24 Hour Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-376-2272
"Peace Begins in the Home"
Some of the Ways Shelter Programs (and other helping systems)
Revictimize Battered Women
- We don't believe her.
- We don't recognize her strengths.
- We fail to realize her manipulative tendencies are survival skills.
- We question why she has stayed in the relationship or returns to it.
- We fault her parenting.
- We "evaluate" her.
- We only like "good victims" and enlightened victims.
- We hold cultural biases: we are sexist, racist, and homophobic.
- We take control.
- We uphold unrealistic expectations.
- We patronize her.
- We don't allow her much or any privacy.
- We question her need for shelter protection when she makes contact with her partner.
- We buy into such labeling as: co-dependency, enabler, addicted to love, etc....; "the
woman as defective" theory.
- We blame her for failing to protect her children.
- We assume that leaving an abusive partner will set her free without recognizing the social
abuse and stigma that low income, singel women, and women-headed families face.
- We fail to recognize her religious beliefs about marriage and family.
- We fail to validate and/or understand her positive, even loving feelings towards her
partner.
- We fail to advise her about realistic outcomes of counseling for her partner.
- We fail to create bridges in the community.
-Author Unknown
Created on: March 3, 1999
Last Modified:
lacasa@zianet.com
