September 19, 1998

La. Dee. Da. Doo be. Doo be doo. It's lazy day. One o'clock in the afternoon,and I have yet to accomplish anything. Do you know that most of my friends have been running around at Great America since nine or ten this morning? I happen to be well aware of it, so I think you should be also. I'll give you a second to fully absorb it into your state of consciousness (however alert or dull that might be, take as long as you want). Got it? Good. Now forget it. Because, really, why should you give a damn? Hmmmm?

You know what? I'll bet there are some people who think that by reading this, they have an insight into who I really am. I have a secret for them, though. This isn't the place to find me. I'm somewhere else. Only a click away, really, but my goodness, what an important click! A click that tells the difference between meta-bullshit and astounding insight. Why? Because people who know me know about this place, and they come here, to this very page,and they read what I write, and if I ever once told the complete and honest truth......something would happen. What, I don't know exactly. I've never done it before, but I have a feeling it would involve something like all my present annoyances flying out the window, about a day of peace and happy feelings, and then getting a whole new set of annoyances for another year or two. Until I get totally fed up and tell an honest seed of thought again. I'm thinking it's easier to throw on a smile and wade through the mess for a little while longer. So the only remaining question is, where did I hide the truth? It's here, somewhere. I won't tell you where though. Find it yourself. I had to.

We were driving past a fitness center the other day, and they had a help-wanted sign up. But this wasn't like your normal sign- it said "Safe help wanted." Does this mean they recently had dangerous help, and want a change of pace for the place? Or maybe dangerous help just applied for a position, and they decided to make the sign more specific to avoid a nasty legal situation. Either way, I'm worrying about my local fitness center........

My high school's varsity football team stinks. They haven't won one game so far, and they only have two more home games left. Last night I started to cheer for the visitors, just because they were obviously the better team, and I felt bad that no one else on our side was cheering them on. That, and my team wasn't giving me any reason to cheer for them, and the only reason I go to the stupid games is because it's the only place I know where I can scream and clap very loudly without getting in trouble.....

What's the point of football? It takes at least two hours to play a whole game, but each quarter is only supposed to be twelve minutes long. Maybe their clocks are off........

Last night I went to a restaurant with this girl who complained that every time she went anywhere with the group we were with, the manager always sent someone to tell us to keep it down. She thinks she should be able to talk and laugh, etc. as loud as she wants. I'm thinking, if the manager tells them to shut up every time they go out to eat, isn't she already doing this?......

I also saw one of my old eighth grade teachers last night, and we talked for about twenty minutes or so. She hit me a few times with her rolled up program-thing. I want to go back to middle school. Do you know what it was called? Gross School. I swear to God. I loved almost every minute of it. How many times can one truthfully say they're a Gross alumni with a smile on their face? I'm just privileged, I guess.........

I'm getting sick of putting in the same rose image every week I'm going to change it soon. Be prepared, changes are coming.....

From Reader's Digest "Quotable Quotes," and for Erin and Robert who laugh at me for laughing at my mistakes: "Anyone who takes herself* too seriously always runs the risk of looking ridiculous; anyone who can consistently laugh at herself does not." and, from my own little archive of internet quotes, "When a person can no longer laugh at herself*, it is time for others to start laughing at her." (*= "herself" was not the original word. It was either masculine, or I couldn't remember the exact word they used, and thought this one fit in well enough to make a point.)