Getting Started Organically
start with the basics

Environmental Issues
the law & the practice

Edible Garden
for food, drink & medicine

Trees & Shrubs
Mother Nature's way

Traute Klein, biogardener
Webmaster's background & work

Cat Articles for Children

How to Give a Cat a Bath
Or why you shouldn't bother. Hilarious but true.

Diary of a Cat Adoption
Cats do not get adopted. They adopt the owner whom they like.

Finding a Job for a Siamese Cat
A cat is never too old to learn new tricks, including working a computer.

Hallowe'en Garden for Kids and Critters: Making your garden critter-friendly.

Amazon Book

Cats in Their Garden: Their benign & photogenic presence

Cats in the Garden of Eden

by Dusty the Garden Cat, edited by Traute Klein

Cats take great care of their gardens. They will keep out unwelcome guests and protect its welcome residents. Let Dusty the Garden Cat share with you her secrets which keep both gardeners and cats happy.

"How do I keep cats out of the garden?" This is a question which people ask my gardener again and again. What a strange question! I thought that everyone hates mice. Don't you know that we cats are the greatest exterminators ever created?

Here is my background: I own a gardener who knows how to design a cat's paradise. Her name is Traute the Biogardener. All the cats around here respect me as Queenie, because I was the only cat smart enough to find the best gardener in the neighborhood, the only gardener who understands our needs. I feel obligated to share my paradise with all my friends and enemies, but that really is not too much of a problem. As long as they observe the mandatory 10 feet buffer zone around the house and do not try to sleep behind my favorite lilac bush, I have no objections to their presence. There are plenty of hiding places in my Garden of Eden, one for every one of my companions.

Here now is an outline of what we cats require in our paradise:

• That no one except cat lovers enter the property. We cats read people, and we do not allow serpents to invade paradise.
• That there be plenty of catnip plants to chew and to relax on. As long as we have those, we guarantee that we will never be in a bad mood.
• That there be a variety of herbs for us to sniff. We practice aromatherapy, and we don't mind sharing our secrets with our human friends.
• That there be at least one hill with loose soil or sand on the property where we can do our business and scratch to our heart's content without getting our living quarters stinky.
• That there be lots of hiding places where we can sleep, undisturbed by pesky dogs or unwelcome humans. We cats work hard all night and need our beauty sleep in the daytime.

Would you like to hear what my gardener gets in return for her work?

• We keep our garden rodent-proof, and we do not mind if she gets the credit for it.
• We will never use flower beds as a litter box. We are terribly fussy about personal hygiene and never confuse toilet and bedroom.
• We keep out dogs who would otherwise dig up vegetables and trample flowers.

I have taught my gardener everything she knows about cats. She knows, for example, that we cats are so much more intelligent than dogs and smart enough not to let on. We are also smart enough to pretend to be deaf and stupid to avoid being manipulated by unscrupulous humans. When we find a human being who is teachable, we are the most cooperative creatures under heaven. We don't need to be told what to do. We figure it out all by ourselves.

An understanding human being like my gardener need never worry that I might scratch her furniture, either. Why would I do anything to annoy a person whom I love as much as she loves me? Anyway, I much prefer to sharpen my claws on cardboard boxes.

Some of my neighborhood cat companions, however, have not quite learned how to behave with grace and pride as I have. Instead of using those scratchable sand hills in the garden, they wait for our neighboring gardener to leave her property. Then they head over there and make nasty deposits on her open porch. I know, I know! That lady hates us, but is that a reason to disgrace our race?

© Traute Klein, biogardener