in two subjects."

"I remember," I whispered.

"Then why did you pretend we were good? Why did you tell him that?"

I sighed. "Because I couldn't bear tell him my scholastic life sucks."

Kate shook her head. "You lied to him." She paused, biting her lower lip. "You're doing it again Matt. You're lying for not obvious reason. You're doing it..." she sighed in frustration. "I have no idea why you're doing it."

I pondered her words for a second. She was right. I had lied right to his face. I could remember the second I did it, back at Nick's place all those months ago, and I had barely even realized it. I shook my head. That was a lie too. I had known I was lying; I just didn't care, it had come so naturally. Just like it used to. "I know."

"You gotta tell him--"

I didn't let her finish the sentence and I really didn't care. "No."

"Matt--"

"No!" My voice raised slightly, my tone adamant. I was sure of my decision. "I don't want to, alright? I won't."

"Why"?

"Don't you know how he's gonna react? Can't you really tell? He'll hate me."

"He loves you."

I continued like I hadn't heard her, and maybe, in the back of my mind, I really hadn't. "I lied to him and we were barely friends. And I've lied to him a couple more times since then. I can't tell him."

"It's not that bad."

I shook my head and wondered since when I was actually worrying about my credibility. I never had before. What had changed? "You know how he is -- how they all are. They barely trusted us back then, except for Nick. What do you think would happen if I just came out and told them that half the things I said were lies?"

Kate lowered herself onto the couch heavily and I could see she was suddenly tired. These were some of the things I could never understand of her. Whenever I did something wrong, she would be the one who would feel it was her fault. Maybe because, even if I didn't see it sometimes, she saw me as her responsibility. I didn't know if that was right, or correct, and I didn't care.

"It's just school," she pleaded once again.

I shook my head with as much decision as I could muster at the moment. "No. It's not just school. It's the fact that I wasn't truthful." I sighed once again. This was something I never really even understood of myself. I put truth in such a high place, and then again, I lie.

It caught me by surprise seeing Kate jumping off her seat, her brown eyes dancing. "Then start from scratch."

"I beg your pardon," I frowned.

She grinned. "You're forgiven, just don't do it again."

"Dork."

She pretended I hadn't said a word. "Start from scratch. Don't lie anymore. Say the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth."

"And I'm going to be a witness in a murder case, and if that's so, can it be yours?"

She saw I was kidding, and she just sneered. "You know what I mean. If you can't tell him you lied, the promise you won't anymore."

"That's not so easy."

Her eyes blazed. "Sure it is. It all depends on you."

I snorted. "And you trust me so much."

She walked over me, her hand reaching for my cheek. She caressed it slowly, lovingly, and suddenly, I missed her like I hadn't in a long time. "You can do so much more than this Matt. You know it. You've proven it before."

I wondered when before was, but I didn't ask. I didn't want to shatter her small believe in me. I didn't think anyone else believed in me like she did.

I crocked my head to the side, and the knuckles popped. "I'll try."

"That's good, that's all I ask."

I nodded. After all, I didn't know if I could do much more.

*****

I grabbed yet another coke from the table, popping it open with one hand. I sighed as I turned around and saw Kate grinning madly. She, the reason still going beyond my simple knowledge on the matter, managed to beat Nick for the fourth time in a game that, as far as I had heard, he mastered. I didn't want to ask how in the world that had happened, if I care about my self-preservation at all. I knew what their reactions would be. I knew perfectly fine that Nick would shoot me a murderous look for stating he was beat by a girl and Kate would believe that I had stated something entirely different, that she couldn't possibly beat Nick in his own turf. It was neither here nor there, but I also knew that wouldn't matter much between those two.

I sighed once again, looking down at the beverage in my hand. I knew I had very weird fixation on cokes, if I was to admit it at all, and I didn't know why. Whenever I didn't have anything to do, or just wanted to do something with my hands, I would resource to drinking a coke. It wasn't that good for my health, if not good at all, but that didn't seem to matter either. I was tired. And I was bored. No, scratch that. I have to give first place to the fact that I was bored.

I walked over to the couch, hearing some words in the background. Kevin said something, but I didn't quite catch what that was. CJ seemed to answer, but I let it slide, not really caring about their conversation. It was, most certainly, something regarding the tour. I was used to this. They were always talking about the tour. Once, I had wondered if they, being the ones who got everything together, hadn't planned the whole thing in advance -- as in before this even started. But I didn't dare to ask Kevin. It's always awful when someone points out how you should do your work.

I walked over to where Nick and Kate where sitting on the floor, plopping myself by her side, resting my head on her shoulder. She, instinctively, adjusted, so I was more comfortable, and I wasn't pressing against a bone. I turned my head slightly to the side, whispering in her ear. "I'm bored."

She nodded. I knew she had heard me, and I knew she was thinking about what exactly we could do that would mean we could leave this place without the guys actually getting frantic about it. Kevin had a tendency of being paranoid, but to my very own surprise as well, so did the rest. I wondered, if not for the first time, did they actually thought that something could happen to us regarding the fact that we were their friends?

She finished her game in less than a minute. I'm not really sure if she actually lost or she just let her character die. "I'm tried of this game," she stated, lifting her arms above her head and I heard a couple of knuckles popping. Gosh, we were getting old. As a habit, she let her arm fall around my shoulder naturally.

"We could play something else."

Even Nick looked tired of it.

Kate shook her had. "Nah," she turned around, placing her head on top of mine. "Wanna go do something?"

I nodded against her head, and I chuckled. "Anything you want."

I didn't have to see her face to see her grin. Somehow, I could feel it. She squeezed my shoulder softly and I got the hint. We stood up at the same time. I offered her the last remnants of my coke, and she finished it in one gulp. She jerked her head towards the door. "Lets go."

I followed her, only stopping for a second to pick up my backpack.

"You going somewhere?"

I nodded at Kevin as I looked through the tons of stuff I had inside. I'm not sure what I was looking for or if I was only stalling. "Yeah," I turned around, zipped it, and slid the arm of it along my shoulder. "Gotta do something with Kate."

He seemed to frown at it. "What?"

Kate answered this. "Not much. Just go... out. Look around. See whatever parts of the city is close by."

"You're going out of the venue?"

I wanted to sigh in frustration but stopped myself from it. Sometimes, when things got... weird -- I'm not even sure if that's the term, but I just think of it as weird -- I felt the need of going outside and see for myself that there was a bigger world that the one surrounded by school and books, but this time, it went to hotels and venues.

"I'm feeling cramped up," I said suddenly, surprising most of all, myself. "It gets kind of boring being in a venue after venue." I shrugged nonchalantly. "I don't know. I'm in the mood for an ice-cream."

Kate chuckled. "When is that out of the ordinary."

I didn't say anything, just pretended to tick her in the distance. She chuckled once again. "Lets go?"

Kate nodded, grabbing her backpack as she walked over me.

I didn't want to sound annoyed or, worst, look annoyed, so I walked over to Kevin and placed a small kiss on his lips. "I'll be back before you go out." Or at least I pretended to.

Kevin didn't stop frowning, but return the kiss. "Be careful."

I hated it when people told me that. "Sure." I forced a smile on my face. Only Kate realized it was forced.

"You have your pass?"

He was being obnoxious and he probably knew it. "Sure." I didn't let him ask me any more questions, I wasn't sure I would have stand it as natural as I had so far, so I just kissed him goodbye once again and turned around. I opened the door for Kate, who walked out, and the door clashed loudly after me.

*****

"You're going to get on my nerves," Kate said just as we walked out of the venue, the sun hitting me on the face and it felt good for a chance.

I snorted in indifference. "I don't care."

"Does it bother you so much that he cares for you?"

I decided to be different for a moment, and instead of snorting, I sneered. "There's caring for and there's being annoying. Kevin was the later."

Kate shook her head, even though she followed me down the street. "You've got a caring boyfriend who thinks the world of you and you aren't happy." She paused and I could hear her words even before she spoke them. "What's wrong with you?"

I wanted to answer. And I think I would have if I knew the answer. I just shrugged. "I'm not sure." I paused, looking around, trying to figure out exactly where to go. "What ya say over here?"

Kate seemed not to care exactly where it was we were going. "Sure."

I checked my watch as I heard her words run through my mind. It was barely a little after four. We had enough time.

"Matt."

I didn't need to be asked twice. "I'm not sure. I want to say that it's got to do with finals, that I'm still a little bit behind my sleeping schedule."

"But that's a lie."

I nodded, even though it was a statement. "It's a lie. I'm not really sure what it is. I couldn't tell you. I just..." I paused, thinking the words carefully. I turned around as I reached the corner. There was a small cafe on the other side of the street. It didn't look fancy, and I figured it should sell ice creams, being summer and all.

I pointed at it, and Kate nodded. We crossed and I was still pondering my very own words. "I feel like I'm doing something wrong. I'm not sure what, or why, but that's how I feel."

"I don't get it."

"Yeah, well, that makes two of us." I opened the door for her, and I followed her. "I think I'm just off today." She gave me a pointed look and I just chuckled. "Hell, I'm eighteen, I have every right to be off."

She chuckled along, shaking her head. "Sure, after all, we're kids." She grinned evilly. "We are, we just pretend we're more mature."

I snorted. "Maybe that has something to do with the fact that we're hanging around with old people."

She cracked up, and I knew what she was thinking. "Oh, boy, I'm telling."

"No you wouldn't."

"Yeah I would. That's what's called blackmail my friend."

I lifted my eyebrows, as I shook my head. "Nick would be proud, now wouldn't he?"

"Like I'm doing this to impress him."

I finally looked around the small, realizing we had been standing on the side while we were talking. Not saying a word, we walked over to the queue to buy the ticket.

"What ice-cream do you think the guys like?" Kate asked all of a sudden.

I turned to look at her. "What are you, a teeny?"

She laughed. "I'm just asking."

"You could ask them." I stated with a small smile.

She gave me a hard look and snorted. "Yeah, right."

I gave her words some thought. She was right on a point. The fact that, even though we had been hanging out with them for the past... three weeks, we really didn't know much about them.

"I'm not so sure," I said, my eyes drifting over to the cooler were the flavors were shown. I had no doubt what I wanted exactly, but there was a big difference when it came down to them.

"I think Nick's strawberry," Kate said with a grin.

I could only shake my head. "Nah, too sweet. He's great and all, but I see him more like... grapes, or pineapples."

She frowned slightly as she thought over my words. "Probably. Alex is more of a vanilla kind of guy. You either like him, or you hate him."

I chuckled at his almost accurate description of the boy. "I know what you mean. Yep. Vanilla. Vanilla and coffee."

She nodded vigorously. "Definitely coffee."

I was about to ask her what she thought Kevin was, when a voice interrupted us.

"I picture Alex more of a tangerine kind of guy, actually,"

I turned around, looking over to the two girls standing right before us in the queue. Had we been talking so loud they had actually heard us? And before I could give that question much thought, the next one popped up. Had they heard anything incriminating?

Her friend seemed to laugh at the girl's statement. "Nah, I think they are right. Vanilla and coffee kind of guy."

The first one shook her head, muttering something under her breath that I didn't seem to catch. "I'm Danielle and this is my friend Ashley," the other girl nodded. "Sorry to interrupt."

Kate was probably going to say something nasty -- she got like that when we were interrupted, mostly -- but I cut her off. "That's all right. I'm Matt, and she's Kate."

"Are you two here for the concert?"

I blinked a couple of times and I saw my confusion mirrored in Kate's semblance. Then, I seemed to be able to catch the meaning of the girl's words. The concert. I wanted to slap myself on the forehead. Idiot. Of course they were here for the concert. Why else had the guys come here, anyway? And for that matter, we.

"Hmmm..." was all I could get out of my mouth.

Ashley's, I think it was Ashley, face softened. "Oh, you didn't get tickets?"

Kate nodded. "Yep. They were sold out."

"Sorry," Danielle said. "I know how you're feeling. Ashley and I have been following the guys for years and this barely is our third concert."

"Have you seen them before? In this tour?"

I nodded. "Yeah. Back on Atlanta." It was the first thing that came to mind. I barely remembered the cities we had visited, let alone which ones we had actually watched the concert.

"That's great! How was it?"

Suddenly, we got their utmost attention and I didn't know if that was something I actually wanted. But before I could say anything, they had reached the cashier and were asking for a couple of cones. I turned around and lifted my eyebrows as Kate.

She shrugged, maybe just as lost as I was.

"What do we do?"

"I don't know," she muttered back.

I wanted to ask her something, ask her if maybe it would be best for us to say our goodbyes and leave, but the girls had already paid and had turned around, waiting for us to pay.

With no much choice on the matter, I paid for two double cones, and turned around, walking with them over to the choose flavors.

"What do you think Brian is?" Ashley asked me, getting back to the topic that had first brought us to her attention.

I thought about it for a second. "I'm not really sure. I'd say chocolate, but I feel I'm leaving something behind."

"I know what you mean," Danielle said, nodding.

Kate was standing by my side, her face hard. I took her hand in mine and squeezed it softly as the girls asked for their cones. I did the same. Double chocolate for me and chocolate and vanilla for Kate.

"Hey, it sucks that you didn't get tickets."

"We got floor," Danielle said, shrugging. "Crappy floor, but floor nonetheless."

"That's great," was all Kate said.

Ashley shrugged. "It was about damn time we got floor too. I mean, the previous concerts, all we got were the sides. We can see alright from there."

I nodded; not really getting what she was saying. I was more worried about how in the world we were going to leave. I saw Kate giving me a pleading look, and I placed my right arm along her shoulders as I held my cone with the left.

"You guys from here?"

Kate nodded slightly before I could say anything, and I figured that was best. I wasn't really sure where here was, since I had lost track of the cities about a week ago. Kate was nowhere better than me, but at least she could cover it up best.

"Not exactly," I heard Kate said, "we're just visiting my grandma for the summer." I contained myself from turning around and glaring at her.

"Oh, we're from Michigan."

I frowned, tilting my head to the side. "Michigan?"

Danny nodded. "Yep."

"And you came here all the way from Michigan for the concert?"

This time it was Ashley who nodded.

I just stared at them. I still had no idea where we were located exactly, but I did remember we had passed Michigan quite sometime ago. Around... two weeks ago. That made here quite a ride from Michigan.

Danny chuckled. "I know what you're thinking. That we're probably a couple of crazy teenies coming all the way from Michigan." She had actually taken my own words. "But it's just that we got the tickets and there was no way in hell we were going to let it pass."

Ashley nodded very enthusiastically. "Hell yeah. It's Backstreet for Christ's sake! There's no way I'll skip seeing my Nicky."

I frowned slightly, trying to bit back my instinctive comment. "Your Nicky?"

Ashley gave the sweetest look she could give me -- or at least that's the way it looked to me. "Yep. Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine. I do not share."

Danny shook her head in disbelieve. "Don't mind her please. She's always like that when it comes down to that silly blond."

"He's not silly!"

"Yes he is."

"He really isn't," Kate said seriously, and even Danny realized she really shouldn't get into a fight with her regarding Nick. I had to agree with her. Even thought Nick looked like a dumb blond, he wasn't. He was one of the sweetest person I have ever met, and that in itself said a lot.

"Well, I don't really care if he is or if he's not," the girl shrugged nonchalantly. "I'm not going for Nick. I'm going for my Kevin."

I just had to frown at her at this and I heard Kate muffling a small laugh. "Your Kevin?"

Danny nodded. "Yep. I give Ashley Nicky as long as she leaves Kevin alone. He's mine."

I chuckled. "That's nice to know."

She shrugged. "What can I say? The boy is a cutie."

"He sure is."

I turned around and glared at Kate for the comment, she just shrugged. "What can I say darling, he's hot!"

I glared some more as Danny chuckled.

She placed a hand on my shoulder. "Oh Matt, you really shouldn't get jealous. I can bet my money that Kate wouldn't leave you for Kevin."

Kate snorted, and I wasn't sure if she did it ought to Danny's comment or the fact that she didn't have a chance with Kevin. "I wouldn't be so sure," she said.

I crossed my arms on my chest and Kate chuckled, throwing herself at me, her arms going over mine, hugging me from behind as good as she could regarding her stature. "Oh, Matty, you know I didn't mean it."

I turned around and placed a small kiss on her head. "I know you didn't."

Danny laughed and I managed to mutter a soft, "you couldn't," under my breath. Kate shrugged.

"It's great you're here," Danny said after a moment, giving me a soft look. "Most boyfriends don't come." She looked straight at Kate. "You're lucky. Mine would rather die than go with me to a concert."

That got me off guard. So that was why she had said that thing about Kate not leaving me for Kevin. Kate, apparently, had been prepared for this, she nodded, shrugging, adding a soft "thanks."

Ashley seemed to agree with her friend. "It could have been worse. Barbara's boyfriend hates whenever she talks about them. It's like... she can only talk about the guys when she's with us. It totally sucks."

I frowned. "Why is that?"

"Beats me. Could be jealousy, or just the fact that he doesn't like how they sing. The whole boyband label and all."

"But they aren't a boyband," Danny said with as much conviction as she could muster while eating a vanilla cone.

Kate chuckled softly, not really planning on talking about that. And I really wasn't the one to complain. I mean, after all, I had believe they were a boyband after all.

"They sing nice, don't they?" Kate said with a dreamy smile. If I had had one arm free, I would have gotten my camera out of my backpack and shot a photo of that. That would have made some good piece of data.

They both nodded, smiles on their faces and I could only chuckle. "They sing beautiful," Danny said rather seriously.

"They are so good together. I mean, come on! You gotta accept they can harmonize like no other."

Danny snorted. "And certainly a lot better than *Nsync."

I didn't understand what they were talking about, so I just nodded. "They are okay."

Ashley lowered her face slightly, looking at me over the brim of her spectacles. "Okay does not cut it Matt. They are more than just okay."

Danny nodded. "They are fantastic."

Kate grinned from ear to ear, nodding at the same rhythm that Danny seemed to hold.

I laughed. "Whatever you say girls."

*****

It was finally another hour before we could head back to the venue. We told the girls that we had to go home after all, that we've been out long enough. They said their goodbyes, exchanged phone numbers and emails with us just before they left. It was then that we were able to let them know that we were actually from Florida and confirmed the already ongoing lie that we were visiting Kate's grandma.

We had been talking about those two for most of our way back to the venue. I had to say that I was really impressed in the way we had become so fast friends with them. Apparently, so had Kate.

"I think it's got a lot to do with the fact that they thought we were fans of the boys."

I chuckled. "Yeah, well, we are as close as they get, don't you think?"

Kate nodded. "Sucks we couldn't give them better seats."

"Like our own VIP seats?"

"Yeah," she rubbed her hands together, the wind catching up a bit as the night drew closer.

"You know we wouldn't have been able to explain that."

"I know. It just sucks."

"I know what you mean."

It didn't take us long before we find our way over to the dressing room. The guys were, as expected, there, in the middle of changing. I checked my watch. We hadn't been out that long.

But time seemed to differ with me, as it was a little over five, and the concert was going to star at six. "Damn," I muttered. Kate caught my eye, my watch, then nodded.

"Hey there," Kevin said, walking over to me and giving me a small kiss on the lips. He was frowning. "I was starting to worry."

I shrugged, not really wanting to get into a fight with him. Not when I was in such a good mood and being so close to the concert. "We lost track of time."

Kevin seemed to be pondering about asking something else, but Kate interjected. "We met a couple of girls."

"You did?"

Kate nodded at Nick's question. "One of them had a very weird fixation with you." Nick seemed to beam at this. "Can't see the reason though, you're nothing special."

Nick just glared at her.

Kate started telling the story about those two girls, who, I had to accept they were very cool. I wasn't paying attention. I walked over to the couch, one thought going over my mind, my brain still pondering our earlier discussion. Even though I was trying to come up with a decent explanation, I really didn't seem to find one regarding my reasons to deceive.

I had lied. Plain and simple. I had lied to him. My gaze moved on its own volition, landing on his turn back. He seemed to feel my eyes on him as he turned around and gave me a sweet smile. I was barely able to smile back.

I have no idea where time actually went, because before I could realize, Kevin was leaning over and giving me a kiss on the lips.

"You don't wanna go?"

I looked up at him, then beyond him, seeing Kate shrugging. It took a minute for my brain to catch up with me. It was probably time for them to head over to the concert, and he was probably asking whether I'd like to see this concert. I shrugged.

I saw Kate sighing. I knew she was hoping I'd decide and she'd be out of the hook. I didn't care one way or the other.

"Kate?"

She sighed once again. Nick grinned. I didn't understand what had been going on. Nick placed his arms around Kate and I read it all in her face. Nick had probably asked her, and she had said she'd let it up to me. But since I was telling her it was her decision, she was compromised.

"Sure, we'll go."

That settled it. I was about to pick my backpack, but decided against it. I only got a Coke and a sandwich from the table, thinking that I'd probably get hungry. Kate and I said our goodbyes, and as we lost guys when we turned around the corner and over tot he hallway that was going to lead us to the venue, she hit me -- hard -- on the shoulder.

"Why did you do that?" I asked, rubbing my shoulder with my other hand.

"I didn't want to come," she pouted.

"Then you could have said no, you know?"

"No, because I told Nick it was your decision and then you freaking let it on me."

I shrugged. "It's just a concert. We won't feel the two hours."

Kate didn't seem convinced. "I'm tired and I was hoping I'd be able to get a nap while they were out there."

We reached the venue and looked around. I don't think it would ever stop surprising me just how many people loved the guys. There were banners all around and the noise, it seemed even louder than I remembered it.

My eyes started going over the floor, trying to find the two girls we had seen earlier. I knew it was long shot, but maybe I could get another look at them.

"You looking for them?"

I nodded, and Kate seemed to help me in my small quest. About three minutes passed and I couldn't see anything beyond the banners and the deafening sound didn't help.

I sighed. "I can't see a damn thing." Most of it just seemed like a blur to me.

She shrugged. "Even if we did see them, we couldn't do much. We told them we hadn't gotten tickets, remember?"

I didn't need to answer her question. I just sat down on my seat and looked down at my hands. I was tired and I didn't know the reason. I tilted my head to the side, closing my eyes, a knuckled popping. When I opened them, I had to grab onto the armrest. Everything seemed to move at once, and I realized I was getting dizzy. I took in a deep breath and only moments later the floor calm down enough for me not to feel in a blender.

"You alright?"

Concern was all over her voice. I nodded. "Yeah, I'm just tired."

I turned around to look at her and she seemed doubtful. I couldn't blame her. I chuckled. "Paranoid, aren't we?"

She stuck her tongue out before shaking her head. "Hey, do you have any idea where exactly we're going after this?"

I shrugged. All I knew about the next venue was that we were traveling over night -- again. We were supposed to reach the hotel early morning, and I would get back to sleep as soon as I hit the pillow. I handed her the sandwich and she took it with a smile while I opened the Coke. "We're meeting Amanda there, right?"

Kate nodded.

This would be the last person we'd have to meet, and I wasn't less nervous about it than I had been about meeting Leighanne, for example. Amanda, Alex's girlfriend, would be waiting for us in the next hotel. I probably wouldn't meet her until breakfast, maybe even a little bit after. I sighed softly.

Kate was going to say something, to make a comment regarding Amanda, when the lights dimmed in the venue and the screams rose.