"Oh, god."

I turned around, that simple movement making it even worse, and I wondered for a moment if I hadn't broken something because the last time it hurt this bad I had my leg snapped in two.

"Oh, god."

I pressed both my palms flat against my forehead, trying to stop the spinning inside. I felt another poke and I would have slapped whoever it was if I didn't fear movement.

"Get out," I whispered, the sound even too loud for my sensitive ears.

"It hurts."

Great. Kate. "No shit," I told her, burrowing my face deeper into the pillow before another poke was given against my side.

"Stop it."

"It hurts."

"I hurt too, you know?" It felt like a drill had gone right through my right temple. "Oh, God."

"Stop it."

I would have rolled my eyes, but I didn't know if that would hurt. Only Kate would tell me to stop it when she had started it.

I dared to open my eyes. Okay, that hadn't hurt. Feeling a little daring, I turned around and regretted it the second my face landed on the pillow.

"Matt, make it stop."

She was holding the pillow over her head.

"Please, make it stop."

"I can't, otherwise I wouldn't be in this pain."

She shook her head and then I heard a couple of very naughty words I had no idea she knew.

"How much did we drink?" I whispered.

"Too loud."

Her voice was too loud, not mine.

"How much?"

"Don't know. Can't think."

Well, that was intelligible.

I decided that since I could barely put two words together, maybe my brain hadn't process all that alcohol and decided to give it a couple more hours.

"Sleep." I told her, and I knew she'd understand.

I didn't stay long enough to see if she had. A minute later, I was out.

*****

The next time I woke, I felt more like myself and less like the living dead. I sat down very slowly, my head still swimming, but this time it was a nice and slow swim, not the butterfly stroke it had been doing a while ago.

I let out a long sigh as I opened my eyes. Kate was still out on the other side of the bed, and I risk an split skull headache as I stood up. I placed my hand against the wall so I wouldn't go face first into the floor.

I walked, oh so very slowly, into the bathroom. I looked at my reflection in the mirror and I saw my eyes blood red and my face like one of Michael's extras in "Thriller". I shook my head and walked into the shower. It wasn't until five minutes later that I realized I was still in my underwear. I decided, what the hell, it was already wet. It was better that than risk falling into the floor if I tried to bend over.

The water against my head, face and chest helped the headache, lessening it enough for rational thinking.

After about twenty minutes, I turned the tap off and walked out, dripping wet and got a towel around my waist. Sitting on the bed on top of the towel, I took off my underwear much easily and without the need of bending, leaving it on the floor.

I saw as a pool of water formed around the piece of cloth and wondered if we'd be charged for ruining the carpet.

That line of thought lead to wondering how bad the living room area was after the gathering last night.

My head hurt at the mere thought of how much alcohol I had consumed.

I placed my hand on Kate's arm, meaning to wake her as I checked my watch.

Already eleven. Gosh, we had slept the morning away.

"Don't move me."

Well, talk about hysterics. I had barely touched her, let alone moved her.

"Wake up."

"No."

I rolled my eyes. "It's almost lunch and my head almost feels like normal."

She peered in between barely parted eyelashes and, when it didn't hurt, she dared to open them fully.

With a slow pace, very much like the one I had used, she sat up, her hand moving to her forehead.

"It hurts."

"A shower will make it better."

One glance at me and she had her answer. "I can see."

I shrugged, but my neck complained. "God, how much did we drink?"

She gave me pointed look. "My head feels like a construction site and you actually think I can answer that?"

"Good point."

"Can you see that?"

I followed the line of her finger and saw only a blurry image.

"What am I saying?" Kate said with a roll of her eyes, and then a groan. "There's a piece of paper there. I'm not standing."

I shrugged as I stood up, slowly as well, and walked towards the dresser. It was a note with a handwriting I couldn't recognize.

"Well," I said after a moment, "that was informative."

Kate rolled her eyes and it seemed painful. "I ain't calling him. He'll come screaming and start shaking me just to see me suffer."

I didn't say anything. I didn't want to be put in between all that.

I checked my watch again. A quarter after eleven. Kevin was always on time, so I knew he'd call right at noon.

I sighed, turned around and picked up the phone. I didn't feel like eating anything but I knew that alcohol was a dehydrating and we better start drinking lots of water.

I ordered ten bottles of Gatorade and started thinking we'd have to actually stand up when they arrived.

I groaned inwardly. Great. Now, I had to put on some pants.

*****

We had been sitting on the bed, watching TV and waiting for our body to regenerate the energy we had lost by drinking as much Gatorade as humanly possible.

I was on my fourth when the phone rang, making Kate scream.

My head started hurting all over again and I didn't know if it was Kevin's fault or Kate's.

"Hello."

"Matt? You okay?"

I smiled at the concern I could hear in his voice. "Yeah, I'm fine."

"You sure? Alex told me all about it."

Well, that was good considering I didn't remember much from last night. "Yeah, I'm fine." I paused, rubbing my temples. "My head hurts, though."

He chuckled. "That's natural."

"Are you making fun of me?"

He chuckled even more. "No, I'm not." He paused for a moment before continuing. "I love you."

That made me smiled tenderly. "I love you too."

"You shouldn't have drank."

Now, that made me frown. "What? Why?"

"You're underage."

I snorted. "Like that has stopped anyone before."

"Still, the guys should have--"

"They knew enough. We drank because we wanted to, or are you actually going to tell me neither Nick nor Alex drank before turning twenty one?"

Kevin didn't answer for a second. "That was different."

I lifted one eyebrow. "Really?"

"Look," he said, and I could hear him sighing. "I don't want to start fighting."

Well, that was one of the many differences in our characters: I was ready to fight at any moment.

I waited for what he wanted to tell me.

"It's just... I was worried about you. You could have gotten alcohol poisoning."

His fears were justified, even if you do have to drink large amounts of alcohol before something like that can happen, but I did understand him.

"I'm fine, my head it's spinning somewhat, but fine nonetheless."

I heard him sigh once again. "I was worried."

I smiled at his words. "You don't have to."

"I can't just stop."

"I know." I let out a long sigh, losing my wishes to go to battle. "I love you."

I could almost hear him smile. "I love you to."

I waited for a moment before remembering why it was he wasn't here with me. "Hey, what happened, anyhow?" I waited for a second. "What did she say?"

He paused, probably thinking his words and I was staring to worry.

Maybe things hadn't gone as planned. Maybe she had reacted badly. Oh, god, now I was starting to worry. I just wished that, if that was the reason he was quiet of all a sudden, I'd be able to help him.

"It's okay, you know. No matter what she said, I love you."

The words sounded meaningless as they left my lips but I could hear him smiling on the other end of the phone line.

"That's so sweet poppet. I love you."

"I love you too, and I just want you to be fine. If you don't wanna talk about--"

"No, it's not like that, I just... I didn't know where to begin with."

"Well, the start can help."

He chuckled slightly, embarrass more like it, and I smiled. "Yeah, stupid me."

"I like you like that." This time I chuckled.

"Ha. Ha. Ha. Very funny."

"I know."

I could imagine him glaring at me and it made my grin wider.

"Things went good." He paused. "Hmmm... it wasn't like I was expecting her to stand up and hug me in pride, but she did take it in stride. She told me I should have told her sooner."

I frowned. "She knew."

"Yes," he said, even though it hadn't been a question. "She knew."

I chuckled. "Well, that's interesting. You fooled thousands of girls into thinking you just might marry them after all and your mother knew."

"She said she didn't know per say, but she was half expecting it." He snorted in self-deprecation. "She said it had to do with my lousy track in relationships. She said that either I was gay or just really bad with women."

I laughed, my hand moving to my forehead as it started hurting once again. "That's a good one."

I heard mock of hurt in his tone. "It's not. I had good relationships with women."

I lifted one eyebrow. "Oh really?"

I heard him swallow thickly and I bit back the laugh. "Well, that's beyond the point."

"I thought you were gay," I said, teasingly.

"I am."

"And what was that about relationships with women?"

"I just meant--"

"Yes, what exactly did you mean?"

He groaned. "Forget it, alright. Nothing. I love you. I love you and only you."

I smiled proudly. "Now, that's better."

"You're crazy."

"But you love me, don't you?"

I imagined him looking at me lovingly, a tender smile on his lips and his eyes clearing as he said, "of course I do."

He blew me a kiss and it made me giggle.

"Well, what else happened?"

"Nothing much. We talked. She said I should have told her sooner, that I didn't have to hide who I was, especially from her. I told Jerald, but Tim's away on business, but I know he won't mind. He's the one I was less worried about."

"That's good to know. I'm happy for you."

"Thanks." He paused. "I told her about you."

I frowned. I had known he was going to do that, because he told me, but I still couldn't believe he had gone through with it. "Really?"

"Yeah."

"What did she say?"

"That she can't wait to meet you."

I frowned even deeper. It wasn't that I didn't want to meet her but I would try to delay it as much as I could. Which wasn't much, really, because we were going to go arrive at Lexington in six days exactly.

"I can't wait to meet her either."

I felt Kate's eyes on me and I realized she had lowered the volume on the TV.

"She invited us to have dinner here when we arrived. I accepted. I hope you don't mind."

"Of course I don't mind," I said with a small grimace. It was done. There was not much I could do, besides pretend to be sick, and that would be incredibly childish.

And talking about childish... "Kevin?"

"Yes?"

"Did you tell her my age?"

He paused, considering his words carefully and I wondered what there was to consider. "Yes."

"What did she say?"

He paused again. I was starting to dislike these pauses of his. "She said you were young."

"I am."

"Very young."

"I am."

"I told her I love you, very much. That we've been dating for over five months now, one of them with you on tour with us, and if this wasn't going to work, we would have realized by now."

Well, he was a confident little one, wasn't he? I didn't know whether to follow his lead or stay in my side on the confusion line.

"She didn't get mad?"

"She said I'm old enough to decide, and I am, and that she wants to meet you." He paused, the added in a hurry. "She was really happy when I told her you were a doctor."

I chuckled. "I'm just a med student."

"But you're going to be a doctor. That seemed to make her very happy."

I laughed, shaking my head, the pain slowly sliding away. "That's good to know. I'm glad she liked it."

"She really can't wait to meet you."

I bit back the thick swallow. "I know."

"You are fine, aren't you?"

I laughed, loud and hard this time, and wondered if Kevin would ever stop worrying. He hadn't in over six years regarding the boys, and I figured he wouldn't, regarding myself.

"I'm fine. Drinking tons of Gatorade and putting a hole into your room service check. That's about it."

He chuckled. "You do that, don't worry about money. I just want you back to normal."

"I'm really close, and so is Kate."

"Oh, tell her hi from me."

I lowered the phone piece for a second, giving the message. "He says hi."

She waved back. "Send him my love then, and ask her if I can to go his mom's place."

I glared at her.

"She can come too, I'm sure mom will love that."

I bit back the corner of my lip not to laugh at the way he said mom. His drawl seemed to thicken with the word.

"I'll tell her that."

"Hey," Kevin said, and I heard some movement around the room. "Do you know anything about the boys?"

"Nah, they let us sleep and I'm very thankful for that." I remembered the note. "Alex left me a note saying you'd call around noon and that only Nick was staying behind. He hadn't--"

I paused in mid sentence as I heard the front door opening.

"Well, that solves the mystery. Nick just got here."

I paused, waiting for Nick to open the door. Second later, I saw a head peaking through.

"Hey there," I told him.

He grinned at me. "Good morning," Nick whispered and I could see his eyes blood shot.

Nick walked into the bedroom, making his way towards the end of the bed. Sitting on the floor by Kate's side, he placed his arm around her shoulders.

I let them get into their own world as I shifted my focus on Kevin once again.

"Done."

"He's there?"

"Yeah, talking with Kate and changing channels."

"He was drinking too, right?"

"Yep, as far as I remember."

I could almost hear him roll his eyes. "He's not even legal."

"Well, like I said, that doesn't stop anyone when it comes down to singers, does it?"

He chose not to answer. Smart guy.

"You three should have something to eat, it's almost lunch."

"In a little while, probably. I'm not really hungry."

"Your body needs the food."

"I know that. I've studied that section, you know?" I said with a shake of my head. "In a while though, I'm pretty sure they aren't hungry either."

"Okay..." He paused, and then let out a soft sigh. "I miss you, you know?"

I smiled at his words. "I miss you too."

Kate turned around in that second, leaving Nick with the word on his lips and I only shook my head at her actions.

"I love you."

"I love you too," I answered with a small smile.

"I should be back around three or four, alright?"

"What time it's your flight?"

"At two. I'll have lunch with my mom, then head over to the airport. I'll call you before leaving and as soon as I get there."

I smiled at this thoughtfulness. "That's okay. I'll be waiting for your call."

"I love you."

"Love you too."

"I'm leaving. Take care, all right. And have a nice lunch, okay?"

I chuckled. "Thanks. You too."

"Take care, love you."

"Love you."

"Bye."

"Bye."

I hung up and let out a soft sigh. To my own surprise, I was missing him.

With a small smile, I stood up and joined the guys on the floor, watching TV for a while.

*****

During practice, I saw Alex leaving for a smoke, Amanda staying behind and I figured I'd join him.

I walked out of the dressing room and trotted a couple of feet before catching up with him.

"Alex!"

He turned around, and smiled at me when he saw me. "This is getting to be a habit," he said with a grin.

I nodded. "Had a craving for a smoke and decided, what the hell?"

We walked silently until we reached the parking lot, leaning against the wall, side by side, and we both lit our cigarettes.

"Did Kevin say something?" I asked. "About last night, I mean."

He shrugged it off, taking a log drag. "Nah, don't worry about it kid."

I tilted my head to the side. "You sure?"

He nodded. "Yep. It was just the old lecture about how underage drinking was wrong, how you were inexperienced, how something could have happened, yada, yada, yada."

I laughed at his mockery of Kevin. "I can picture it."

He chuckled, shaking his head and taking another drag. "He's always like that. He's been saying the same thing since... hell, since I was seventeen."

"You used to drink back then?"

He nodded. "Yep. Was an old pain in the ass, let me tell you." He snorted. "Can't believe how you put up with him."

I snorted. "I wonder myself that sometimes."

He laughed and I just took another drag.

"I've been meaning to ask you something," I said slowly, looking down at the floor, fidgeting with the cigarette in my hand.

"Sure."

"I wanted to ask Nick, but not with Kate with him."

"Now, that's a tough one. They seemed to be stuck at the hip."

I laughed. "Yeah, I know."

"Fire away."

I tried to find the words, tilting my head to the side and taking another drag, finishing the cigarette. I put it out with the heel of my shoe and got another one from the pack and light it.

"When the girls got on tour... Well, when they were going to arrive, CJ said..." I took a long drag. "She said something about not knowing about PDAs--" He snorted, but I continued, "and Kevin told her that he'd been in this a lot longer than her." I paused. "What did he mean?"

He seemed to be considering his words very carefully, as he took a couple of drags before he could answer me.

"That's... complicated."

"How so?"

He shrugged. "He meant... he's been doing this hiding a lot longer than she has known him. He's... you knew that no one besides Brian knew, right?" I nodded and he continued. "Well, he's been very good at it, let me tell you, because he fooled us for six years."

Alex took another drag.

"I mean, I know Howie was starting to wonder what side Kevin played for, especially after breaking it off with Kristen and all that. But I've never seen him with a guy, so there was no prove he was gay." Alex shrugged. "He was good, let me tell you. We didn't know."

I nodded inwardly, waiting for him to continue his explanation.

"He knows about this. He knows about the hiding, the lying to his friends, he knows what to do and what not. If anyone knows, it's gotta be him, out of all of us. I can stop frenching Amanda, and Brian can be a gentleman, but pretending you're only friends, that my friend, it's some shit. I couldn't do it. I know Brian would die before not holding hands with Leigh. Kevin, as far as I know, it's the only one who can do it. I have a great new deal of appreciation for him regarding that."

I was speechless by the time he finished. "Thanks," was all I could say.

He shrugged it off good naturally, letting the cigarette butt fall to the floor and put it out with the heel of his shoes. "Sure. Anytime."

I smiled tightly at him, sighing softly, my eyes falling to the floor as I took another drag of the cigarette. I hadn't known anything about that.

*****

Kevin arrived right before the interview, with only enough time as to take a shower, change his clothes and give me a kiss.

It wasn't until that night, after the show, that we were able to talk.

He told me with details about his conversation with his mother.

"She really wants to meet you."

That was the fifth time he said that and I was staring to worry.

"Me too."

"She's going to love you."

"I hope so."

His hand reached for my cheek and caressed it tenderly. "You shouldn't worry. She'll love you, as do I."

My worry lessened somewhat. "I love you."

"Me too." He pulled down the covers, lying down as I took off my shirt and kept only my flannel shorts.

"Did you check your glasses?"

I shook my head as I joined him in bed. "I'll probably do it when we reach NY. Amanda said she'd take us to some cool places."

"NY's going to be fun."

"She said so."

I snuggled against his chest, his arm going around my waist and he held me tightly.

"I love you," he muttered against my ear and I smiled at the words.

"I love you too."

"You'll get them there, right?"

It took me a moment to realize what he was talking about. I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, I'll get them there." I waited for a second before asking, "why haven't you gone clubbing in the last month?"

He paused, and I felt his hand stiffening in my chest.

I was sure I wasn't going to like the answer.

"I don't know. We haven't had time, probably."

I frowned. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah. Don't worry about it. We'll go as soon as we hit the big apple."

I let out my breath slowly through my mouth, not wanting my heart to start racing because I was sure he'd hear it.

"We're gonna have a blast."

"I'm sure."

He placed a small kiss on my shoulder and I smiled.

"Love you."

"Love you too."

He nuzzled the nape of my neck and mumbled something that sounded like "sleep" and I could only agree with him.