well, damn. life pretty much is sucking right now.
andra can't go to the bahamas on the senior trip. but i really want to go. and bryan is going... so it's a perfect opportunity to be with him in like... paradise. there are many problems in my going, tho. first of all, andra's not going.. i feel bad about that. second, i have pratically no one to room with, unless i can with bryan. third, i just had a massive fight with my mother, so i dunno if she will write me a check(how ironic that the senior trip, the time when you are supposed to celebrate getting away from family and becoming an adult.. you need your mother to write a check for you to go... THAT SUCKS!). fourth, (okay, this has nothing to do with the bahamas, but it's occupying my head) my aol's getting pissy cause my stupid mother forgot to pay her credit cards.
i am seriously hating life right now.
becoming a statistic seems so much more easier... i won't say anything more about that.
my mother is just not getting over my grandmother. i mean, yeah, i miss her.. and sometimes i think about her and cry. but my mother is seriously depressed. she does nothing all day.. yet she forgets to pay her credit cards. i know i shouldn't be hard on her, but i am just hating the fact that everyone is coming to me with their problems... family, friends...etc. and figures that the one person i want to share his problems with(bryan) won't.
today, andra told me that if i use a certain kind of lipstick and kiss bryan, it'll leave little sparkles on his lips. yeah right, andra. i will not be kissing bryan anytime soon. not that i don't want to. it's just that he seems to be enraptured in his girlfriend. they have their fights and tizzy fits(they had one today... he was all upset at lunch), but when it comes down to it, everything is fine in the end. as if nothing had ever happened. i dunno... i'm so confused when it comes to penisites(heh... don't ask).
i just want all of my problems to magically go away. wave my little wand and everything is perfect.
maybe one day, i will grow up and stop the wishful thinking.
