September 26, 1998

Purity tests managed to complete infatuate me for a week or so this month. Now, I'm not talking about the sexual ones (Ahhh! shame on all those who thought I was!!), I'm referring to the goofy ones. Such as the nerd/ geek/ hacker/ webpage design/ nicety/ weird/ Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy corrupt tests that, if you scroll down enough, you will find on the above link. Here are my results:

• Nerdity: 13% Yay! I'm not a nerd! Although, when you think about it, wouldn't the fact that I took the test and know my percentage raise it like 200%?
• Geek Purity: 10.9% What is a geek? And doesn't the word 'gook' sound a lot funnier?
• Nicety: 22% Do you know what that means? That I'm 78% evil. Sheesh, talk about a way to lower your self-esteem, ya know?
• Weird: 30.4% Wowsers, Penny, who would believe it? (Although the fact that I just quoted from Inspector Gadget might tip them off.....)
• Web page Design corruption: A wopping 30.5% (!!!!) I guess that means this place has a future after all. Now we're excited, right?
• Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy corruption: 45% Is it depressing to know that you are most corrupted by British science fiction from the 70's? I tell ya, I certainly hope not.

Let's see....there are a few random thoughts I should mention this week. For example, I'm convinced that there is a huge moth-thing (like "Mothra" size here, people) flying around my house. Somewhere, anywhere. See, the other night I was sitting at my computer in the dining, and out of the corner of my eye, I see some movement from up above. I turn my head, and there's this huge black object flying around in the corner. I scream, tear off my headphones, and run to my mother. She comes in to investigate, and low and behold, the stupid thing had disappeared. No one has seen hide nor hair of it since. My family thinks I was hallucinating or something. That's okay, though, because I have a theory.......

Theory: I saw this thing out of the corner of my eye. Now, as all faithful Douglas Adams readers know, this is the only way someone can infiltrate an S.E.P. (Someone Else's Problem) field. For those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about, basically what happened was that there was some odd thing in my dining room that was invisible to the casual looker because it was so odd, there minds subconsciously decided not to see it. Hence, it became someone else's problem. I caught it, though, because I wasn't thinking about it. When my mother and I went back specifically to find it, the S.E.P. field blocked us. Simple, no?

Hey everyone- guess what day it is???? And no, I'm not looking for "Saturday" or "September 26, 1998" (although I would hope you'd be able to answer the latter, considering I wrote the date at the top of this entry.....) NO!! Today is BOB'S BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!! He's 15, the dear (or deer, considering he does have little of that animal in him), and everyone just must wish him a happy b-day. So, Email him to wish him well, and put "Happy Birthday Bob!" as your title. K? (Note to the b-day boy, who might not trust all my readers to not harrass the heck out of him: proper safety precautions have been taken to ensure a minimum amount of abuse towards your email address)(Note to self: did that not sound totally authoratative and cool? I'll have to start talking like that in real life. I think I'd make more friends that way- don't you?)

In the words of Liz Phair (from the song "Crater Lake"): "Well look at me, I'm frightening my friends."