Jedi Clinic

Nurse Darry Willis, RN, MPH & L/O-Chick
Manager


Dr. Dandelow Greensaber, BS Psych & Q-Chick

Counselor

The JC specializes in the physiological and psychological treatment of plot bunny issues, sammich & slash dilemas, recurrent thudding, and TMS/TPS

Hours of Service: 24/7, Terran Time
Private rooms with wetbar available
No open fires allowed


Clients are reminded that the JC is a non-smoking facility.

Remember ladies, flu season is fast approaching. To pre-empt any illness this year, I suggest a Jedi Wanger Supplement to be taken by mouth everyday until Episode II. Make sure you're taking the correct one for your special needs as they come in three varieties. Sammich girls, only one a day, so make that difficult choice.

Sick Note

12 Steps to the Smut Side

Available Medications & Treatments

"Visiting Specialists"


Talk to a nurse: please e-mail me with your Jedi health problem. A diagnosis and treatment will be posted on this site within 24 hours (if possible).

Problem Page

*Problem-submitted by Dr. Greensaber: "My TMS is only getting worse, I am afraid I am as ill as our other patients!"

*Solution: I suggest rest, relaxation, drink lots of Jinngerale (good for upset stomaches) and 9 viewings of Les Mis. After that you'll probably suffer less from TMS, but will have developed an irrational desire to storm the Bastille.

In the News

AP- A rare earthquake rocked the Midwest today. Sources are unsure as to the cause, as the fault has been stable for many years. The epicenter seemed not to be centered on the fault (in Missouri), but rather in Lawrence, Kansas. A University of Kansas geologist is quoted as saying "We're looking into this phenomenon, but suspect it has something to do with a female resident on vacation from work, a 'stance' pic, and the resultant near-fatal thudding." The victim was immediately rushed to the Jedi Clinic.



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