A man tried to sell his neighbor a new dog. "This is a talking dog," he said. "And you can have him for five dollars."

The neighbor said, "Who do you think you're kidding with this talking dog stuff? There ain't no such animal."

Suddenly the dog looked up with tears in his eyes. "Please buy me,sir," he pleaded. "This man is cruel. He never buys me a meal, never bathes me, never takes me for a walk. And I used to be the richest trick dog in America. I performed before kings. I was in the army and was decorated ten times."

"Hey!" said the neighbor. "He can talk. Why do you want to sell him for just five dollars?"

"Because," said the seller, "I'm getting tired of all his lies."

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"Yesterday I was a dog. Today I'm a dog. Tomorrow I'll probably still be a dog. <Sigh> There's so little hope for advancement." - Snoopy
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Dog Breeds That Didn't Make It

Collie + Lhasa Apso: Collapso, a dog that folds up for easy transport

Spitz + Chow Chow: Spitz-Chow, a dog that throws up a lot

Bloodhound + Borzoi: Bloody Bore, a dog that's not much fun

Pointer + Setter: Poinsetter, a traditional Christmas pet

Great Pyrenees + Dachshund: Pyradachs, a puzzling breed

Pekingnese + Lhasa Apso: Peekasso, an abstract dog

Irish Water Spaniel + English Springer Spaniel: Irish Springer, a dog fresh and clean as a whistle

Terrier + Bulldog: Terribull, a dog that makes awful mistakes

Collie + Malamute: Commute, a dog that travels to work

Deerhound + Terrier: Derriere, a dog that's true to the end

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