The Jewish Wedding Ceremony

For those of you unfamiliar with Jewish weddings, this guide describes the important ceremonies and traditions. Through these customs, we will follow in the footsteps of generations before us, connecting by ritual with our ancestors.

The Ketubah

The ketubah, or marriage contract, is a legal document that Deborah and Joe will sign before the wedding ceremony can begin. The ketubah discusses the mutual obligations of the bride and groom, and it reminds the couple of their moral responsibilities to each other. Along with the Rabbi, two witnesses, neither of whom may be related to the bride or groom or to one another, sign the ketubah. To see more about ketubahs, click here.

Bedeken

Just prior to the wedding ceremony, Joe will veil Deborah during the bedeken. Bedeken is a Yiddish word meaning to cover up. During this time, the groom checks his bride to make sure he will marry the right woman. This tradition is based on the biblical story of Isaac's son, Jacob, who was deceived into marrying Leah rather than his beloved Rachel because he did not recognize her due to her heavy veil.

Chupah

After signing the ketubah and performing the bedeken, the wedding party goes to the sanctuary where the chupah, or the wedding canopy, has been set up. The chupah has four poles and a cover to form a roof, which is symbolic of the new house that the bride and groom will create. The chupah has no walls, which symbolizes the openness of the marriage, and it is surrounded by the family and friends who will support this new relationship.

Circling the Bride and the Groom

There is a tradition whereby the bride walks around the groom under the chupah before the Rabbi begins the wedding ceremony. This tradition has ties to Jeremiah 31:21, where the prophet says that a woman encompasses and protects a man. Deborah and Joe have chosen a modern alternative and will both circle around one another. They will circle seven times corresponding to the seven wedding blessings. The number seven also symbolizes the seven days of creation.

Birkat Erusin

The rabbi recites the birkat erusin, the engagement blessing, over a cup of wine. The Rabbi hands the cup first to the groom, then to the bride, and the couple shares a sip of the wine, symbolic of joy and celebration in Jewish tradition.

Wedding Rings

In Jewish tradition, the groom presents a wedding ring, plain and unadorned by jewels or gems, to the bride. It is easier to judge the value of a plain ring, and this requirement dates to ancient times when a payment was needed to complete a marriage. Modern ceremonies include a ring for the groom as well. However, the ring ceremonies are performed separately to avoid the appearance of an exchange.

Sheva Brakhot

The sheva brakhot are the seven traditional wedding blessings. We pray that each day of the couple's life together will be filled with blessing. The blessings will be read in both Hebrew and English.

Breaking the Glass

The ceremony concludes with the breaking of a glass. This is a reminder of our connection to Jewish history. Originally symbolic of the destruction of the Temple, we are reminded at this point of what has gone before us and of the ephemeral nature of our existence, the brokenness of our world and our responsibility to participate in its repair. We note that marriage is fragile, like glass, and just as difficult to put back together once it is broken. This reminds the couple once more of the importance of treating each other with care, of always choosing kind words and of protecting the holiness of their relationship.

Yikhud

Immediately following the ceremony, Deborah and Joe will spend a few minutes in seclusion, known as the yikhud, where they can experience the first moments of their marriage together. They will share something to eat signifying their first meal as husband and wife.

Seudat Mitzvah

After the wedding, we will celebrate with a seudat mitzvah, which is a celebratory meal. It is a tradition and a mitzvah, or a good deed, to celebrate and rejoice with the bride and groom.

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A Quick Guide to our Jewish Wedding For those of you unfamiliar with Jewish weddings, this guide describes the important ceremonies and traditions. Through these customs, we will follow in the footsteps of generations before us, connecting by ritual with our ancestors. The Ketubah The ketubah, or marriage contract, is a legal document that Deborah and Joe will sign before the wedding ceremony can begin. The ketubah discusses the mutual obligations of the bride and groom, and it reminds the couple of their moral responsibilities to each other. Along with the Rabbi, two witnesses, neither of whom may be related to the bride or groom or to one another, sign the ketubah. To see more about ketubahs, click here. Bedeken Just prior to the wedding ceremony, Joe will veil Deborah during the bedeken. Bedeken is a Yiddish word meaning to cover up. During this time, the groom checks his bride to make sure he will marry the right woman. This tradition is based on the biblical story of Isaac's son, Jacob, who was deceived into marrying Leah rather than his beloved Rachel because he did not recognize her due to her heavy veil. Chupah After signing the ketubah and performing the bedeken, the wedding party goes to the sanctuary where the chupah, or the wedding canopy, has been set up. The chupah has four poles and a cover to form a roof, which is symbolic of the new house that the bride and groom will create. The chupah has no walls, which symbolizes the openness of the marriage, and it is surrounded by the family and friends who will support this new relationship. Circling the Bride and the Groom There is a tradition whereby the bride walks around the groom under the chupah before the Rabbi begins the wedding ceremony. This tradition has ties to Jeremiah 31:21, where the prophet says that a woman encompasses and protects a man. Deborah and Joe have chosen a modern alternative and will both circle around one another. They will circle seven times corresponding to the seven wedding blessings. The number seven also symbolizes the seven days of creation. Birkat Erusin The rabbi recites the birkat erusin, the engagement blessing, over a cup of wine. The Rabbi hands the cup first to the groom, then to the bride, and the couple shares a sip of the wine, symbolic of joy and celebration in Jewish tradition. Wedding Rings In Jewish tradition, the groom presents a wedding ring, plain and unadorned by jewels or gems, to the bride. It is easier to judge the value of a plain ring, and this requirement dates to ancient times when a payment was needed to complete a marriage. Modern ceremonies include a ring for the groom as well. However, the ring ceremonies are performed separately to avoid the appearance of an exchange. Sheva Brakhot The sheva brakhot are the seven traditional wedding blessings. We pray that each day of the couple's life together will be filled with blessing. The blessings will be read in both Hebrew and English. Breaking the Glass The ceremony concludes with the breaking of a glass. This is a reminder of our connection to Jewish history. Originally symbolic of the destruction of the Temple, we are reminded at this point of what has gone before us and of the ephemeral nature of our existence, the brokenness of our world and our responsibility to participate in its repair. We note that marriage is fragile, like glass, and just as difficult to put back together once it is broken. This reminds the couple once more of the importance of treating each other with care, of always choosing kind words and of protecting the holiness of their relationship. Yikhud Immediately following the ceremony, Deborah and Joe will spend a few minutes in seclusion, known as the yikhud, where they can experience the first moments of their marriage together. They will share something to eat signifying their first meal as husband and wife. Seudat Mitzvah After the wedding, we will celebrate with a seudat mitzvah, which is a celebratory meal. It is a tradition and a mitzvah, or a good deed, to celebrate and rejoice with the bride and groom.

Last update Thursday, May 11, 2006 6:35 AM